Fortunato (coughing): You’re certain the Criterion Closet is down here Montresor (picking up a trowel): Definitely. Have you thought about your picks yet

After Hours (1985)

I went to a hot dog eating competition 27 years ago and boy they ate a lot of hot dogs. Our normal American lunches of only one or two hotdogs at a time was not a reality for those contestants at the county fair. Sure it's easy to only eat a single dog from the safety of your home when your reputati

As a teen I really wanted to do Street Sharks after buying the complete series DVD at Walmart for 5 bucks but now as I've gotten older all I want to do is Death to Smoochy. They gotta let me make Death to Smoochy miniseries.

the other funny thing is that the only Oscar-winning movie from last year that actually does these things is Avatar 3

I am just a lowly minecraft noob, constantly living in fear of the minecraft pros.

President is posting like a bad ARG

I'm so glad someone died 10 feet from me a minute ago. Now I can calmly finish my dinner being screamed at by the demented pedophile king.

There's a possiblity the WHCA shooter was actually a unarmed dude trying to rush the stage for polymarket related reasons and severely misjudged the secret service's reaction. I have no evidence for this but at the moment it seems stupid enough to be possible.

Imagine Kash Patel gets fired and he suddenly becomes normal.

3-D Dinosaur Adventure (1997)

powerscaling evil versions of internet reviewers

I think my main political opinion is I find people who find joy and humor in racism some of the most pathetic and coddled people imaginable and I want to do what I can to make them no longer exist.

Gooner Gamers being casually racist and trying to make that their thing shows a moral bereftness that is incredibly damming but is only beaten by them being really fucking stupid.

I have a draft for Escape Room 3. I would write it on Spec for free.

Building an elaborate and whimsical set for my sketch comedy show but getting so mad at the thought that my enemies are pedophiles that I forget the comedy.

Now that his empire seems to be collapsing thinking about Sam Hyde again and how he's like a generic highschool bully cursed by a witch to become a creative.

I don't check my timeline anymore. I only interact with this site through the notifications tab.

I don't think you should ever feel good hating someone, even if that hate is entirely justified and comes from a good place. Angers a great emotion and we should throw hands when we have to, but it should not feel great that it has come to that in the first place.

*Fred Durst voice* Watched The Long Walk/ About 28 times/

Just watched "Stan" by Eminem. How did "Stan" and his british grilfriend afford that spooky mansion they live in?

Reminder that you can order pretty much any book you'd ever want via your local bookstore's online website — might be a buck or two more than Amazon, but well worth it to support local small business owners!

Likes: When a minecraft player is evil and talks about taking over the server. Dislikes: When a roblox player is evil and talks about taking over the server.

EvilEnterprises LLC Rule 1: Everyone is lesser than you. Treat them all like squirming worms you can crush with impunity. EvilEnterprises LLC Rule 2: Do NOT cancel your homies.

*To the tune of "I am Rectangular"* He was Clavicular.

Why the fuck did they use this thumbnail hello?????

Me and my Baki shaped friends are conquering the cultural landscape through live streams where we wander around abandoned malls doing whippets and flexing on the haters until one of us has to go to the hospital.

The existence of M John Harrison implies a W John Harrison.

The reason there are no time travelers is because existing doesn't actually start getting good until 2045. Also this is unrelated but all time travelers are actually just one dude and millions of his variations who inherited a time belt from his uncle. The uncle is also him.

*Fred Durst voice* Watched The Long Walk/ About 28 times/

It’s very rewarding to do something consistently for almost a year and finally feel like you’re hot.

by now there should have been a fully realized Flintstones theme park where guests can live 24/7 immersed in Flintstones world, work Flintstones job and own Flintstones property. the Flintstones super fan would especially enjoy nods to Flintstones history and lore, which deserve our respect.

Here in Library of Babel civilization, you can find any book ever written!! Which means there’s a book in here that teaches you how to be a Librarian Pro and rank up. The bad news is I have yet to find *any* book that isn’t just random words *vine boom* Right now, I’m a Librarian Noob.

“You can tell when bad things are bad because people are sad and when good things are good because people are happy and laughing” - me when the Carl Jrs spokeswoman shows ass

Jeff Bezos: Alright current wife, I’m going for the “JK Simmons roid beast on the verge of death” look, you? Lauren Sanchez: Hmm I was thinking a Real Housewife after they consumed a gallon of Bane’s venom toxin. Jeff Bezos: I love you so much and am not a year away from crashing out.

I have never felt more ugly than when I’m actively trying to improve myself.

“Snake, watch out! That’s the Delaware gang. They’re wanted in 49 states. Except for Delaware, hence the name. They must have been hired by Ocelot to protect the SHELL farmhouse. Their leader, Champion Mongoose, is a tough fighter. She’s rumored to have served in every war.”

People who are in CT please dm me and talk to me, this is an order.

Update: no longer think that

Starting to think everyone and everything in art is corrupt and evil and bad and not good

Shits tough being 27 gonna regress to being 26 real quick

Do writers online meet writers they look up to by screaming at them online

Every three months some Esquire article will be like “I don’t think the world is ready for this, but the lit world has a new Kerouac.” And the guy is named Jeff Potato, his novel is called “Cruel Murder Thesis”, and 90 percent of it is him recounting a Strokes concert he went to in 2006.

Found this guys book on Goodreads

Going to the gym today everyone please be nice to me

Everyone’s an idiot, *including* me.

I think we’ve made it as a people when there’s a Bud Light “wassup” ad campaign for trans people.

French Directors: Le melancholy of le late stage capitalism. Le sadness of men… le sadness of woman… of nonbinaries… they all cry out, for a better, more compassionate world. Racism Podcaster who is best friends with Alex Jones: Hi I’m here in this movie for some reason.

Self promoting feels like dressing yourself up as a little jester and going door to door to try and impress people you would much rather have met naturally. Really makes you question what being an artist is and whether or not this is even worth doing.