See you in six months.

My dad was in a motorbike accident a few months ago. He spent several days in a coma, broke 23 bones, two punctured lungs, several brain bleeds, kidney and liver damage. He ran Park Run today faster than I can 😐

It might be a long afternoon.

Youngest is with me in the shop. Asks for some PL trading cards, which I buy for him. Home for less than 5 minutes before the Mrs is sorting them by team.

There's plenty of money within football to ensure nothing like this ever happens again. Let's hope the organisations with the power and money to help actually do so, rather than just howling in press conferences how awful it is.

Solved this by scrapping it and purchasing the bigger, faster, mid-life crisis car. Thanks for your support.

Never mind. Standard disclaimer that Ticketmaster sucks.

BRB while I remortgage the house for System Of A Down tickets.

I'd be very interested to see a decent consumer rights lawyer take a pop at the National League's bizarre stance that season tickets aren't valid for the rearranged Eastleigh V Scunthorpe game.

Me, spotting the FBI Director's tie.

Car broke down today. Side of the road for about 25 minutes. Quite inconvenient location, hazards on, head on hands, full works. Not a single person had the decency to shout "you can't park there mate" at me. Country's gone.

Fit & proper wasn’t fit for purpose, so we tried OADT…but that was pretty toothless, too. So, here comes the ODSE regime…an acronym to strike terror into the hearts of rubbish football club owners everywhere. Flunk the test; lose your club! www.nytimes.com/athletic/659...

This morning’s breakfast conversation, ahead of the first day back at school: Eldest - “Daddy, why can we jump?” Me - “….”

Me, remembering that Grimsby beat Man Utd

One of the more entertaining aspects of that shootout, I think, is that they didn't have penalty history on their water bottles. I'd be banning that.. unless it's England.

I'm fucking devastated Roy Keane isn't the pundit.

one of their greatest humiliations *so far*

Sean Dyche sat by the phone waiting for Jim Ratcliffe's call.

I'm properly delighted for Grimsby. Had some great trips there and met some excellent people.

Man Utd's net spend this summer: £207m

Spoilsports

This is delaying my viewing of Alien:Earth and I'm ok with that.

"Nothing is achieved alone", the banner says, with an advert for the sovereign wealth fund of Saudi Arabia displayed immediately below. A more perfect photo could not possibly have been taken. bsky.app/profile/geor...

I hate football. Stupid bloody sport.

Having a bad day? Struggling in any capacity? I hope you find whatever strength you need and you remember Andy Pilley is in prison, which is very, very funny.

"Yes the defender has bodyslammed him into the floor. Goldberg would be proud of it. You might need to look at the VAR." "How dare you lightly brush past me while I was walking backwards and not looking where I was going! How can I score from 12 yards now?"

Make no mistake, I am an awful, awful footballer. Whenever I "played" at school, summer holidays, Leisure Leagues, whatever,I was horrendous in every single respect. But I guarantee I can take a better penalty than that.

One of the greatest quiz questions in sport ruined by the opening of Everton's new stadium. "Which football ground is closest to the River Mersey?"

Everton v Brighton kit clash is a crime against football. Thank you for attending my TED talk.

That's quite the banner deployed by Crystal Palace fans in honour of Evangelos Marinakis. I could do with some legal advice here, before I go any further.

Arsenal. If you're 4-0 up at home, you've brought on the second youngest player in the club's history, and he wins a penalty in the 95th minute, let the lad take the pen ffs 🤣

Little known fact: Did you know Wrexham are owned by Hollywood actors? No-one ever mentions it.

Oh my GOD

I knew this would be boss when I saw it, and that was before I realised there was an article already on the site about the absolutely legendary Transport Tycoon.

“Thanks Panjab!” *4 seconds later* “What the fuck Panjab?”

I do find it quite strange that *checks notes* 16 hours after the takeover of Morecambe Panjab Warriors still haven't issued any sort of statement... Then again I bet they’re discovering some cracking skeletons in that particular closet.

I have never ever been desperate to hear the thoughts of any player at half time, of any game I’ve ever watched. Stfu and let Roy Keane tell me it’s his job.

Is that a Union Jack with different colours I see?

1) How it started 2) How it’s going

If there are any freelancers out there who know Adobe Illustrator, and could help ASAP with a fairly simple logo fix for a reasonable rate, please do send me a DM. Logo exists as a .ai, I've messed it up. Fairly simple fix I'd imagine for someone who knows what they're doing. (Non AL3 related)

A good friend pointed out to me this morning that Worcester Warriors are rebuilding, and the name of their new CEO is... rather unfortunate.

Seen a lot of "Why can't Tyson Fury / The Premier League / One week of Casemeiro's wages / whatever save Morecambe?" Because the issue isn't, in itself, the debt Morecambe are in. The issue is the shithole chancer that's holding the club hostage.

Update since this thread: I've accidentally deleted about 5,000 Southend matches and I'm that fuming it's close to all going in the bin so I can start from scratch.

The 4yo has insisted that after tea I help him craft a “measuring plate”. I’m now desperately trying to figure out what a measuring plate might be.