Automated hold message telling me that lines close at 5pm. How long do they think I’ll be waiting?

I hope whatever they find will be called ‘bin juice’

By Timothy, I might have found it. The mountain lines are pretty close, no? #TheLivingDaylights

Wes Anderson: The Archives at The Design Museum. Loved it.

TV historian Laurence Westgaph sued us to expose our sources and posted sinister threats about me and the 'cutthroats and sell outs'. We spent £75,000 fighting him in court - a crucial first test of the 'journalism exemption' in GDPR. And we won!! ✌️ www.livpost.co.uk/a-dish-best-...

Longing to be back in the cool serenity of an alpine gorge.

Saw your mum’s favourite book

It's pretty gracious of him to show up at all, given that his side lost.

Cabin Pressure is honestly one of the best British sitcoms of the 21st Century so far - if you haven't heard any of it yet, treat yerself

Bon voyage, Herc.

Honestly, I could kill those triplets.

Easy. youtu.be/pOfT9fS9QPY?...

Gone but never ever forgotten. m.youtube.com/watch?v=1X1u...

Stop trying to make brioche happen.

Big up Widnes! (my home until I was seven)

100% fuck that.

The next James Bond should be whomever pisses off the whiny pissbabies most. They should become incandescent with rage over the casting, pissing and shitting and throwing up until they go all inside out through their holes.

Never mind this year's contest. Come back with me to the 1950s and 60s, from where I've picked eight of the best #Eurovision songs of the era, all of which deserve hearing and remembering. nearertotheend.co.uk/2026/05/15/e...

Bored in a terrible local government job, I used to amuse myself by editing Wikipedia but ended up banned after repeatedly changing Bruce Forsyth's catchphrase to "nice to see you, nice to see you too".

Happy birthday to Margaret Calvert, designer for much of the UK road signage system. 90 today! en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Margare...

Let’s do some democracy.

Honestly, 20% of my job is just figuring out what M*crosoft has changed that day, suddenly making my life more difficult.

In cognitive decline news, I just forgot the words ‘watering can’. The closest I got was ‘plant waterer’.

The DeLorean story is endlessly fascinating. Can recommend this novel about impact the factory had on Northern Ireland.

-It’s ‘Reliant Robin’

Too many emails, not enough biscuits.

How do I make all betting advertising fuck off, keep fucking off and carry on fucking off until eternity?

This is an absolutely top-notch read and includes the sublime phrase “glossy-looking pulpits”. (Be warned: also contains scary pictures of Enoch Powell)

They could at least have called it the Tring Spring Fling.

Never has a phrase been more bastardised than “legitimate interests”.

Over on Threads, someone has called the pilot of Star Trek: The Next Generation “Farpoint Station”.

I was in Twatt earlier but the residents have obviously taken all the signs down so you’ll just have to take my word for it.

Goodnight and good luck.

Doing an armageddon bang in the middle of a series of Sort Your Life Out is a war crime in itself.

Fucking LinkedIn.

Ohmygod Ohmygod Ohmygod Ohmygod Ohmygod Ohmygod

I think I might have actually burst something from laughing solidly for two hours. Pappy’s, Rosie Jones and Mike Wozniak - take a bow.

CHESS on BBC Two! Nobody’s Side is a stone cold fucking banger.

He’s so awful.

Un. Bear. Able.

Am currently tracking three deliveries and have never felt so alive.

Mia Soteriou is the fourth #Andor actor to feature in #TheArchers, fact fans.

It’s an Evil-Under-The-Sun-under-a-blanket kind of an afternoon.