not now kitten, daddy’s overstimulated

i missed doing picrews

This picture was taken in 2000 by an Associated Press photographer who was allowed to be present as an observer. ICE now keeps press blocks away from the areas where they are operating. One of the first actions ICE takes during a raid is to confiscate phones.

guy who says “exsqueeeze me” in a jar jar binks voice every time he farts

i wish i had nuts so i could do some newton's cradle shit with em

i just realized i’m halfway through a 10 year supply of body spray i bought when i was 19

stolen from the skyline 👁️👁️

sometimes it sucks talking to people about my eating habits because it sounds like i have an eating disorder but it’s actually just that my stomach is paralyzed

if gandalf could summon a giant eagle anytime he wanted why didn’t he just fly the ring to mount doom in the first place

Wordle 1,670 2/6 🟨⬛🟨⬛🟨 🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩

i think realizing i was autistic did wonders for my self esteem. like im not a fuckup i’m just different

i had a dream last night that i grew a t dick and immediately started jacking off but when i came i ejaculated a bunch of ketchup

ladies, if you look like this hmu

ngl sometimes i slightly miss how stupid tw*tter was. i once saw someone getting canceled for drinking starbucks and they said “i don’t participate in performative stuff like boycotts i do real effective things like retweeting infographics and gofundme’s”

“twitter is greening out for dan and phil” damn i should have taken more edibles last night

you may not like it but this is what peak looks like

*walking up to a gay couple* so which one of you is the dan and which one of you is the phil?

on tw*tter i was known for “artist’s renditions” where someone would give me something to draw and i would draw it badly on purpose and it was genuinely so fun here are some that i kept saved

i’m on the verge of getting into a physical altercation at the las vegas airport

why does this billboard make me feel like i need to file a restraining order against wendy’s

Wordle 1,659 3/6 ⬛⬛🟨⬛🟨 🟩🟨🟨🟨🟩 🟩🟩🟩🟩🟩 i got so lucky with this one omg

my boyfriend has baby fever 😭

jan #promosky ☆ nat ☆ they/she ☆ queer, bi, nonbinary i talk about: • my life/personal stuff • dan and phil • boygenius + solos • alt music • my bf • books and movies occasionally • knitting • outfits/fashion ‼️ MDNI 🧶 more: rentry.co/shrimpgirlfriend

my 2026 resolution is to get on hrt

2025 year recap jan - rednote and camping feb - haircut mar - marcus the worm april - grad school stress may - spent time with sibling jun - new york jul - new cat :) aug - AHHHHHHH sep - ugfbgggNNNGHHHH oct - phan is real nov - HNGGGNNNNGH dec - NNMNGGGHchistmas :)

admission to 2026 has now closed. if you are not currently in 2026 you will be left behind

If you haven’t yet, go watch Pluribus. That show has a lesbian main character and doesn’t have queerbaiting, it’s veeery good.

i am so on board with neopronouns but icl i don’t know how to use a lot of them

it is wednesday my dudes

i need to hire someone to stop me from cooking up new projects ever five days

my bf is trying to blame himself saying he didn’t adequately prepare his parents to meet me so they were apprehensive like okay??? the first time he showed his mom a picture of me she said “you can do better” buddy no amount of apprehension justifies that. it’s just rude.

how it feels when i post

my bfs mom make the most delicious food but it’s so oily 😭😭😭 please my stomach is dying for a vegetable

autism is stored in the voluptuous ass

i hope, at the very least, most of you 🏴‍☠️ ST instead of having a netflix subscription. i'd be livid too if i had paid whatever a netflix subscription costs now and then that shit happens

how it feels not being a stranger things fan rn

danisnotonfire how i’ve missed you

merry christmas and happy holidays to all the gay people in my phone

🚨🚨TACO BELL BROUGHT BACK THEIR QUESORITO 🚨🚨

i love trans people. wdym your name is coin

the news tonight was playing some cutsie christmas video while doomsday headlines scrolled through the bottom. we live in some times.

cat sitter just sent me this and said they must’ve had a bit of “holiday fun” lmfaooooo

Tinsel-y vagina cave to you to

If you know anyone in the Nashville area that is an immigrant tell them to be careful these next few days. I can’t say too much but my town was a rest stop not a raid and the closest big city is Nashville. I’m not 100% sure if that’s the destination but considering the interstate here it makes sense