It will be interesting to find out the results of my recent in home sleep study. Physically I think this is the best I have felt in a while. Unfortunately the emotional fatigue of caring for my mom and the fall of democracy is off the charts

Three episodes into the newest season of “nobody wants this,” and I wish I wouldve started sooner. Love this line from episode two, “You’re not a bad person. You’re a person.”

This Thursday, October 30th, my book club will be chatting on zoom with Terry wildman, lead translator of the First Nations version. It should be a good time and anyone is welcome to attend. It starts at 7:00 PM est. let me know if interested.

My mom & I are on our third attempt to watch "Cross." I feel like she'd like this show if the allure of sleep wasn't so powerful. I mean, I could watch it without her or start the new season "Nobody Wants This," but my true colors are shining through as I'm listening to jazz & getting shit done

I am working on my new poetry book and it will include some of the daily affirmations I used to post on the other site. Some of those were bangers and I am really glad I catalogued them!

Me: Mom are you trying to take a nap? Mom: No. twenty minutes later Mom: 💤 Me:🤦‍♂️

I want fondue

What’s it like living inside your head?

When it’s 10:00 at night and you remembered that you told your mom you would have blueberry muffins to go with her breakfast on Saturday morning

Mom: Jeff, did you get a paper Me (slightly confused) do you mean a newspaper Mom: yes Me: there is this thing called the internet that you can get the news on Mom: what’s the weather Me: <sigh>

Therapy is a lot like baseball. My therapist is throwing pitches and I make contact and it’s a back and forth like that. Yesterday I was hit by a pitch and I’m still feeling dazed by the new realization.

Mom:I’d like to try to go bathroom so maybe I don’t wake you up tonight Me: well you didn’t wake me up last night Mom: I know. I didn’t call you and wake you up Me: oh, you called me, but I didn’t wake up Mom: how do you know I called you Me: because my phone shows me missed calls

I wish I had the ability to move things with my mind so I could move the wash to the dryer without getting out of bed

Why the fuck is Amazon, Meta, Apple, Google and hard rock donating to Trump’s ballroom project?

On Monday my executive functioning was actually working properly and I ordered trash bags from Instacart. Unfortunately Instacart was down and I never got my delivery. Today I started to take the trash out when I realized I had no trash bags. Ugh! Why must God give me his toughest battles!

I was shocked to learn that October is national book month. To me every month is national book month!

Doing a home sleep test tonight and not allowing my mom to wake me up in the middle of the night. Thankfully she has gotten better about sleeping through the night, but the anxiety is definitely doing its thing right now.

On Thursday, October 30th at 7PM est I’ll be hosting a zoom chat with Terry Wildman, lead translator of First Nations Version. Anyone is welcome to join. Let me know if you are interested and I’ll send you the link. Here is proverbs 1:31-32 from the latest release containing psalms and proverbs

Life has been crazy with my mom moving in with me so this Sunday I’m getting a new tattoo!

Me to my mom: does the idea of doing a cat scan remind you of being at my house … Because of all the cats!

I love this quote from Anne Lamott “You want to know how big God’s love is? The answer is: it’s very big. It’s bigger than you’re comfortable with.”

CNN talking about the possibility of violence as a guy in a giraffe costume waddles by

Fun fact from tonight Seattle. Vs. Toronto ALCS game five.

I wish I could set up a GoFundMe but for executive functioning. People who have more executive functioning capability than others should be able to take some away from themselves and give it to those of us that are without. Honestly, God knew I’d be too powerful if I could executive function.

The world is so filled with beauty and wonder and I feel very strongly both that it should be a kinder place to live in and that it is within our power to make it as such

Apparently TiVO is no longer selling DVR machines. I’m guessing next AOL will stop sending CD’s in the mail for people to sign up for their internet service. What is this world coming to me?!?!

This album is AMAZING! Seriously, mythical proportions of greatness. Unearthing feelings in my soul I wasn’t aware were possible!

I keep seeing commercials for Martha Stewart’s cooking show “Martha cooks”, but in my mind I am picturing the dog from Martha speaks having his own animated cooking show for kids. Although I guess a dog cooking wouldn’t be super hygienic

A hard thing about caring for an aging parent is the nagging voice saying “what if they die & it’s all your fault. They could die from something preventable & you majorly fucked up & that is why they died.” In other news we saw mom’s PCP this morning & he said what I was worried about was nothing

Cal Raleigh has such a beautiful swing!

Friend: did you play baseball in high school Me: no I was an uncoordinated nerd

I feel like Hugh jackman seems like a really cool individual to know in real life…

Not the weekend I was hoping for Saturday morning I call the drs office shortly after ten concerned about my mom to find out walk in hours end at ten. She seems to improve throughout the day on Saturday. I think we can avoid urgent care today although my anxiety is doing its thing…

Just bought my oldest a David Bowie sweatshirt. Pretty sure I’m doing this parenting thing right

Ugh

I like to think Janis is why polanco got the game winning rbi single for Seattle. I had no hat that I could convert into a rally cap, so I made her into my rally cat!

wow another baseball game that rules. would you look at that.

Tie game!

It’s one thing to disagree with someone because you don’t like what they say on TikTok. It is another thing and completely uncalled for to bully someone who has a speech impediment on TikTok when you don’t like their content. My mental health is crashing over this and it’s hitting old wounds hard.

True friends know when they see an incoming call from me that it’s a butt dial.

If you rename the Department of Defense the Department of War, then bomb fishing boats in the Caribbean, and shoot an unarmed priest in the head with a pepper bullet, you should automatically be barred from receiving the Nobel Peace Prize for the rest of your life.

Did anyone choose day 39 as when my mom would start her meal protest if she didn’t like what was on the menu? If only her pickiness for eating was matched by her enthusiasm to help me plan the weekly menu…

It might be time to schedule your colonoscopy if you are looking at the Mariners injury report and upon seeing the name Ryan Bliss your mind immediately goes to “good morning, Miss Bliss” also known as “Saved By The Bell: The Junior Years”

I tried Coke Zero because my office was out of regular coke. All I can taste is the aspartame. At least my latte with an extra shot of espresso did not disappoint.

Does anyone else ever feel like: Deep down inside I don’t deserve to be happy? Or I’m not sure what happiness looks like with all the extenuating circumstances? In other news I didn’t sleep good last night so that is feeding my unhappiness (plus all the things)

Dad wants to work and I want to walk on his keyboard so now I’m stuck like this

Some people think I am just a nerdy loving banjo playing book worm, but they don’t see me at Starbucks drinking my tea with my phone at 1% because that’s how I like to live life on the wild side

Ever have one of those weeks where therapy Thursday can’t get here fast enough?

I am super excited to chat with @catherinemcniel.bsky.social & Jason Hague about their book mid-crisis Faith on zoom at 6:30 est on 10/9. Anyone can feel free to join the conversation. I love this quote as it’s a reminder that Jesus never changes even when the church gives a false perspective.