I knew it! I blew ya.

We didn’t get Bernie bc, quite frankly, we never deserved him.

Proof of life @gypsican.bsky.social

Whenever I’m serving straight couples I’m always sure to compliment the girl in someway and make her laugh. This way the man will tip me big not to steal his woman.

What have I done to be ad targeted with these babies

Hate when my kids asks if we did that in the 1900s

Who would win in an elder fight on Tuesday board game afternoons. Mahjong ladies or the bridge ladies.

Is there a name for the phenomenon for only seeming to want to cook spaghetti whilst wearing white?

My mommas first cake she’s ever baked on a “professional” level. A very special birthday indeed ❤️ #june #birthday #cake

Lil celebration day for @gypsican.bsky.social ‘s birthday!❤️🎂

Human design flaw. Non removable eyeballs - for when you have a migraine and need pressure relief.

This man just saw the donut table and said “oo gooeys!”

Not me just realizing I’m currently working a right to life golf outing 😬

I think my swooning response is broken.

Driving with no shoes on like god intended

Turns out, the low road is WAY better

To be perfectly candid - I’m sick of feeling nothing.

Sorry just was on anti depressants for a year and lost my funny

Hey boat dudes listen up: part of my summer bucket list is to get fucked naked on a boat. After that you don’t ever have to interact with me again. You will have served your purpose and I’ll serve you mine.

When I’m gone I’m falling through a black hole then I land on a dick and start over

Been away for a while #promosky #selfie #altgirl #freakyfriday

Someone who gets me

Trying to make my alt happen #promosky

Good Monday all 🌞❤️

All I want is for him to crawl to me on his knees and beg my forgiveness. I’m a reasonable person.

Wish I could “dual-screen” my actual sight. I wanna read and color simultaneously.

We’d be good together if he wasn’t such an unwavering prick

Just a little more sleep then I’ll change my life

Had to make a floor bed and my dogs have already encroached on my leg space

In our healing era ❤️‍🩹✨ Tooty bears lack of toe is almost entirely healed!

I am stuck. On my floor. I have succumb to my fate of being here for multiple hours.

Yes of course you can buy me Chinese ❤️

How do I not have a valentine?! Oh bc I’m crazy, I remember now 🤪❤️ #bemine

Twerking to the bad bunny halftime show everyday until all the snowflakes melt

RIP to all the hot country guys who were poisoned by trump. Can’t even flirt with yall 😭

If my stocks growls we are past the point of no return

I thought after Regina George got hit by that bus she was supposed to be nicer not become the current attorney general.

Wait, who won the Super Bowl?

Bonding with the herd at the Secretary of State.

Suddenly wildly attracted to dad types in their 40s but there’s a communication barrier I’m struggling with that I can’t quite place.

Ope he fell asleep

Just said “idgaf” to a 41 yr old man via text. What are the odds he’s googling it.

Waiting until the verge of losing consciousness before i make food bc i have zero survival instincts apparently

Ok, I’m getting up to clean the house…now!

Ever since I left my ex, my daughter breaks into random song and dance that goes “GIRLS HOUSE OOHOOOH GIIIIIRLS HOOOOUSE” so yeah, we’re gonna be fine.

Not “woke” just awake with eyes and a brain

Not my proudest moment but I am proud of it

He’s mentioned in the files more than Harry Potter in Harry Potter.

I was led to believe there would be no truth bombs on this app

Men would have me do everything in the world and still want me to make time to suck their dick