Cocaine?!? In *THIS* economy???

🫡 Godspeed, gentlemen

Would be cool if it happened tonight, I'd love to pop that champange

The President threatened to nuke the pope, the Secretary of health has brain Worms, and the spaghetti sauce is listening to my family

Wild that Prince claimed New Years Eve 1999 in 1982 and no one even challenged him on it

I have an outline for the first season of a dark gritty reboot of "Beverly Hillbillies" around here somewhere

Punish the villains

For those attending the White House Correspondents' Dinner this weekend, a small question: When you're sitting there at your table, do you think it'll cross your mind that the guest of honor is actively covering up his role in a massive child sex trafficking operation?

Where is Christopher Tolkien and why isn't he suing these dorks to ashes

Godzilla is the equal opposite of Homelander, in that Homelander cannot beat anyone, and Godzilla cannot be beaten by anyone

Egg fried rice

#Epstein They haven’t stopped raping children just because you know about it now.

People freaking about people posting their dogs and cats dying? Calling them bots and saying how sick they are of it? Fuck off. They are posting what they post. Dont use discover feed. It’s not their fault that Bluesky is showing that algo right now. Sometimes it’s not what you want to see. Grow up

This is what journalism is for

He lives in Canada. You wouldn't know him.

Always the architect of my own downfall , and never the bride

what if it happens today

🤔

i simply find it a little hard to believe that shortly after every website implemented ai code and fired a bunch of engineers they all started breaking constantly every single day but its not related to the ai code or the skeleton crew

Don't love this, Bluesky. It could've happened this morning, and I wouldn't know about it.

Yeah man, Hyvee has false positives so often they don't even check anymore, they just come clear the system

Hahahaha I must be the oldest man alive www.ecoticias.com/en/psycholog...

And that's why we're burning down warehouses

Beyond belief that Hollywood hasn't tried to re-boot "Back to the Future" yet Not saying they should (they should not) but it was one of the biggest franchises of is time and remains a huge cultural touchstone, seems like the sort of thing they'd really love to plunder

The prevalence of ear buds has made it more difficult to tell who is having a phone conversation and who is actually crazy

In a year of "not on my bingo card," this is maybe the most Not on my Bingo card

Annoying my wife by calling Dare Devil "Captain Double D's" whenever he appears on screen

EJECT YOUR SELF FROM EARTH

Guided missile drone strike on un-named target from Le Guin-bot

You can't fire me, I quit

Here we fixed this for you, @wsj.com We see you trying to help JD pretend he doesn’t have to wear this war when he runs for president. Nope.

🤔🤔🤔

I stand with Melania and call for Congress to hold public hearings and have her testify under oath so she can clear her name and restore her reputation! It's the right thing to do! Call your Congress person today and tell them to free Melania from these stories and hold public hearings under oath!

I guess we'll have to find some *other* form of justice

Optimus Prime is a traitor to his species, he has a duty to feed energon to newborn Cybertronians

take a sledgehammer to all he built, revert every single "law" he enacted, burn with fire any paper he touched. salt the earth every place his foot has landed so nothing will ever grow there again. educate the children so they know the utter filthy shittiness of his every deed

"Im gonna fail, so why even try" is also my teens position on high school chemistry, and I gotta tell you, I don't find it very inspiring

It's time

The Great Prophet Smashmouth was right, The Years start coming and they dont stop coming; what he never told us was that The Years would be coming weekly

Every accusation a confession

Covering the motion sensors on auto-flush toilets because the decision to flush should be a human one

My "Not a pedophile" t-shirt raises questions already answered by my "Not a pedophile" t-shirt

The minimum wage is $7.25/h, a container of berries is like $4.50

🔥 @rokhanna.bsky.social to Democratic leadership: “Get out. Let a new generation lead. You’ve been ineffective. The base doesn’t like you. The base wants fighters.”

Today is day 127 of the ICE occupation of MN. ICE is still here. Neighbors are still being abducted. So we’re here too. Still carrying whistles. Still standing watch in our neighborhoods. Still doing mutual aid. Still fighting for ICE OUT EVERYWHERE.

He's bad for everyone, you gotta wonder if there are governments with plans for It in case an opportunity presents itself

Eh