my stream froze which was stressful but it allowed me to capture this beautiful moment when Ashley realized she was going to win #BB27 and Morgan realized she was going to lose beautifully played thank you for your service queens <3

my periodontist told me that my gum surgery should stop the recession … so fingers crossed 🤞

thank GOD that canary finally shut up!! ok fellas, now let’s go around the room and say our favorite things about the coal mine <3

WHEN will the mainstream media finally SPEAK UP about CRASH (Deluxe) HMMMMM???? WHY are they SO scared??? WHAT are they HIDING from us!!!! #conspiracy #thetruthALWAYSprevails #factsdontcareaboutyourfeelings

best part of special forces: world’s toughest test season 3 so far is this cute little Juliette window all the staff yell out of to make announcements. incredibly girly pop to do this 💕

I promise yall can delete Facebook/instagram/tiktok/X and survive. Sometimes you’ll be bored and out of the loop but you won’t be psychologically targeted to increase engagement by any means necessary, even those that cause you emotional harm. Being bored is better trust and believe!!

hey freaks great news - eyelash glue is a perfect quick curing adhesive for miniatures

been watching a lot of restock videos and I’m just gonna be honest I don’t think yall are using that much honey … fake ass

James Gunn u better not say or do anything stupid I’m gonna be so mad. I’m really starting to like u and ur art and if you say or do anything stupid it’s gonna really disappoint me!!

not to be controversial but I think smart phones might actually be making us dumber… like if u agree

thx @hankgreen.bsky.social he’s just like me fr

new dream job just dropped: QA/QC for ghost hunting equipment but I’m only testing the control group

fuck bill Maher but he’d be great mo cap for Papa Smurf

if u buy this type of shirt ur mad dumb. this shirt is absolutely no one’s personal style. it exists only as a litmus test for an individual’s capacity to be easily influenced.

told my only slightly younger than me coworker today “you catch more flies with honey than you do with vinegar” and she really agreed but also when I’m thinking back on it now it sorta seemed like the first time she’d ever heard the phrase

ok yall hear me out… maybe Bernie can still win

what we really need is a good guy with a highly convoluted plan and access to medieval torture devices to come in and save the day

sometimes I try to run up and down the stairs instead of walking just in case I decide I might wanna be a firefighter later

no reason for a just dance song to have this much story. absolutely frothing at the mouth to know more about Ms Purple Swan Single Mom and Mr Mysterious Steampunk Hype Man youtu.be/QHdhUDAN61g?...

ok I think it’s time to regulate podcast appearances by government officials

happy 2025th birthday america 🇺🇸🦅🌭

wore this shirt to the airport and the tsa agent went out of his way to say “I disagree with you. I disagree with your shirt” which was cool and definitely made me feel safer. Thanks so much for your hard work tsa! More of you and less of flight controllers please 🙏

prison guards: “let’s put people in solitary cells with no entertainment or natural lighting for 23 hours a day and make them strip naked every time they go in and out” also prison guards: “what do you mean they’re not mentally stable? after we explicitly designed literally everything for that?”

so anyways what did everyone ask lady gaga to get them for pride month???

i have to take eye drops every night for high eye pressure which is fucked up bc it was hard enough for me to make peace with the skeleton inside of me like what do you mean i have to confront the tethered flesh orbs for seeing each and every evening ??

does anyone know if carbon fiber would be a good hull material for a manned submersible? not sure if it’s been tested yet but seems plausible

an advisor spotting a cognitive issue with trump is like a child spotting that a fire truck is red

if u can’t handle me at my falling out of a coconut tree u don’t deserve me at my existing in the context of all in which i live and what came before me 💯💯💯

can’t stop thinking about those tubes they stick into cows to let out all of the gases in their stomach(s). Wish it was me fr.

I’m looking at you @mcuban.bsky.social pls advocate for rich ppl to pay their fair share of taxes it literally means nothing coming from me (you should google what percentage of income goes to taxes for poor ppl if u aren’t sure. Im assuming u do but then why would u be the way u are so who knows)

crypto growing in popularity is just bc wealthy people are getting bored of hoarding regular, poor people money and moving onto digital, rich people money

if I die young, bury me in cicis apple pie dessert pizza lay me down in a bed of cicis apple pie dessert pizza

“the British are doing WHAT?” (paul revere thinking he was about to have a whole different evening)

weird but ok

Sinners is a perfect movie and if you disagree you better not

if Southwest Airlines open seating policy has no haters, I’m dead

2 Godzilla 2 Minus One

not to be dramatic but where the FUCK is god when im scared

it’s 2025 lets be honest with ourselves! for example instead of saying “you can get more done with a phone call” try saying “I’m scared of reading and writing” or “I’m asking you to do something that I don’t want a written record of” follow for more cool tips😇

maybe this is narrow minded of me but if the first story of your book is that women are evil and the worst thing men can do is love them it’s gonna be DNF for sure

noooooo don’t send a well formatted and concise email that accurately conveys the subject at hand with a healthy level of objectivity!!! you’ll scare the neurotypicals!!

if you wear a seatbelt it means you don’t trust God’s will

White lotus season 3 but we only see what Victoria is doing

I don’t pay for ad free YouTube which is why I have a personal vendetta against lemonade pet insurance

mark why are you out here calling this like a draftkings bet ppl are actually fucking dying

@adamconover.net dont be mad please but have you thought about this / do you feel seen by Lewis in meet the robinsons (2007)

girls go to college to get more knowledge boys try to colonize mars and are really fucking stupid

has anyone called him mark suckerberg before or am I the first just now