On the struggle bus these last few days because it’s been almost four months since my breakdown and I’m frustrated and disheartened that I’m not further along in recovery and still struggling to come to terms with the fact that I can’t do so much of what I used to do. 😮‍💨

I desperately want to get back to creating. That spark is finally starting to return and I’m ready to begin carefully and cautiously stoking that fire.

Me, waking up this morning, to 2026:

My greatest accomplishment of 2025 is just surviving this past year. Everything else is secondary. Have a safe New Year's Eve, everyone. I'll catch you all on the flipside. 💜

Taking a step back from TTRPG storytelling to prioritize my mental health due to recent diagnoses and treatment needs. Refocusing on other forms of storytelling in 2026. Writing is something that I've very much missed and while it won't be the same, it is a much healthier way to create for me.

BREAKING NEWS: Gävlebocken has collapsed due to strong winds! Just like when it was devoured by birds in '23, nature steps in when man fails to step up! @sarahz.bsky.social

One thing I heard over and over again in residential is that you find out who your true friends are when you start focusing on recovery and damn if that isn’t true. And it’s still gut wrenching for the ones you lose, even when you understand that it’s ultimately for the best.

We love a cup of coffee in the morning ☕ And by morning I mean after noon.

Home for the holidays🎄

Back home after almost two months away. Still in intensive treatment and there's a long way to go but I'm glad to be home for the holidays. 🖤

2025 has been the worst year on record (which is saying something) and December apparently couldn't go by without utterly gutting me. One step forward, two steps back.

I’m an overachiever and that means I’m on track to get over 50 days on the residential unit. ✌️

CW: mental health I haven't been active or around much lately because I've been in the midst of a mental health crisis. I started a PHP several weeks ago and at some point this week I will be stepping up in care and heading out of state to a residential treatment facility for the next 30-45 days.

Universe, I am begging you to give me a break 🙃

I was thinking "disappearing" but "fading" works just as well.

Had my first day in more intensive treatment and I am so tired but so glad I am taking this step.

I'm taking a really big and scary step tomorrow and could use some good vibes sent my way because right now I'm pretty terrified. I know it's what needs to happen but it's not an easy thing to be doing.

Riv's got some plans cooking right now

'Cause I've been here so many times before Don't you think I look pretty Curled up on this bathroom floor But where you see weakness I see wit Sometimes I fall to pieces Just to see what bits of me don't fit

It really feels like everything I’ve ever worked for is for nothing and my entire world is crumbling around me.

Hey, universe, could you please give me a break? Please? I’m so tired.

I'd show a smile, but I'm too weak I'd share with you, could I only speak Just how much this hurts me

I can’t take much more at this point. I’m so far beyond exhausted.

What can I say? I'm survivin' Crawlin' out these sheets to see another day What can I say? I'm survivin' And I'm gonna be fine, I'm gonna be fine I think I'll be fine

Today is the 30th anniversary of Hackers

Recording something after getting the COVID vaccine and we’re ready with our dice and requisite three beverages

🩸🩸

I am so tired 😮‍💨

We're currently at 66 followers here. If we launch with 100 followers, I'll have confidence that we'll be able to fund, but it'll be rough. If we manage to get to 250, I'll breathe easily. I need help getting the word out to interested people.

Let's gooooooo!

Let's fucking goooooo!

Sometimes I just want to drive Until the streets run out I want to burn until there's Nothing left to burn about

Tonight we are back over on @entropyemporium.bsky.social with They Call Us Villains! Episode 22: Welcome Back to Hemlock It's the dawn of a new day and everything is as it should be. ☺️

And summer arrives With a length of lights And summer blows away And quietly, it gets swallowed by a wave

A mood

I'm not okay (I promise) no, really, it's fucking bad and I am actively going under and I'm so fucking tired

It's been FOREVER but we are back tonight with Neverember's Enigma. There might be boat races. There might be romance. There might be necromance. There might be parties. There might be drama. There might be crimes. Who knows! We'll find out together tonight!

I’m the kind of human wreckage that you love

Had the opportunity to bring Alistair's story to a conclusion today and I cannot wait to share the finale with all of you 💜 What an incredible table and what an amazing story we all got to tell together

I was gearing up to post a schedule for this week but this week is one of the (hopefully) last quiet ones. Or, at least, quiet in the way that I'm recording several different games and playing a home game, so the only day I'll be playing on stream is Thursday for Neverember's Enigma.

Sometimes when you are stuck on writing and the words won't just flow, it's a sign that there's a piece you need to untangle and I untangled a big piece today. The writing is finally feeling like the catharsis I need to navigate something deeply emotional and painful but that's what art is for.

Booked my MCR tattoo for September and while I've got a lot of exciting stuff coming up, I'm also looking forward to getting back into gaming on a regular basis because life has indeed continued to be life-ing and I am eager to balance IRL stuff with also telling stories with my favorite people. 💜

This storm front has my body unhappy and I am straight up not having a good time

We're having a time here these days 😮‍💨

We're missing TCUV tonight because post-concert crud took me out but that's given us a chance to get a little feral on the server and chat about some stuff and I'm super excited for the chaos that is on the horizon with this game when we make our triumphant return!