Calling the press “fake news” is harmful. Calling them “seditious, perhaps even treasonous” for publishing reporting is something else entirely. Treason is a capital crime. Suggesting journalists should face it for exercising their First Amendment rights and doing their jobs is dangerous.

In everything Trump does, never forget that he’s a giant pussy. Nothing demonstrates this better than his saber-rattling at countries smaller than the US (Panama, Greenland, Venezuela, Ukraine, Canada etc). With them? Plays pretend tuff guy. But w/ Russia & China? Fills his own diaper for them daily

So now that the Trump administration is coming to realize they totally committed international crimes, they’re realizing they must buy off or threaten the court/officials that decides this stuff. This is his life’s work. If you did it & there’s evidence, make it so they can’t do anything to you.

Instant all-timer here:

“If you subtract immigration, the Sioux are prolly still running shit in the midwest.” -Man-bat Miller, truth serum

Hi Grok, please make a photograph of a public speaker as unrelateable to his audience as is humanly possible

Jared Kushner's involvement was "not mentioned in Paramount's press release on Monday morning about its $108 billion bid, nor were participating sovereign wealth funds from Saudi Arabia, Abu Dhabi and Qatar." fancy that

"No mainstream reporter has the stomach to say, 'By the way, this administration lies all the time and we should assume this is a lie too' after every unsupported statement." They should, because it's true. lnk.thebulwark.com/3KP4z0z

It has become very difficult on social media to determine if certain videos are AI. Trump has sparked a new sub-genre where pics are indecipherable from Madame Tussauds exhibits

People are wrong to be trashing Kelsey Grammer. Yes, his comments on Trump make him look dumb af. Which actually makes him one of the world’s greatest actors…I had absolutely fallen for the idea that he was some erudite intelligentsia type in real life. But dude is actually clueless, so bravo…

You know it’s a totally real, big-time award when ya gotta put the medal around your own neck 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

Remember when he claimed he won the “Michelin Man of the Year” Award when no such thing existed? Somehow this FIFA medal is even more embarrassing.

FIFA (😂) gave a “peace” award to a wet Charmin soft POTUS who threatened more countries in 10 months than I can count here—and is currently embroiled in a war crimes investigation for the bombing of survivors who were going to <checks notes> sell cocaine that people (like his son) want. So not peace

This all so incredibly ripe for SNL to an awards show skit with a list of [organization] [honor least associated with organization] prizes

wtf is a FIFA peace prize? that's like being an NFL laureate in physics

“FIFA Peace Prize” lol Our galactically pathetic Krylon-face POTUS couldn’t get a real peace prize (that he’s insanely obsessed with) so he went to a sports organization with <checks notes> “a long history of systemic bribery, fraud & money laundering” to give him one Chef’s kiss times a bazillion

When Trump is confronted w/ fraud, he either commits it or pardons it. Idea of a recidivious crook fixing fraud in healthcare (or any system) is asinine. A real, accountable media would mention his life of fraud—or others’ he excuses—each time he or his acolytes cite it as an excuse to do something.

🤷‍♂️

A savvier Democrat messaging machine would be keeping a loud 📣 countrywide running tab of all the paying cronies Trump puts above the law…after his administration lied its ass off that “nobody is above the law.” Every American should know his list of pay-for-pardon crooks by heart, but few do 🤷‍♂️

If an elderly cancer survivor didn’t want to spend 9 years in prison, because that would terrible and not worth the risk, she shouldn’t have committed four felony counts of election fraud…

Future generations will teach courses & symposiums & write books & documentaries about why this rotating collection of spineless chucklefucks stood around this bumbling idiot during his daily crusty senior lounge act without ever speaking up to say the lunatic wasn’t making one f’ing drop of sense

Paco, expert midday office productivity killer

Credit where credit is due: Grandpa beat woke. Not woke. At all. Impossible to be less woke than a narcoleptic POTUS.

My guess is that Hegseth eventually gets Gaetz’d. Both seem(ed) exuberant in their confidence and protected status until, whoopsie, rug is pulled and they don’t have it anymore. Become a drag on Trump’s blessed headlines, become politically expendable.

The guy telling you to hate brown people cuz they’re not from here or like the rest of us: *Inexplicably paints himself orange each day *Doesn’t drive or pump gas *Is ignorant of normal daily human economics…doesn’t shop, doesn’t buy groceries *Golfs year-round, thinks that’s work One of us! 🙄👍

Let’s see if I have this right: drump thinks it’s perfectly ok to blow to smithereens 80+ people for alleged drugs coming to the US (no proof) yet perfectly ok to pardon one who was tried and convicted for drug trafficking- in the US. If anyone thinks he’s serious about drugs in the US, think again

His accusations are confessions, Episode 17,482

The thing about the Hegseth illegal double tap is none of this is a national story & legal quandary for him if he’d just STFU. But he cant help but do poser war daddy bullshit, flaunting the foolishness Like most things Trump, these problems don’t happen if they weren’t dipshits about everything.

124 punt return yards ✌️

Lane Kiffin is the Marjorie Taylor Greene of John Fetterman-ing

A pathological liar lying about why he was lying [down] in a magnetic imaging machine given that he thinks “nobody knows what magnets are” is a multi-car pileup inside a broken brain.

Future news: After calls to release Trump’s MRI we learn it was some scan of his head, but he’s already insisted, “It wasn’t the brain because I took a cognitive test & I already aced it.” Idea of him having mainly his head in an MRI machine but thinking, “this can’t be for my brain” is pure gold.

Serious question: How big of an idiot do you have to be to brag about how you did on a cognitive test you were forced to take? Serious answer:

Final use for the last of the Thanksgiving smoked drunken cranberry sauce: atop warm, crisped vanilla pizzelles w/ fresh cream 👨‍🍳

This is peak Thanksgiving weekend morning mood

Gonna need a bigger boa…errr…truck

“The only way to stop drug trafficking is blowing up boats and pardoning the drug dealers.” —Senile Satan

And in the most predictable plot development imaginable, Trump believes the adjudicated kingpin was treated very unfairly. But not the vaporized peon [alleged] product runners.

Trump’s stated justification for every single one of his despicable pardons of multiple drug traffickers, wealthy fraudsters, people who beat up cops, cronies, violent criminals, and politically connected Republicans is always the same: “I heard they were treated very unfairly.”

Leftover smoked turkey skin crisped up after an air fryer sesh is a life-changing experience. I can see clearly now, the rain is gone…#BeefCake

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Thanksgiving dinner is great, but don’t sleep on the Friday brunch after… ✅ Amaretto brioche French toast ✅ topped with yesterday’s smoked drunken cranberry sauce and fresh cream ✅ #GoldBark bacon

Looking for an easy, next-level new side to try to round out your #Thanksgiving feast tomorrow? Try roasted #GoldBark Brussels sprouts w/ smoked bacon 😋 🚀 EZ to follow video below…

Imagine if everything you repeatedly told people about yourself was a lie. Line, after line, after line, after line, after line until you eventually stop saying things. Your entire self-image resumé a totally made up farce—that you can’t help but tell people. A real-deal basket case. As POTUS ffs 🤣

Got a mac & cheese, potato, or fav pasta dish on your menu for your #Thanksgiving feast? Try #GoldBark BBQ panko as a crispy topping flavor explosion! Make your sides the main character😉 *Prime delivery by tomorrow for most New England addresses, shop👇 a.co/d/bkgO3JQ

Super politically savvy of SecDef Caddy Pete to megaphone a legal nothing-burger public message by Congresspeople to remind America that the historically unpopular felon POTUS he fluffs regularly does illegal shit that should be weighed *against* the Constitution. Weld that to the headlines, dummy.

US Constitution became the supreme law of this land in 1789. Whatever Peter the Fluffer tries to flex on Mark Kelly regarding chain of command & military protocols came looooooong after—importantly, not in the form of Amendment. So his whiny Twitter bullshit can’t usurp the Constitution, the end.

This plaque is posted at West Point. Alcoholic TV talk show chatterbox Pete Hegseth wants to court-martial Arizona Senator Mark Kelly for repeating what is written on it.