me: you can pry these q-tips from my cold dead ear canals also me: what did you say??

im literally just a girl (flex)

allergies are so embarrassing like oh no plants are growing nearby and now I have to go claw my eyes out

checking if he wants to meet me in the bedroom to see how autism is made

all the girlies be like: 🎶 moonbeam ice cream, spill the tea on Epstein 🎶

oh god we’re almost to the part where melania tells us all to eat cake, aren’t we?

really holding space for AI videos of animals falling off of trampolines rn

*guy googles symptoms* results: u might be dying 😢 seek help bro ❤️‍🩹 *girl googles* new tea: IDGAF. maybe ur mEnsTrUating? in rare cases some women “need” medical attention. ur guess is as good as mine tho. have u tried exercising more? idk call a dr if ur gonna be a lil bitch about it 🤷

being american in 2025 is so dumb like “should i come home from my 10 hour work day and try to score a labubu on popnow or teach myself how to recognize an official judicial warrant?” lol help.

imagine hating me and i’m just at home calling my senators to save ur healthcare, tax dollars, and also the planet u literally live and breathe on 🎀 #hr1 #theonebigbeautifulbill #senatevote #redstates

quit your business major, eat your english degree. there is only yacht, space, and bunker hospitality now.

a new autism screening tool but it’s just the psychologist watchin while u try to fold this piece of shit back into its stupid little pouch #autism #neurospicy #audhd #adhd

y’know, king shit.

Happy Mother’s Day to all the mamas out there. Remember anything you buy yourself this week is a crushing reminder of the low standard of care and support systemically in place for women and mothers! 💝

MAGA be like #notmypope

sure would be terrible if content like this were to spread…

more of this pls apnews.com/article/bois... #utah #lgbtq #pride #juneteenth

it’s not enough. the mommies need to see u beggg #target #boycott #dei

it’s wild to be alive at a time when you don’t know for sure the difference between an objectively unhinged tweet and an Executive Order 🎪

thoughts and prayers to all those affiliate links out there

happy 100 days of “the fuuuuuuuuuckkk?” to all who celebrate

The hills are alive with some various shit

If white people have no culture then explain mayonnaise

server: “enjoy your meal!” me (an empath): “you too!”

so were tariff hikes a ruse to negotiate better terms, or a “brilliant” long game to replace income tax? you can only pick one way to tank our economy, sweetie taxfoundation.org/blog/trump-i... #us #tariffs #incometax

trying to think which category of people comes to mind when I hear the words “drain on our nation’s resources” and “doesn’t pay taxes”… 🤔 (hint: it’s definitely not autistic people, but it *does* rhyme with shnillionaires) #rfkjr #autism #neurospicy

we don’t need a registry, we need SUPPORT

i’ve always wanted a president that’s like Robin Hood in reverse apnews.com/article/stud... #studentloans #debt

HIPAA? don’t know her. This is where condoning the red flags gets us www.cbsnews.com/amp/news/rfk... #rfkjr #autism

tbh im surprised they were able to fit the tattoo onto such small hands 💅🏻 #KilmarAbregoGarcia #deportations #stupid #memes

Jesus: (hoarse whisper) hide the eggs Rabbit: (crying) I will

never forget. #easter #jesus #candy #memes #humor

whose trauma do i need to validate to get an edit button on this app?? @bsky.app

anyone have a copy of “the grapes of wrath” i could urgently borrow for no particular reason?

tbh I’ve been waiting for america to wake up and start relying on its own natural penguin resources 👊🏼🐧🇺🇸

me: watching the Nasdaq and DOW scores tank my brain (rubbing hands together): oooh it will be nice to try *economic* depression for a change

like a moth to a human incinerator.

one thing about me is that i will always ask for your name long before my brain is ready to process that information

responsible memeing right here

things ive been thinking about lately pack

im not dumb, but if my hands were like *really* dry and some rando came and told me he had lotion in his van, i’d probably be following him to a second location

but that’s my emotional support drifting to one side of the lane to throw the speed-limit-drivin mfer in front of me under the bus to the car behind me so they know I’m chill

holy shit guys, she did it. the shirt is back and i only realized it with 4 hrs to spare. shut up and take my money @jay.bsky.team worldwithoutcaesars.com

worldwithoutcaesars.com i don’t ask for things often, but when i do, it’s for @jay.bsky.team to please bring this shirt back in stock because im slow and only just saw it and now ive never needed anything more than i need this shirt omg pls (asking for a friend)

god i love laundry day 🫦

i don’t chase, i attract. (mostly bots)

me, trying to stan:

“Happy International Women’s Day!” lmao, omg literally good luck to us.