😏

Ugh. So annoying. I just want to get on with my morning.

Slept HORRIBLY. Wish I were dead. Send 2 giant red bulls and hold all my emails.

"nature boy" - inspired by me having a leaf in my hair for a whole day and nobody saying anything 🍃 #gayart #nsfwart

I love everything this guy does, but LOOK AT THIS. More of THIS.

Found this on my phone this morning. Wow I must have been DRUNK last night. Not a bad night, though. Got second place at a gay bar strip-off.

Naked guy: "Hell yeah, man! Body positivity!" Naked guy in a crop top: "Oh that is a SLUT."

I desperately need to figure out how to do what this guy does. (Photographically, I mean. The BIG MUSCLES ship has probably sailed.)

I got a new, bigger tripod! This must be what I look like to tall people.

Being chaotic at karaoke 🎤

Today is the day to repost this meme about International Men's Day, one of the most unironically wholesome memes that has ever been made. Shoutout to all my fellow champs, chiefs, and kings. ✊

virgin Zits son vs chad Zits dad

I got new glasses! Everybody pay attention to the new glasses. Calm down, can we focus on the glasses please?

I caught the light just right this morning.

I got new glasses! Everybody pay attention to the new glasses. Calm down, can we focus on the glasses please?

Every dang time I've sat down today, I've had a cat within minutes. He's not normally this cuddly.

Staying In Tonight featuring @wayyytoohornyyy.bsky.social

At this point there's been enough churn in my followers between twitter and here so most of you may not know this: Not only are pokémon edible, the inside of a pokémon is a perfectly homogenous, smooth-textured material not entirely unlike a forcemeat. There are no bones or organs to speak of.

I once again find myself in a hotel, unable to sleep.

It's probably time to start working on my Halloween costume. As you can see, I'll be starting from scratch.

Can I do #fatCockFriday #fcf with someone else's fat cock? But seriously, photographing @electronwill.bsky.social's naked body was a privilege. He's one of those guys who just shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes.

“He doesn’t have a mandate” are you fucking kidding? Dick Cheney died the day Zohran is elected he has the mandate of HEAVEN

If they do a 21 gun salute at his funeral, fucking duck.

If I tell you it's still Halloween, it's still Halloween, ya hear?

If I tell you it's still Halloween, it's still Halloween, ya hear?

we just saw a kim kitsuragi and harry couples costume on the street and when gio was like “hell yeah” they yelled “SUNRISE, PARABELLUM!” the vibes have literally never been better

Don't threaten me with a good time.

This whole urban legend always baffled me. I can always, ALWAYS, taste the weed in edibles. Often, it's so strong I can barely choke it down. If I had encountered one unexpectedly as a child, I'd have spat that out so fast it'd break a window.

This weather is wonderful! 80 degrees, low humidity, intermittent cool breeze... The sort of weather you ought to feel with all your skin.

Part of the cost of mining for gold is digging empty holes. Part of the cost of mining for AOCs and Mamdanis is striking the occasional Fetterman. In both cases long-term success is determined by how good you are at giving up. When someone gives you a free shot like a Nazi tattoo, take it!

Purely up to personal taste. Data's a service top. R2D2 is a bratty sub.

He seems… flexible…

A photo you'd use as an album cover.

please watch movies and read books and play games and look at art, please view it with your own eyes through a lens you made yourself and not just through video essayists and ending explained videos please im begging you

"werewolf on the morning after"

ok the actual lesson is that everyone has to campaign in the nude. like the greeks of old

"werewolf on the morning after"

the Muppets have been real quiet since the Louvre heist

Baths were more fun when I was much smaller.

ETHAN IS ALWAYS RIGHT THO!!!

Here we go! Costume all done. Hope it survives the night. (No I don't.)

The Pope is a White Sox fan. That's okay, because God's grace is greater than any human failing.

It's probably time to start working on my Halloween costume. As you can see, I'll be starting from scratch.

Naked? Shorts? Well come on which is it

Quote this with a selfie if you're Gay Dead (single and over 30)!

This whole nation owes Portland its gratitude for demonstrating for how to show up joyfully undaunted.

I cannot emphasize enough how bad an idea this is. Ask me how I know.

"you don't owe anyone your emotional labor" yes you do! that's what a friendship is!

"STAND BACK! I'm going to try GAY SCIENCE!"

Can I do #fatCockFriday #fcf with someone else's fat cock? But seriously, photographing @electronwill.bsky.social's naked body was a privilege. He's one of those guys who just shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes.