This just popped out of nowhere, like I turned around and it had materialized on my desk. 1) what did I buy that came with this and b) why do I need a microscope to read it

🎂 I could write a lot about whatever "big" 35 is, the breaking down how I felt about the change over time yesterday, how I feel about it today, but you don't wanna read it and I just bought myself a project so that's what I'm gonna do. A set of drawers for next to the desk, ~fancy~

(I still exist, I'm just hidin' from life and doing work and playing games)

Revolutionary new toys from artisans with deep investments into modeling and it's just stuff you find on Amazon. Not linking anything, I don't want the heat, just don't be taken by nonsense. Most of it has the maker mark too. I follow the am shop and recognize these immediately.

Mom sent me her adventure in washing her critters today and it put the biggest smile on my face. I also need to make more frogs and stuff for my niblings - my nephew likes Mom's frog a ton - it's just been a tiring year.

20% OFF *all* of our handmade toys, all weekend! Customs, ready-mades, random pours - if we made it, it's on sale. Discount is automatic and reflected in the cart, no need to remember a code! uberrime.com/collections

Went to Lover's Lane for a basic bullet vibe for... bugs, sifting bugs, and there were two Fascinus left and they looked lonely so I got one. Keep Cthulhu company until my Bjarg (which you HAVE seen) arrives.

Sitting in my car charging my phone. Lost power just before 10pm last night - can't sleep without white noise (a fan - also loud 9-12" fan recommendations please), been awake for 27 hours since I woke up yesterday at 4am. The problem is the box in our back yard. Knocked out 5 blocks. From us.

Aboris! My big-chin-lizard-man-that's-definitely-not-from-that-game Mine's in small (I'm small it's okay), uberrime.com/products/the...

My small Raiju, jade shift and translucent (and as always, your camera never sees translucency the way you do) I got so much today and there are so many pictures and I cannot overload your feed with all of it. uberrime.com/products/the...

I might die It's okay.

Happy Halloween! To celebrate, we're dropping our coolest model yet: Cthulhu! @excelddesigns.bsky.social put a lot of love into the details of this winged eldritch monster. The Cthulhu Dildo comes in 3 sizes, customizable in your choice of firmness and 1-3 colors: uberrime.com/collections/...

Implying digital sculpture isn't real art and then using generative AI is pretty funny.

It's Friday, which means we have another NEW RELEASE! The Symbiont Long Biomechanical Dildo comes in 3 tall, slender sizes. Fleshy, veiny alien textures and mecha ridges make this one of our weirdest looking toys. A fitting release for the end of October! uberrime.com/products/the...

I'm gonna dirty delete that. Here's the thing: objectively, my internals look picture perfect for a diagram of typical stuff in a medical setting. But they cause me an immense amount of trouble. That's it. That's the thing. I'm dealing with a great deal of dissonance as a result of it.

New week, NEW MODEL! We're adding to our dragon horde with the Arboris Tree Dragon, a thick and textured design with a slanted head. And when we say thick, we mean it! Make sure to read the measurements. Available in 3 sizes, in your choice of density and 1-3 colors: uberrime.com/collections/...

Our newest fantasy model: Faeles! This ultra-detailed @excelddesigns.bsky.social model is textured from tapered tip to fur-detailed base. You can visit Faeles's magic shop as long as you don't touch the wax-sealed scrolls by the counter... uberrime.com/a/search?q=f...

NEW! The Atlan Biomechanical Dildo, another unique fantasy design from the creative mind of @excelddesigns.bsky.social! This curved, aesthetically textured model is semi-phallic in shape with an intricately detailed base. Custom in your choice of density & 1-3 colors: uberrime.com/collections/...

Hey there groovy peeps! This toy, designed by @excelddesigns.bsky.social an original DA design is pretty Damn popular, so I made another size, ehh, Medium! A DAMN ALIEN - Medium Size is now a thing. Not too big, not too small, perfect if you want just a bit of girth from outta this world... 😝

Finally, Cholla is now available in M, L, L "Thick" and XL. Find it here: 0f64f6-8c.myshopify.com/products/cho... Beautiful sculpt by @excelddesigns.bsky.social

Look familiar? These are the dildo size variants of our most popular vag plugs. I used several coats of primer, then a matte finish acrylic paint so the resulting toy will be slightly matte. Not silky lube hog matte, just slightly. Keep an eye out! I'm trying to get them done. Be excellent! Marco

I am actually so tired.

I work in adult retail and I needed a quick way to at least capture customer attention while they buy lube. So, with deep thanks to everyone who's already done the work, I've made a very bare bones flyer designed to be printed and handed out.

Our new Minima set, in our Ready Made rainbow assortment! "Ready Made" are toys that are already made and ready to ship. uberrime.com/collections/... The Minima are a collection of finger-sized dildos that we designed to offer a variety of sensations through shallow penetration.

I'm just sayin'

Some designs, sites.google.com/view/exceldd...

Our "Pride Banner" Toys are Live! These are available to enter until July 1st, 2025 @ 11:00AM MST Entries are $10 and you could walk away with a of a kind products all for a good cause! 🏳️‍🌈100% of proceeds go to WyomingEquality🏳️‍🌈 Click here to Enter! shop.xenocat-artifacts.com/collections/...

Happy *quiet, chill* Pride.

The Lunaris Werewolf Knot Dildo is one of our new Phantasia beginner-friendly fantasy toys. Lunaris's knot is sleek and oblong/ovular, making it easier to take than traditional bulbous knots. Find Lunaris and our other new toys in 2 sizes: uberrime.com/collections/...

I had free rein on designing these and it was such a blessing 😊 We decided to use the revision of my old "Above Average Alien" from the DamnAverage days, but everything else was just "I want to do this" hahaha I'm so happy, everyone did marvelously. And look at the Equus, it's like cake!

🐉🧛👽🦄🐙🐺 Soon.

It was never "just colors," but a pattern of behavior. This same behavior, although this time feels far more egregious.

If you haven't seen this teaser image of our upcoming fantasy toy line, you aren't subscribed to our email list! Find the sign-up at the bottom of any page on our site uberrime.com In exchange for letting me into your inbox a few times a month, you'll get a one time coupon code for 10% off.

Reaction to big-chin lizardmen: why does your face look like that. ...wait, actually you're kinda smoochable. What else of yours is smoochable? 👀

I'm working on a large and a small Sensi, and a slightly revised version of the OG. The prints are done and I'll start making molds on Monday. Our single most popular toy will have more sizes to choose from. The original sculpt was done by hand, doing sizes in 3D is my jam. Be excellent, Marco

🎂

Happy Friday! To help make some space on our shelves (where toys left over from conventions, old Etsy listings, etc, have been sitting) we're now offering Discounted Dildo Grab Bags! Pick a bag, any bag - seriously, you get to pick which one! uberrime.com/collections/...

This Snowman doesn’t have a corncob pipe, but we don’t think you’ll mind! The quite girthy Frosty the Happy-To-See-You Snowman is here from a winter wonderland for a limited time only. uberrime.com/products/the...

FB tells me I was sculpting this dude 13 years ago.

Do you ever feel like you want something a little more...ordinary? This week we're bringing you a line-up of pretty straight forward toys. Our Ordinary Fellas are joining the shop on Black Friday! Like the sparkly colors of fantasy toys, but prefer a more tame shape? We gotchu!

[incomprehensible screaming]

Artsy folks, can you comment here? I have not had a community, or small group of friends pretending to be a community, related specifically to art for over a decade. I would like to collect you like Pokemon on my doodle account ( @damnsheep.bsky.social ). Need community. TYVM ❤️

What's better than one dragon? 🔥🐉Four dragons.🐉🔥 Join us on 11/19 for our Year-End of the Dragon with four brand new models: Tsuna, Zahhard, Arok, and Pendragon! Read on for more details on these dragonic gems!

Called back, got my Feb surgery and pre-op appointments set. Glad they've got updated fasting recommendations, 'cause some places are like "don't even drink water within 12 hours" which is BS. I will hydrate up to that 2 hour mark. Also also: drink water.

The Mr. Rogers advice for moments of crisis is a useful thing to remember right now. Look for the helpers. Look for the people organizing to protect the most vulnerable. Look for the people who have been concretely planning for how to respond, and are ready to implement. Join them, if you can.

Caramel apple the size of my bizarre gourd's head

Got to watch my TVUS and my body is delightfully horrifying