FDR could have said this today, except he’s dead I think

Google might be racist

How does one stop eating lasagna asking for me

Saw a headline that about how to “war proof your budget” and I hate it here

No one in real life has brought up that we’re at war with Iran

You should have to choose between voting and sending your kids to private school

Got an email from factcheck.org this morning and I was like, guys, we know, you don’t need to do this

A smart toaster knows it’s toasting a bagel

Accidentally made eye contact with a college student’s belly button yesterday and I’d like to apologize to the world

People say “one trick pony” like it’s a bad thing but goddamn it if I‘ve ever seen a pony do any sort of trick at all

I’m ready. I’m ready to be converted by a breathtakingly disingenuous He Gets Us commercial

The world is profane and the people who claim to be the holiest are the most profane of all. I’ve decided to start swearing more in my day to day life.

I did the math, and I am worth a tiny fraction of my weight in gold

The trials for these people should be held in Nuremberg

I’m afraid all of this is going to be memory holed in like 6 months and dems will be walking back their abolish ICE statements. I’m so afraid of that happening. Don’t let that happen.

Jew in Amsterdam here. Please use Anne Frank as a comparison point to explain how state persecution of scapegoats impacts children, that is the point of her example, thanks

Ok, please stop posting screenshots of nazis from the other site. I’m here. I don’t want to be there. I don’t want to see what some nazi thinks about whistles or anything else, and I don’t care that you’re dunking on them.

I’m in a room full of conservatives and it will take everything in me not to lose my shit today

If ICE murdered me, my republican parents would make excuses for ICE

WETTTT FAARRRTTT NOIISSSESSSS

professor and writer Anton Treuer gave us an Ojibwe version of “ICE OUT” ikogaan mikwam=ice, go away!

You know your country is fucked when SEPP BLATTER is speaking out

I’m telling all the people in my life who are equivocating about Alex’s murder and ICE in general to go fuck themselves. Alternatively, I’m calling them “dumb fucks” and I encourage you to do the same

Teaching my kids Spanish, starting with “chinga la migra”

Chinga la migra

Trying to balance work, grieving, and dissociation

I live in a country where the state can murder you, won’t investigate it, and all the most powerful people in the world will slander you, if your politics are wrong

ICE is not welcome here. Or anywhere else.

The moderate political position at this point is “fuck these motherfuckers”

Voting NO on the DHS funding bill is the bare minimum. Backing Kristi Noem’s impeachment is the bare minimum. Holding law-breaking ICE agents legally accountable is the bare minimum. ICE is beyond reform. Abolish it.

I’m so proud of Alex

I just want to scream

I can’t believe there are fucking videos of my friend being murdered by the federal government on the internet that I just have to scroll by. Like what the fuck. What the fuck. What the fuck. I’m just sobbing in my bathroom

I was friends in high school with Alex Pretti and he was so smart and kind and funny. I can’t fucking believe this

I’m at a small conference I was at a year ago, and these people (myself included) look OLDER

The times when everyone is wondering If It Happened are the best times on here

TIL that ICE stands for Incredibly Comic Erections

I’m sick of this will they won’t they shit, just put me in the gulag already

Remember those halcyon days of youth when our only problems were when the Mad King told us to inject bleach

Thicker Kicker!!!

Just found two snowflakes that are exactly alike. My neighbor is a snow scientist and he's over here losing his mind.

First day on a new planet. So many conflicting thoughts as I stare up at a sky with two suns. Should have packed a hat, is one... and maybe fewer sundials.

When I don't understand a new internet fad I just think, "Oh well, that's not for me" and carry on about my day.

i'm on the senate floor, jar jar binks is saying they'll agree to increase clone production in return for better training and camera impants. masterful gambit from the Naboo delegate.

Having sensory issues means there’s a woman who I love more than anyone else in the whole world and I can’t be in the same room as her when she’s eating toast

hearing from sources that people in minneapolis are dropping pianos on ice agents and then the ice agents’ teeth become piano keys

I want fewer of my coworkers to have my email address

To the tune of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle theme song: “this won’t make your kids respect you, this won’t make your kids respect you, this won’t make your kids respect you, Nazis in a face mask, micro penis!”

Now, I know the news may *seem* bad but that’s only because everything *is* bad

the problem with an untrained secret police squad that shoots people in their cars isn’t that they’re untrained