Stores are selling out of rape whistles, and people are paying nannies, cleaning ladies and lawn care guys to stay home if anyone wants to know how it's going in Chicago. Fuck DJT.

Dainty Rosie in the morning

You guys, it's apparently within ICE's purview to body slam you to the ground if you're mean to them. Not great. @govpritzker.illinois.gov @durbin.senate.gov @duckworth.senate.gov @schakowsky.house.gov

I was reluctant to do this interview, because I wasn’t sure of the ask, and also had to come in two hours early and I’m lazy AF. But now I have the shop on film for posterity, and my future grandkids will see their Kookaburra Grandma in action!

WATCH: "They are underwater across the board, and they know it. And that is causing them to double down in public. But it is backfiring. That is why—whether it's a shutdown, whether it's all of this—they want us to blink first. And we have too much to save," says AOC.

Calling all hippie chicks outrageous sale going on rn at Three Bird Nest...

TFW the capitalist algorithm plays me like a fiddle

Puppy wanted to party at 5 am. Got both dogs fed, walked, and (thought) tired out enough to leave them sleeping downstairs while I snuck up for a nap. Exactly 1 minute later:

Per usual, John Oliver distills the Kimmel thing down beautifully. Well worth a watch:

Hakeem Jeffries: No to Zohan Mamdani; yes to Charlie Kirk. Dems: Why are donations drying up?

They say a physical letter sent to a corporation is worth a thousand social media comments; Disney-ABC Home Entertainment and Television Distribution 500 S. Buena Vista St. Burbank, CA 91521-3515

They want us to feel afraid. Fear makes us censor ourselves, stay quiet, keep our heads down. I get it; it's scary. But do not do the work of the oppressor for them. The more we speak out, the more we work in community, the less power they have. Don't let the right use fear as a wedge & cudgel.

wow

Bleak times call for a Peggy-O marathon.

Gun advocate gets shot under banner reading “Prove Me Wrong“; Pundits Search for Meaning

It me, solo doing the dinner dishes, listening out of the blue to Enya, and getting a l’il…misty eyed? What a world, what a world.

At pharmacy getting my Covid vax. Guy at desk shoves a paper in front of me and says “if you’re under 65, you have to have one of these cond—“ I cut him off and said “Yeah I have All those things.” He smiled and said, “Oh no!” Now I’m vaxxed, relaxed, and gonna eat tacos.

Had a dream last night that Trey brought a smokin’ hot show to a screeching halt with a dead serious rendition of the Eagles’ Desperado, vibrato and all. Everyone was trying to be cool about it, but it was…not great.

Unbridled Asshat threatens my hometown with military occupation. Fuck this guy and everyone who voted for him.

Just signed up to get all the vaccines this Sunday. RFK Junior, get fucked.

We used to call this stupidity. There were smart people and stupid people and we let the smart people do the things they were good at and the stupid people were taken care of and didn't need to worry about what the smart people were doing. But now we let the stupid people think they're smart.

Chicago: if Mango sends troops to Chi, do we throw Italian Beef or Deep Dish?

Make it stop

Hot tip for those scrolling the remote control, bonus slightly high: Anthony Bourdain: Parts Unknown S2 E2–Spain episode on Hulu. Food porn/eye candy bordering on the majestic.

There’s a shitload of MAGA on Fishman’s FB page. It’s such wonder to me.

2025 Persons of the Year: Pierogi and Hoagie guys

Alan Dershowitz Sues Farmers Market Vendor For Refusing To Sell Him Child

Is this…is this because Big Balls got his ass kicked in DC?

Rosie

100% convinced on Gizz. Wowza.

Even Jerry (who can be kind of a dick) can’t resist Rosie‘s cuteness and is giving her the college try. #Winning

I fucking did it! Meet Rosie McGee, our new Muppet Babee!

Got the hubs *just* drunk enough to agree to another dog. Need some female energy around this sausage fest. Bella is the front runner,,,Ouisie a close second.

Jerry Larry Gary Gergich Garcia

Today is a great day to phone your two Senators, and your Rep in the House, and tell them to find a camera and say they are against starving babies and children to death as a by-product of war.

Yesterday in Shoo-ta-noofie Doopie-Poopie

Fomo for Phish in my hometown tonight, but getting to be wheels up for France at setbreak eases the sting. Have fun, all!

Dinner’s not for another half hour. I’ll just pop over to Petfinder and take a peaksy OH MY CHRIST ON A CRACKER!!!

When Rubin played on his painted mandolin The breeze would pause to listen in Before going its way again Such a pretty lyric.

Why the fuck is the National Guard in L.A. and not in TX?

Hoka needs to STOP. I’m a mere mortal with shitty knees!

Good news for something new and different

Apparently, I'm only impervious to Insta advertising the first 17 times. At 18, I'm weak and lack self-control.

Stanning Rick Steves not on my bingo card, etc etc.

One of the great joys of parenthood is getting to dress your kid. One of the darkest days is when they don’t let you any more and dress like doofuses. But there will always be the bacon n’ eggs shirt.

Good going, NYC.

Way cool that bc 33% of the country voted for Trump, we are now at war with Iran. A country which 98% of the American populous couldn’t finger on a map, including myself, on pain of death.

First glass of Vernaccia in Firenze; Phish representing.

Fascism in America will manifest as a series of atrocities viewed through phones with footage that gets closer and closer to where you live until there's a pounding on your door.

Walked by many churches on my dog walk yesterday, all with giant crosses on the steeple, as in, here’s where we murdered our head guy, nailing his body to a cross just like this! Which we now wear on gold chains! I guess we’re lucky guillotines weren’t around yet, or AR-15s. Religion is weird.