Ego Death at the Costco Gas Line

Dirty talk in your thirties be like "don't forget to take Prilosec, you sexy bitch🔥😘"

Idk why, but shouting "I once got busy in a burger king bathroom" while painting the basement is peak 30s behavior.

Welcome to the Bluesky account for Stand Up for Science 2025! Keep an eye on this space for updates, event information, and ways to get involved. We can't wait to see everyone #standupforscience2025 on March 7th, both in DC and locations nationwide! #scienceforall #sciencenotsilence

Why have rizz when you can be... #podcast #90s #airwolf

Maturity is realizing The Well Temper Klavier was never a torture device and was, in fact, a learning tool all along.

that’s right.

I put an obscene amount of butter on my popcorn tonight while telling the stranger next to me it was like making a smoothie. Sowing the seeds of chaos is hard work, but someone's gotta do it.

Well I took enough Excedrin to drop a horse and washed it down with an entire pot of coffee, so now my migraine's gone but I'm never sleeping again and I can feel my pulse in sinuses. You win some, you lose some. 🤷

Yellowstone is Succession, but yeehaw.

Wow. Caroline Kennedy breaks her silence on RFK Jr in a message to Senators: “We grew up together. It’s no surprise that he keeps birds of prey as pets because Bobby himself is a predator. He enjoyed showing off by putting baby chickens & mice in a blender to feed to his hawks.”

"Do what is within your means and abilities."

Just huffin old book for some dopamine.

Hear me out: the talking car shows of the late 80s/early 90s were America's version of the TARDIS

When you Google "I just drank coffee that's been airing on the counter for, like, 72 hours. Will I die?" Google just says "don't do that." So I guess my life is safe. My digestive tract is another story.

Animal Crossing would be so much better if I could overthrow Tom Nook.