Dear anyone I’ve ever pissed off by minimizing your annoyance at the seat being up: I am deeply sorry. I finally did it. I sat in the bowl. I understand now.

Look, Dad! Hurr durr, I’m ThE cat

Mmmm… Bahthhouse lighting on a promising Slutty Sunday (is that a thing? I’m making it á thing) #gaypup #gaysocks

Sometimes you just need to jerk off inside someone’s husband while you ride him. Happy Halloween, everybody!!

I’m not a fan of Newsom and his mealy-mouthed support of the queer community, but we desperately need more pols like him and Pritzker; willing to engage with this regime in direct and forceful language. We fought a whole war about despots forcing their will on the people once. We can do it again.

And thanks to humidity not being a thing, I CAN WEAR JEANS AGAIN. I feel bad for you, little queer people in my phone. I’m gonna be a MENACE in LA weather 😆😆

Happy #ThongThursday, y'all. I resisted for the longest time, but figured I couldn't make fun of thongs until I tried them. I, uh. I have feelings. #Gaypup #malefeet #gayotter

Unexpected breakup perk: I fit EVERYTHING he left behind now 😈

Me: Hmmm... 10AM is a little early for a beer. Also Me: Wait. Teeeeechnicalllly. my body is still on EST. Airport rules still apply until I fully acclimate to LA time..

Ok, I couldn’t just put myself out here all Grizzly Adams and *not* show you that I am, in fact, a Civilized Person™️. Oh, and happy #Locktober 7th! (I promise the last pic was a cleaning break)

For #TummyTuesday, I wanted to pat myself on the back. After COVID, I was heavier than I’d ever been, miserable, out of breath, and with a sex drive that was all but dead. 5 years later, down to a weight I haven’t seen since Obama wore a tan suit. I’m so thankful for the help and support I had.❤️

Figures the one time I have my apartment to myself no one wants to bate 😭

Not the TSA agent patting me down, looking at my collar and saying, “Locktober?” 🤣

Getting ready to settle in for a night of heavy gooning before my first #Locktober. Gotta send the lil guy off with a bang, y’know?

I'm sorry in advance for how my room is going to smell... Gonna try Locktober this year, so I'm taking FULL advantage of the next 7 days of access to my peener. Granted, I'm cheating because I hold my own keys, but still.

I’d like a bro to just snifffffff rn

I meaaaan, there are a nonzero number of my friends who know that if I don't cum I'm gonna be a prick until someone pushes me against the wall in the bathroom and forcibly extracts it. There's also a nonzero number of my friends for whom I just... wouldn't stop. It's just my dick

On this fine, 3rd #MonochromeMonday, I hope your work day is as easy as I am.

The furry who invents an infinite scroll app for e621 will be a billionaire

Anyone else ever accidentally bate themselves into hypoglycemia? No? Just me? In other news, I’m now pretty sure I know what it’s like to ride in a tumble dryer

Tapping the sign.

A very close friend is having top surgery this week, so to celebrate we’re throwing a Yeet the Teats party. I now see why everyone calls millennials so deeply unserious 🤣

Is a pair of soles on my face to goon to too much to ask??

Well, it’s official! My mom is finally well enough that I can finally move into the apartment I’ve been paying for, for the last year 🤣🤣. The movers have already pulled all my stuff from storage and in a few more weeks I can finally enjoy LA! Left coast, prepare your sphincter!

I ate half a loaf of crusty bread and butter for dinner. Fall is coming

CPB? Fucking really‽ We, as the kids say, are cooked.

Sorry that I liked 31 of your posts, it’s just that I really want to fuck you

You call me after hours, this is the sysadmin you’re getting #gaypup #sysadmin

Garbage day is Tuesday in my town. I can’t describe why, but it’s always struck me as weird

Oh lordt. The new South Park.. Def a return to form

On sight

I love that on Day 1 of my new job, I got no less than *SIX* recruiter calls.

Well that sucks. Just got a call; the only raffle I've ever won I actually don't qualify for because I'm single 😭 😅

Holy FUCK. Go watch Straw. Now.

New favorite text ever

I always saw the "Free Mom Hugs" folks and thought, "oh. Well that's really nice of them." until today. Went to a "pride" thing in Wilmington (it's in quotes because there isn't a pride, per se) and I just SOBBED into this random woman's arms. Thanks, free mom hugs people.

Rubble "Seconds From Disaster," 2025 Digital Photo Edition 1/🕳️ $Jus,tco,meg,eth.im

"how do you get things from not US YouTube given where Minnesota is located" okay you need a VPN and you just need to connect to a country where *nobody* has the broadcast rights to Eurovision (Canada is your natural first choice)

The Grey Gardens remake (2009) is surprisingly good! I didn't have many expectations, but it managed to exceed all of them

I bet if you make it with milk it's amazing...

the new york sewer rats have finally elected a new rat pope

Damnit I have no one to talk about All Stars with 😭😭 Bosco is back!!!

Why aren't more people talking about Jazmine Sullivan? Ho Tales, Mo Tales should be required listening for all gueers

Guess my collar was gross 😬

If you can, please donate. If you cannot, please share. tiltify.com/+iml-class-4...

Repost if you want to taste daddy 😈

the state of utah made it illegal to fly "unofficial" flags at public schools, universities, and government buildings, effectively banning pride flag displays. so salt lake city approved 3 new official city flags celebrating minority communities. love this energy.