Reflections on 2025: -I cried for 9 months but I never begged -I wanted to disappear but I made friends -I wanted to self-destruct but I got therapy -I wanted to be numb but I stayed sober Like the saying goes, if you’re gonna be stupid, you better be tough. I was tough this year.

Fuck marry kill: the most beautiful person in the world, your soul mate, the president of the United States of America

Teaching my kids the true reason for the season: the 1988 terrorist attack on Nakatomi Plaza 🙏🏻

Presents wrapped before midnight, food prepped for tomorrow, a smutty audiobook playing, new Minecraft co-op server to sabotage… damn, is this actually a decent Christmas Eve or have I gotten super numb to life? Either way, I’m gonna enjoy it 😂

The Virgin Mary was a butterface

Bundle up and go outside- the Ursid meteor shower should peak in an hour or so. No better way to spend the longest night of the year ✨

A little something to take the edge off (only 4 days until Christmas is over good god)

Nature is healing, strangers are telling me their life stories wherever I go again

Tis the season 🎅🏻

So what shorty cry six hours a day

Rob Reiner (1947–2025)

Don’t cash this until I exit the earths atmosphere

Holy moly the dreams have been gunning for me lately lol

I survived the Star Wars Card Trader Verification Fiasco 2025 and all I got was to stay on this shitty app

I made it to December 10th before having my first holiday-related mental health spiral (believe it or not this is an enormous win lol)

My boy Stephen got a twisted mind. He wrote one story about a clown what eats kids and he got another one about a mean dog

Five Nights at Freddy’s 2: Electric Boogaloo

My dad named me Elmo Callgirl after his two favorite things

Yes hello please send help 😂 I am eternally grateful for the friends and communities who carried me through 2025, even when I was kicking and screaming (crying and sobbing) 💜

One-a them parrot cats

My life really began when I realized I can just make spreadsheets whenever I want. I don’t even need a reason or anything, I can do it solely for the love of the spreadsheet game

I ate 17 pounds of ham and took 20 naps today, as god intended

HELLLLOOOOOOO NURSE!!! *foot thumping floor tongue rolling across table eyeballs popping out of skull howling at the moon*

Let’s unpack that a little bit. When you watch Wallace and gromit do you empathize with the man or the hound

This is the pain of an elder nerd, Bella Growth is starting out Team Edward and ending up Team Charlie 😏 Cheers to getting old, ratties! 🐀

Despite completely scrubbing my phone, Timehop still finds new and innovative ways to remind me how fucking stupid I am 🥴

The narrative dropped throat goat Donnie lore to get me through the holidays 🙏🏻

Crunk? Sorry, I spend my weekends getting chunk (repeatedly slamming Cheez-Its from a shotglass)

The Abbey Road album is such a moody fall vibe

The sky did some fun stuff tonight in central Kansas ✨

The road to hell is paved with smooth stones. They’re cool on my bare feet as the new days sun crests over the dark trees. Soon we’ll begin again.

Enemies to Bigger Enemies

Withholding benefits from vulnerable populations who rely on them for basic food security is the lowest of fucking low

My old man said be a City fan And I said bollocks you’re a c*nt (You’re a c*nt!) Cuz I’d rather shag a bucket with a big hole in it Than be a City fan for just one minute I’d rather shag a bucket with a big hole in it Than be a City fan 😈

This is probably our last year Trick or Treating WE DID IT WE MADE IT lol

A haunted house except it’s just a replay of 2024 watching my favorite person grow to resent me and slow fade away 👻

Why are high school football games so cold? Why are concessions so expensive? Why are the bleachers so uncomfortable I NEED ANSWERS

I lost my 20s to being upset about watto from star wars

Asking the masked man wielding a chainsaw on the haunted trail hike if he’s mad at me

lol ok enjoy your pleasures of the flesh bro. We’ll be here on the computer engorging our minds

Me: Katamari is harder than you think, there’s a lot of strategy it isn’t just some rolly ball game Also me: I MAKE MY CUSTOM COWGIRL GO WHEEEEE

Hayley Williams, girl please call me because we’ve got some shit to talkkkkk 💅🏻

I just want someone who looks at me the way I’m looking at the variant cover for Star Wars #6 2025

NEW KATAMARI TIMMMEEEEE

Every night I pride myself to sleep

Daily affirmation 🤌🏻

My #RossCon find was not nearly as exciting as some that I’ve seen shared, but you bet they came home with me

Bar Bar? Jarbie? Cosplayers should run nations