This links to an article called "notes dump 2026" by thecatamites, and it is the games writing equivalent of a pile of laundry items that slowly accrue because they each require too niche a wash cycle, yet every sock is incredible.

the only video worth rescuing from my deleted twtter

"today i will visit my favourite web site, bullshit headlines dot com"

When you give Jank cash you fund more @abeewords.bsky.social lines like this. It is a sound investment strategy. Warren Buffet would subscribe to Jank, if he knew about it.

"If Titanium Court were a person I would go to its Edinburgh Fringe show, but not invite it to my wedding." www.jank.cool/titanium-cou...

I'm sorry for not writing "proper" posts but here's the mental image of a Flood bloatbag exploding in Elliot's face and launching him into the sea, dead.

Robots can now dance exactly like a human. Specifically, me.

A 100% correct opinion, only on Jank.cool.

I GET LOGGED OUT. BUT I LOG IN AGAIN

Zero Parades: For Dead Spies is "sleeker, sexier, more self-consciously dangerous" than Disco Elysium. "It is outsider art made from the foyer, safe from the rain." www.jank.cool/zero-parades...

going to start calling my home the "Holy Brendan Empire"

Won’t be doing that. It’s the duty of all games journalists to enforce an indoor voice when the brands start shouting

Half-Life 2 (2004)

Whoever wins, we lose (our balance). www.jank.cool/the-xenomorp...

this is the best, most succinct encapsulation of the game grifter sphere i’ve ever read

I now work in the magical library to provide for my baby.

:)

mfw you try to talk to me about the MIxtape discourse Anyway here's my contribution to the Mixtape discourse

Pokopia? On PC? It's called Abiotic Factor www.jank.cool/abiotic-fact...

I have scheduled a bunch of popcorn posts about game characters fighting each other, for important reasons.

On a long enough timeline, every game is a PC game www.jank.cool/on-a-long-en...

fun with physics part 4

Peter Molyneux is a pop star www.jank.cool/peter-molyne...

Mmmm, pizza. www.jank.cool/if-you-want-...

Can a game be "so bad it's good"? www.jank.cool/can-a-game-b...

Nidhogg (2014)

Having your own website means you can review a 2-year-old game you love on the flimsiest excuse.

Jank now includes Nic Reuben. Here's his debut piece about extraction shooters for people who hate multiplayer.

Distract yourself from Bluesky glitches with a new public episode! Proven-wrong guesses about the GTA-leak, almost0-certainly-wrong guesses about Epic's Disney shooter, and discussions of three actual videogames. Find it on Patreon or wherever you get your podcasts: www.patreon.com/posts/episod...

I'm sorry Polygon but you forgot a number of exquisite bangers: www.rockpapershotgun.com/the-12-most-...

This is some neat-sounding bullshit I wrote because Idols Of Ash is actually about being scared by a giant centipede so you press W too hard and fall down a hole

Last week we chose the best multiplayer maps. Now we turn our crooked gaze to singleplayer levels. www.jank.cool/the-best-sin...

i have very rapidly become incapable of thinking about anything that isn’t this video

shit i forgot to put Hang 'Em High in this

incidentally, for no reason in particular, i think it's time for us all to play this game in this trying time: thecatamites.itch.io/murder-dog-i...

Hunt: Showdown walked (quietly into a swamp) so that Marathon could run (headfirst into discourse)

I can break this game in ways you'll never understand

Jank has been going for 2 months. In that time we’ve published over 100 articles. We are not fuckin around. Here's a rundown of our work so far. www.jank.cool

Here's a game that darkly simulates the sense of wonder from your first steps in Minecraft. www.jank.cool/lucid-blocks...

This is like a Twitch stream but you read it.

My new column is basically an excuse to roleplay a bus driver, a fighter pilot, an accountant, an IT technician, a car mechanic, a chef, a spaceship engineer, a farmer, a truck driver, a prime minister, a scaffolder, a book shop owner. But never EVER an estate agent. www.jank.cool/ng-in-sim-is...

I might be the only games journalist still working who played Screamer (1995) upon its release. I'm sure that knowledge will be relevant someday, but it wasn't for reviewing this reboot

Psycho Patrol R is a hilarious, Finland-coded, euro-septic vision of our horrible future and one of the best immersive sims I've played in ages. aftermath.site/psycho-patrol-...

The good kind of AI in videogames. www.jank.cool/i-am-the-thi...

Hideo Kojima introducing a baseball player in a video game

The best kick of 2021 is a tenner right now: store.steampowered.com/app/1252330/...

If you like configuring routers (weird) here's a game for you. www.jank.cool/ah-a-job-sim...

What are you running for? www.jank.cool/what-are-you...