Sorry I just realized that Ilya coming out with Shane means he’ll never be able to visit his mother’s grave in Russia again and now I’m crying again

J.D. Vance speaking to a mostly empty CPAC ballroom in 2032:

I want to be clear about a few things regarding upcoming elections: -Anybody but Manny for District 8 -Anybody but Wiener for Congress -Anybody but Newsom for prez nominee

Any gay players on the San Jose Sharks want to capitalize on the Heated Rivalry obsession and date me publicly? Lmk

Four Non-Blondie

Julie K. Brown is a reporter for the Miami Herald who did groundbreaking work on Epstein beginning in 2018, including groundbreaking work on the disgusting coverup by Alex Acosta. Her travel itinerary was released with some of the Epstein files. It appears the DOJ was monitoring her in 2019.

Kris Jenner works hard but Yuna Hollander works harder

It’s not okay for me to be this obsessed with a television show but every 3.5 minutes for the past 6 weeks my brain randomly says in a thick Russian accent “Hollander.”

KAREN FUCKING WHEELER THE BADASS THAT YOU ARE!!!

OMG!!! OASIS IS SAVED!!! www.sfchronicle.com/entertainmen...

“She would have loved you…like I love you.”

I want to wake up to one headline and 1000 text messages.

He’s such a loser

OMG how could I forget ‘Tis the Damn Season!? 😭

Bari Weiss be like

Merry Christmas, ya filthy animal!

I thought of what we can do. Pressure Gretchen Whitner to dredge Lake Michigan until they find that baby’s body. Run every DNA test under the sun until we know what man’s baby it is and throw the book at him.

My favorite Christmas songs from the past few years: 1) Santa Tell Me -Ariana Grande 2) Merry Christmas, Please Don’t Call -Bleachers 3) Last Christmas (Cover) -Chappell Roan & Sabrina Carpenter 4) Oh Santa! -Mariah Carey, Jennifer Hudson, & Ariana Grande 5) Christmas Tree Farm -Taylor Swift

NORAD Santa tracker is Woke

It’s not left versus right. It’s tops versus bottoms.

Bari Weiss be like

This is what leftists mean when they say the Democratic Party is moving further right. If people like Conway who has not changed his conservative beliefs (but doesn’t like trump) is welcomed with open arms, but Mamdani can’t get endorsements, what do you think this says about what dems stand for?

The thing about the Epstein file redactions is…half of my friends are autistic D&D nerds, & the other half are anti-fascist drag artists. Drag shows & TTRPG sessions slow down during the holidays, leaving nerds with hyperfixations nothing else to do but uncover secrets the FBI failed to hide well.

So TikTok shop can advertise a necklace with a literal SWASTIKA but my video calling TikTok out on that gets a community guidelines violation? GOT IT.

I am a bottomless ocean of rage. Not only does this document allege that trump raped a 13 year old girl (which we knew), it also says he was there when the girl’s uncle murdered her newborn baby and dumped the body in Lake Michigan. Hell is too good for this monster and everyone protecting him.

bari weiss is in hot water, fielding accusations of both malice and incompetence, but it’s not too late for her to clear this whole thing up by sitting down for an honest, straightforward interview with isaac chotiner.

Boo this woman everywhere she goes

Any journalist who has not at least once committed reckless disregard of leadership is not to be trusted.

roll a deception check with disadvantage

Live Laugh Lie to the cops

The point is I’m smarter than the FBI.

I once had a job that occasionally involved redacting documents. I know digital redactions could be unredacted, so I would print them out, redact them by hand with a sharpie, make a photocopy, and then give the photocopy to the reporter.

if they had just shown it on 60 Minutes nobody would have seen it

60 minutes CECOT segment. Recorded through my browser. HD quality. Not phone. Spread it around. If you're press, it's yours. Go nuts. It's streaming on a Canadian website, but there is no telling for how long. www.filemail.com/d/wkcdttnacp...

!! Here’s a link to full video of the 60 Minutes segment that Bari Weiss killed last minute, via @jasonparis.bsky.social: is.gd/paU8Ko (It was uploaded to the Global TV app in Canada, seemingly by accident, and has now been taken down)

You mean to tell me I learned every word to Super Bass in 2011 for NOTHING!?

*I* have more investigative reporting experience than Bari Weiss

I will not rest until San Francisco has taken over control of the power utility.

So Bari Weiss’s first real editorial intervention at CBS is to repress coverage of American concentration camps.

Happy solstice!

I feel like I'm going to get a lot of use out of this Pluribus screencap

I highly recommend Mint Mobile for anyone trying to save money and highly discourage Mint Mobile for anyone trying to have cell service.

Very normal and fun to live in a time when I never leave home without narcan, a whistle, and gauze in case I witness an overdose, ICE, or police brutality.

Please stop forcing me to learn new information about Jake Paul

Rest in Peace, Duane. Your country failed you, but your community hasn’t stopped fighting.

67 Senators could remove RFK Jr. today but there aren’t 67 Senators who care about Americans’ lives, health, or wellbeing. Babies will die. Our leaders hate us.

Taylor: 🎵Oh my, love is a lie, shit my friends say to get me by🎵 Andrea: “Aww what a sweet love song about your new boyfriend” Taylor: 🤨