It’s my daughter’s birthday, which means it’s also @pftompkins.bsky.social as well! Happy birthday to them both!

Thoughts and prayers for the Aston Martin #F1 mechanics who stayed up working until 1am to rebuild Stroll’s car that he promptly sent right back into the wall in the beginning of Q1.

I’m truly ruining #hungergames for my kids. Every time someone says “Peeta,” I say it in a Lois Griffin voice.

#jasonmendoza #thegoodplace #mannyjacinto

WHAT?!? MAX IS UNHINGED! #f1

Hulkenberg- #DOTD

The Witcher: “We love all the races in our world! We have humans, humans who are short, and humans who have slightly different ears!” Elder Scrolls: “Ok, what if Chester Cheetah was Slavic and came from the desert? WAIT, let’s do lizards, too!!” #thewitcher #elderscrolls #oblivion #skyrim

The VW to BMW to Porsche pipeline is no joke.

Hey, @evilmopacatx.bsky.social when your mom (the cement truck) is mad at you, does she call you Missouri-Pacific Loop 1 Expressway?

“You want me to let him past as well??” THE LOUDEST I’VE EVER CACKLED DURING A RACE. #f1 #miamigp

I don’t know why Charles is complaining now. He wasn’t gaining any time on Kimi, but Lewis has, and will definitely get within striking distance. #f1 #miamigp

Using my dad voice at the TV to tell Ocon to leave Lewis space. #f1 #miamigp

We’re not trusting George to report on rain anymore, are we? #f1 #miamigp

Colgate is Chevy and Crest is Ford. No, I will not elaborate.

So, Max passed off the track, right? He’s got to let Oscar through. #F1

This thread has made me realize that I don’t get hung up on band names at all. Of course I realize that some band names are stupid, but it won’t keep me from listening to them.

Someone tell me I’m not the only one who can’t stop saying “calamitous ORTBO.” #severance

CARLOOOOOS! #F1 #smoothoperator

Filosofia de muro

Asked my wife if she wanted a protein shot* in her smoothie** this morning. *bacon crumbles **cheesy grits

“You’d be wise to watch yourself. This discotheque is protected by a powerful sorceress.” “Ah, yes. The legendary Yennefer of Vengaboys.”

What’s the most polite way to publicly eat the crispies in the bottom of the Long John Silvers tray? Please hurry, this is a time sensitive matter.

So we’re watching #ChristmasVacation, and when Doris Roberts’ character comes onscreen, both kids shout, “CHAPPEL ROAN!”

MARIAH

*confusing my football watch party guests by pronouncing CBS “sea bass.”*

Where is the #F1 community here? My family didn’t get up for the race, and I get the sense that my dogs don’t fully appreciate how spot on my commentary is.

Has anyone watched #gardenstate recently? Does it hold up (use of R-slur notwithstanding)? I’m listening to the objectively great soundtrack and remembering how much it resonated with me as a struggling artist back then.

It’s once again time for America’s favorite snack: enough fun size candy bars to equal a full size bar.

Ok, it seems that this last migration caught me in the wave. I haven’t deleted twitter yet, but I moved the Bluesky icon into its prime spot on my phone!

Bluesky’s playing hard to get (with invite codes to join) is definitely the better move. #threads is begging me to join in my IG feed and I have absolutely no desire.