Good morning and thank god it's Friday and all the rest.

You shouldn't share screenshots of Madonna's Grindr messages. She might be DL.

Nose gear collapse? Get this plane to rehab, stat.

Post an album you've listened to 100 times

Those cameras in meeting rooms that follow you around the room should be banned. I could have gone through life blissfully unaware that I have the posture and side profile of a gargoyle.

I ordered two books to take on holiday but clicked the wrong delivery option so they probably won't actually arrive until I'm gone. Terrible! Am I going to have to read one of the many books I own but haven't read instead?

That Cornetto jingle is not a strong start to #Susanalbumsummer

The new EHRC Code of Practice is not fit for purpose. It does not provide clear guidance or do enough to protect everyone from discrimination, and it is not compatible with longstanding British values. @EdDavey.LibDems.org.uk and @MarieCGoldman.bsky.social have written to Bridget Phillipson. ⬇️

Normalise shouting "he's behind you!" at productions of 'Waiting for Godot'.

Is all the cardboard, paper maché and chipboard on Interior Design Masters this year a recession indicator?

What inspired me to walk the length of a half marathon on the hottest day of the year so far?

I'm not crying, I've just got sunscreen in my eyes.

"Whenever I drink water, I always feel like I'm missing out on something." I really enjoyed 'The End of the Rainbow'. Funny and moving, and (goes without saying really) Jinkx Monsoon makes a good Judy.

If only I could turn back time... (I'm aware this only works for those familiar with their contribution to the soundtrack of the 1998 Gwyneth Paltrow vehicle 'Sliding Doors'.)

My friend just said, with all sincerity, "Liza Minnelli sings??" Is this not on the curriculum?

Do you ever pause mid-shave and consider an alternate life as a burger restauranteur and father-of-three?

Slightly increase a band Some Doubt

Polling day just hasn't been the same for me since I moved away from the actual Tudor mansion-cum-polling station in Salford.

This was an utter delight. Possibly the most impressive puppetry I've seen on stage, possibly just magic. It's hard to know.

I went to the new V&A East yesterday. The main exhibition has a very wide scope. I liked this guide to squatting on display on the second floor.

Some good news from the government (rare). More like this, please.

We're so back

Is the answer, very obviously, toil?

Do we all share too much of ourselves online? Yes, but on the flip side, it's cool that I can see what songs I was listening to as a moody teenager on my long abandoned last fm account.

Lift selfie, as is customary.

"Three young Barn Owls looking out of the quatrefoil of a church in North Norfolk."

A series of terrible life choices have led to me being mortally hungover on the most gloriously sunny day of the year so far.

Algorithms are such simple creatures. I bought a pair of corduroy trousers once and now Vinted loves to show me more corduroy trousers. But I don't need more corduroy trousers! I need something that goes with corduroy trousers!

It's that time of year when I come blinking out of my long, miserable hibernation and remember that London on a sunny day is delightful.

I just think birds are neat I guess.

A little bit obsessed with the new Jessie Ware album. The drama of this one! open.spotify.com/track/79Qn3s...

thinking about this 1500 year old plush swan made of reindeer wool

Wow, no barrels have been left unscraped in finding candidates for these upcoming elections.

My whole life is my worst fashion phase

Last time I saw Avenue Q in the West End I was a teenager. And yet I still went ahead and got a BA in English...

Are true crime podcasts just the modern equivalent of going to the town square to watch a hanging

The horse op-ed is an instant classic. I can't tell you how much joy this piece gives me. It should be taught in every introductory writing class in no small part because the horse arguments are so compelling. "I have noticed that human children get to eat cake. But I am bigger than the children."

The new SLAYYYTER album is really very good. Wears its influences on its sleeve but never feels like a pastiche. open.spotify.com/album/5siV9C...

Imagine going to space and you don't even get to turn your out of office on.

This is my favorite climate change chart. Japanese monks, aristocrats, and emperors kept meticulous records of cherry blossom festivals for 1,200 years and accidentally built the world's longest climate dataset.

St Vincent's set at The Proms was one of the best gigs I've been to. I'm excited to revisit it now a live album has been released open.spotify.com/album/2xdIxg...

So many roles! So many costumes! So many accents! This production occasionally buckles under its gimmick if I'm honest, but it's very impressive all the same, and doesn't outstay it's welcome.

It's not enough to be able to mute words and phrases. I need to mute an actor's face.

POV: you've come home and found your flatmate Florence Pugh has used your last face mask from Lush.

wait, fuck, this is gorillaz

Right now, unfolding around us on a global scale, is a rich and unambiguous lesson on the dangers of fossil fuel dependence. The most obvious solution is for the affected countries to reduce their dependence through clean energy. Are you seeing that message in media?

And as if the hotel's soundproofing wasn't bad enough, there is a light that never goes out.

I am listening to Liza Minnelli's audiobook. I admire her commitment to dropping names. Every now and then she'll just pause the narrative to list the incredibly famous people from the 70s who turned up to a party she was throwing.

I was utterly dazzled by St. Alexander Nevsky Cathedral in Sofia. The inside is beautiful too. Lots of peacocks and lions and saints with brilliant gold halos.

I don't hate this photo. That is all.