After hanging on in there for an offer from MLS that never came, ‘Mo Salad, with his name like a polite offer from a health conscious Subway server, agrees to go play soccer for Liver Pool some more.

🇲🇽🤝🇺🇸

The greatest soccer franchise in all of 🇷🇺 Share if you agree

Real Salt Lake Madrid get their asses handed to them with fries on the side by the Soccer Cannons, after Vanilla Rice inserts two sidewinder felony kicks from downtown in London England.

Why have a photo of John Lennon

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South Coast Saints lame soccer plays sees them lose 3 to 1 to the Soccer Chickens, confirmizing their status as the losingest franchise in the English EPL. Like some humongous gator, the jaws of the danger zone have chomped down real hard on their holy asses, taking them down to the minor leagues

The Soccer Cannons’ dreams of getting their fingers inside EPL World Championship winners rings go up in smokes as Coach Moyles and the Candies make a tie at the Goodson Candy shack, leaving Mick L.R. Teta feeling like some real sad bear cub that saw its momma go get shot by some dude in the woods

Real smart soccer player Kevin the Brain, known to EPL England fans as the Dutch Clint Dempsey, has comformized he’s gonna go hang up his Man City Franchise Club cleats in pursuit of following in his hero Dempsey by making the step up in to MLS.

The Man City Franchise Club need another of those loans they’re guys are always singing about. Lame-ass plays from Abou Diaby’s guys in Asstown.

Negative equity goalshot from the Glasgow Celtics after Kasper the friendly Goaltender goofs around and lets a real nice pass kick from USMNT’s Cameron Carter-Vickers go right on into his ball bag #ghuys

It’s even better when the other franchise think they’ll get a felony kick only to be denied.

One of THE great accounts

@usasoccerguy.bsky.social another clutch extremity-time goal insertion double for chicken tikka mo salah #freedom

Share this post if you love it when the deefence guy in your favorite franchise does a real neat depossession slide to deny the goalshot opportunity right as the overtime verdict tablet erection is made

The Soccer Chickens just handed Abou Diaby his guy’s asses with fries on the side #ComeOnYouSoccer

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As if this app couldn't get any better, Soccer Guy is here. ⚽

Hell yeah! I’m staying on this app now.

That second quarter major felony card for the Big Irish Guys has handed the victory points to the Three Lines. Ireland is getting its ass owned by the British guys which kinda sucks for the Cloverleaves 🇮🇳🇬🇪

@usasoccerguy.bsky.social kick that soccer ball! X

Hoping the Three Lines take the W, but with half of the usual side "ill" (sarcasm quotes courtesy of the HurriKane), anything could happen.

You could also do what the man says in his pinned post! bsky.app/profile/socc...

Soccerguy is on Bluesky. Hope to see some posts about the pride of Mercytown, the Evertown Soccer Candies, real soon.

With the Three Lines taking on Ireland Soccer Club at soccer, who will win at soccer? 🇬🇪🇮🇳 #SummerOf69 #ComeOnYouBigIrishGuys

Yay. soccerguy er på Bluesky. 🙌

Soccer Guy is here! Looking forward to lots of awesome Leeds Unity chat. #MovingOnTogether

OMG @soccerguy.bsky.social is here! Currently he has fewer followers than I do. That is not a logical situation. Y'all know what do to. Maybe the Hurricane and Buccaroo Soccer will join us here soon . . .

Guys it’s going to be alright! Soccer guy is here 🥰

Share this if you think Elon is a soccer douche who can’t even lace up his cleats before soccer practice

Hey there, champ. How’s the view from the top of Mount Awesome?