Well, it wasn't Nic Cage they would have been gone in sixty seconds.

65 points. Up to 4.9 million OR GW5 was 9.1 million OR ... Successful wildcard in GW 6 ... #fpl £0.2 mil itb, 1 free transfer.

Ok, that aged well #fpl

Bruno F & Gyokeres are pissing me off #fpl assets.

Bruno F & Gyokeres are pissing me off #fpl assets.

Are Liverpool being too clever and letting Ruben win today to extend his tenure at Man United?

Who robbed the Louvre? Right answers only

You know if you fill in the authorisation online to get access to your health record, does that just give you access to "systmonline?" or something else? I have NHS & AIRMID UK apps but neither show the results for my blood tests three weeks ago that I got told the last time I didn't go to.

Van de Ven, replacing Enzo for me, as useful as chocolate teapots #fpl

Man United in white ...

Their top detective is on the case...

Long Run done on treadmill. Pleasantly tired as Lydiard would call it.

and another thing: he’s not mad. please don’t put it in the newspaper that he got mad.

☆ ☆ Only @ #fpl Cinemas ☆ ☆ Roy Keane in THE EXORCIST "Sure, you're young, but you need to grow up a bit. Contortions, spinning your head around, saying nasty words, there's no need for it. Don't do that thing with the cross again, use a hair brush handle. Or behave yourself. It's embarrassing."

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Not saying a huge style shift guarantees trouble, but if your squad is used to one thing and then you try to get them doing something epically, wildly different, or you try to adapt to do something epically, wildly different, it is quite unlikely to work.

I didn't know Roy Keane had taken up acting...

Never forget the time the Sun published a sneering article mocking 'snowflake' academics and students for correctly understanding the whole fucking point of Mary Shelley's Frankenstein

Possession might be nine tenths of the law, but it's less than one tenth of the result #lufc

With Burnley fans at work, I'm glad that I'm off work next week.

I had a bad feeling when I heard the away end were singing "champions again, ole, ole" before the match ... nature doesn't like #lufc fans being cocky.

Sky News is platforming a guy who says he's from a Jewish Aston Villa supporters group, but it turns out that the guy a) isn't Jewish, b) the group doesn't exist, and c) he works for the right wing Henry Jackson Society, whose website says he 'specialises in disinformation'. Well, quite.

We really need to be beating Burnley especially given the run of fixtures coming up.

#FPL Are Nottingham Forest defence back on the menu?

“What is the charge? Being a fraud? A succulent Australian fraud?”

Dirty Den Marinakis serving notice to Ange after the match...

Well those replies were definitely not a spam bot lol

I can't decide if that line up from us is very championshipy or not #lufc - I might be a bit harsh.

Ange's job has to be somewhere close to being given a vote of confidence if not under threat.

This has to be a bit at this point ... Chicken Tika Masala is more British than Fish n Chips if you want to talk food origins.

Already on a green arrow. Stop the count #fpl

Today’s Mr Blobby in things is an absolute fave. Here he is in the Fast and Furious 7.

Pleasing thing about this is my average heart rate staying just about where it should be for "easy" runs. A sign that I'm getting fitter.

6km Easy Run... Settling down into doing 600 m Easy / 400 m walk intervals.

And the sales journey starts #lufc

Size 13.5 in these trainers... Just call me Harry Henderson (Bigfoot).

Trying to think of other products like Goretex where you never buy the product, but you buy products because they have that product as part of them.

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I'm not an investor type but when bubbles burst people invest in gold and silver don't they for safety? Thinking about getting some options in that market ahead of AI crash if I can have a small investment.

Greatest line in movie comedy - If you ask me this was Arson ... - Somebody arseing about.

Thing is, Jenrick knows who he's talking to. 50-60 year old lads who go on Tommy Robinson marches. You'd hope they'd see him for the massive fraud he is. But those fellas like to re-edit their memories too.

RIP Virginia Giuffre. She sunk the bastard.

The fact he has the opportunity to give the titles up and hasn't had them forcibly removed is shameful.

"The King is prepared to allow him to continue with the use of the titles 'Randy Andy' and 'Nonce Andrew'..."

That Nazi from Tingley. Called himself the Fuhrer? Nice wallpaper you mentalist. Hope the lads in Armley see it

Has Henry Winter taken a severe knock to the noggin ?

I love doing this when I have a week off work. The reason I have a separate Saturday alarm is that I don't work every Saturday.