Big demand ay my local cinema house for opening night tickets for Melania: Ees Beeg Trouble For Moose and Squirrel

I feel like every time Trump‘s motorcade passes a Burger King, they have to stop and a Secret Service agent has to go in and get him one of those cardboard crowns so he’ll shut the fuck up.

I feel I have to bring this up every 4-5 months, but Peter Navarro ran for office five times in San Diego in the middle to late 90’s and voters told him to fuck right off all five times. And we have elected some real dipshits…

It was all fun and games for ICE ... until today:

lmao

It occurred to me that I’m spending an inordinate amount of time on Bluesky muting people who are, to put it nicely, stupid. So I’m going to take break and read books which is at least enjoyable. So, in the meantime, here is Ripley to stare at you with great concern and/or curiosity.

Mark Kelly should end every statement or televised response to Pete Hegseth with ”Also, fuck that guy.” Maybe throw in an occasional “drunk” or “rapist” for variety.

The sad thing is Hakeem looks like he thinks he’s actually killing it up there. Dude is the unseasoned potato salad of the Democratic Party.

My pro-incivility position for the New Year includes telling men like Ezra Klein and Matt Yglesias and Ross Douthat to STFU about abortion. Non-negotiable. STFU. Your opinion is totally irrelevant.

The trouble is that Schumer thinks he is a fantastic communicator and nobody can make his party's case better than him, so he does all these interviews and it only makes Democrats look pathetically weak. If he was smarter he'd let the Dem senators who are better at it be the spokespeople.

In the NYT story: “Both Mr. Mamdani and Mr. Maduro identify as socialists, though they have no relationship.” Not in the story: “Both Mr. Maduro and Mr. Trump have been indicted, but only Mr. Trump has been convicted, which sets them apart.”

There’s an unexpected opening to run Venezuela and, all of a sudden, Lane Kiffin is being super cagey about it….

”We could have on an expert in global affairs and conflict, but that would be elitist. So we’re here at an Autozone in Grand Rapids to ask Larry, Chet, Pablo and JD what they think about invading Venezuela and does this make Trump look super cool, while my boss Bari glares from the coolant aisle”

He’ll never support the woman who won the prize he feels should have gone to him.

Messaging tip: If you lead with “Nicolas Maduro is a criminal and authoritarian dictator who has oppressed the people of Venezuela for years” and end that part with “the people of that country deserve better,” you have already lost. As the saying goes, “That guy could fuck up a baked potato.”

For some enterprising media journalist, there is a book just aching to be written about how Bari Weiss (CBS), Will Lewis (WaPo) and Chris Licht (CNN) irreparably destroyed their storied news organizations at the behest of the billionaire owners seeking to suck up to Trump.

This Is like reading a synopsis of one season of fuck-ups on HBOs Veep. Until the 60 Minutes thing, 90 percent of the public had never heard of Bari and now she is a nationally televised ten-car pileup of clown cars with people checking in to see “what that dumb gal did today.”

It’s all fun and games until Tony Dokoupil shows up for work on Monday and finds out it’s in his contract that he has to wear a Uncle Sam costume and he wonders why he didn’t take the “Tony the Weather Wizard“ gig at WOWT-TV in Omaha.

Ending the year with neighborhood dogs: Bam Bam the basset Bunny the Lab pup Moxie the Dachshund And my two idiots: Ripley and Rosalita Esperanza Beyoncé

Hoody McDipshit took his mom to the prom and, suddenly, many questions have been answered. “She’s my date” [slap] “She’s my mom” [slap] “She’s my date and my mom” [slap]. “Forget it, Jake, It’s Utah…” [Saxophone plays, long shot of the Temple in the distance, a dog barks]

The best way to watch this video is with the sound off, and watch his face as he’s fact-checked. He goes slack-jawed while gulping and looking for a friend to bail him out because he is just now figuring out that people are on to the fact that he‘s your basic garden-variety dipshit.

The most telling Bari Weiss incident came when "The Free Press" excused George Floyd's murder, @radleybalko.bsky.social highlighted factual errors, and Weiss's reaction was not to make corrections, but to invite Balko on a podcast. There is no truth, there are no standards, there is only content.

Orcas, DEPLOY!

Ripley the dog

Okay, I gotta pop in here. None of these had anything to do with the recent Kennedy Center name change. Issa Rae and Giddens canceled this past February. The plug was pulled on Hamilton in March. This is old news being sold as fresh rage-bait

“In what data the government has so far released, covering the first half of the blitz, a Tribune analysis found only about 1.5% of those detained for immigration-related reasons had been convicted of a violent felony or sex crime.” www.chicagotribune.com/2025/12/28/c...

This spoke to me… “Bookshops make everything better, don’t they? The smell of them, the silence of them, the sense of possibility that each and every one of the books they house promises. A great book has the power to change your way of looking at the world.” www.ft.com/content/cc77...

Coming back your way next year...

the all-staff equivalent of “go ahead. keep screaming ‘Shut The Fuck Up’ at me. it only makes my opinions Worse”

Merry Christmas from “Reagan just got elected” 1980 me and “We were promised bacon” Ripley and Rosalita Esperanza Beyoncé

Nothing. Thank you for coming to my TomTALK.

Bari sounds like a first year high school newspaper adviser.

Kari Lake needs to go back to AZ and do what she does best: hosting a local newscast, doing segments on the Yuma zoo hosting a birthday party for Gary the meerkat, as she wonders why the big networks never came calling after 30 years of telling viewers, “It’s gonna be a hot one out there again.”

1944 Bari Weiss: “Look, all I’m saying is, before we run the story, we need to hear from the other side. So, call Heinrich, here’s his number, and ask him for a comment. Also, are there any pictures where someone is smiling? I don’t want to bum people out. Y’know, keep it light and breezy.”

The Dunning-Kruger Effect and the Streisand Effect, when merged, become the Bari Weiss Effect

David Brooks married his first wife in 1986. His current wife was one year old at the time. I'll let you mull that one over...

World's Dumbest Person Lining Up Interviews With World's Worst People Other Than Herself After She Shits The Bed With Make-Up Challenged Vengeful Widow Town Hall

Between the speech, the Truth Social posts, the press-availability rants, and the presidential photo plaques, it's as if Trump is trying to surround himself with his own opinions, the way hoarders want to surround themselves with their own junk.

Kind of sad that one member of the terrifying sounding “Turtle Island Liberation Front,” was arrested before she came up with a cool code name. I bet it was going to be something like “Soul harvester” or “Pookie.” Probably Pookie…

Don’t think for a minute that Bari Weiss hasn’t already floated the idea of trying to get an exclusive interview with Nick Reiner to ask him what it’s like to lose both of his parents on the same day.

Short of Susie Wiles frog-marching Trump out in front on the cameras to apologize for his attacks on Rob Reiner, or Wiles immediately resigning, I’m going to assume she approves of his comments and that should haunt her for the rest of her life.

A festive and be-sweatered Rosalita Esperanza Beyoncé and Ripley making a stop on the way to Pacific Beach Christmas parade on Saturday

I agree on the knife. I stumbled on this masterpiece! This is spot on! www.instagram.com/reel/DSK53hL...

Watch this with the sound off and it is pretty obvious Erika Kirk will one day pull a knife on someone over a Target parking lot space. And it won’t just be because she’s drunk.

I'm searching Getty Images and found some photos credited to the Boston Herald that redact the faces of ICE/federal agents. They don't redact the face of the guy they're arresting. I'm curious about the ethics of doing this. I don't think I've ever seen this on Getty before.

Christmas Ripley, five years ago. Pre-Rosalita Esperanza Beyoncé, Rosalita being a a primary cause of his face going gray.

Jonathan Greenblatt is the ADL’s Wayne LaPierre.

Mark Cuban just “It's one banana, Michael, how much could it cost? 10 dollars?” Americans looking for affordable healthcare