I am “intentionally tuned in to John Williams in concert on PBS” years old and I don’t think I like the implications

I'm glad MLB teams are able to make wholesale changes in spring training, imagine how much more expensive baseball would be if they had to pay retail

“But ‘Elrond’?” “Because it’s a secret meeting.” Thank you for your service, Sean Bean.

if social media had been more prevalent in 1999 do you think we would have seen someone use "Padme Amygdala" as their funny-for-ten-minutes novelty display name

Ranch Pringles are a chip that constantly outkicks its coverage. You'd be right to be skeptical, but I recommend them.

One of the best parts of a new couch is mapping it out and figuring out which parts are best for sitting and which parts are best for napping

the Nick Castellanos stuff is very funny, largely because it's not my clowns and not my circus

“It says a lot that I thought it was real” yeah it says a lot about you and your habits on here

did we get any “it’s time for the Patriots to move on from Drake Maye” takes today and if not whats the holdup

“the Chicago Bears and Illinois lawmakers are close to agreement on key issues that would keep the team in-state” no shit

amending this: I've lived long enough to see Lady Gaga singing the Jigglypuff song

The wrong QB from the draft class of 2024 is in this Super Bowl. There, I said it. Someone had to.

These speed skaters better go faster or the drone is going to catch them

Hey this puppy that can’t see has a bright future as an MLB umpire. Angel Fur-nandez.

Posting a chat gpt caricature of yourself feels like flashing me the std rash you got on purpose

A dachshund driving the Oscar Mayer Wienermobile. Absolute cinema.

Yeah and that's the goddamn problem!

The deer and the people who frequent my local forest preserve are far too comfortable with each other

I enjoy the parade of nations.

getting emotional about Masahiro Sakurai’s cat

At least the Cavaliers get to enjoy James Harden's stability, his leadership, and his stoic team-first personality

saw a Tesla with a bumper sticker pleading “MAKE THIS CAR LESS EMBARRASSING AGAIN” and oh buddy let’s talk about how long it’s been since THAT ship sailed

I'm never going to be rid of goddamn Eugenio Suárez

My first-ever digital camera was $900 for 2.1 megapixels. Photography-minded kids today don't know how good they have it.

SUCK IT Heat

I get called extreme when I refer to the NFL as a failed league, but "NFL officially appointed influential storyteller Dhar Mann as its first-ever Chief Kindness Officer and Creator of the Week for Super Bowl LX" is simply not news that comes from a serious professional sporting league

"The kids seem to be making shivs out of highlighters...?" My last two brain cells: "Jail's not so bad. You can make sangria in the terlet. Of course it's shank or be shanked."

“Name your top 25…” mfer my first name is not BuzzFeed, take your engagement prompts elsewhere as a matter of course but especially take them elsewhere when you’re demanding I post a whole ass listicle for your entertainment

It should have been the Bears. This is stolen valor.

The Seahawks know they’re going to lose this game and it’s going to be solely on that shit ass taunting penalty.

That’s the dumbest shit I’ve ever seen.

"Packers hire Ganon as defensive coordinator." Not concerned.

People like to complain about the snow (in the winter, in Chicago…) but aesthetically, snow on the ground sure beats dead, frozen, withered vegetation everywhere you look

more Dragon Ball Super coming makes me happy

I’m not taking anything away from Rose’s prime years, which were electric, but it feels so much like hollow bread and circuses given how little the organization has achieved since. And even during.

Yu Darvish, man. 🫡

If you can’t recognize a.i. when you see it I don’t trust you to see the context clues a person needs to understand news and information in general

Is this anything? The All-Imperial System Team Aaron Miles Barry Foote Brandon Inge Eric Yardley Riley Pint Zac Gallen

Had to explain to someone today what Tiny Toon Adventures was (again, in a professional setting, because my job is a delight) and I managed but it occurred to me after the fact that I could have just shown them the opening because it quite aptly explains the entire premise of the show in song

Pete Crow-Armstrong and Caleb Williams hanging out and going to multiple Chicago sporting events is fun.

oh boy Mendoza wanted that one

Getting choked up at an AT&T executive telling me how much this game means. God bless the brands.

Tonight’s CFP matchup features schools from Indiana and Florida, two states convinced of their significant importance to the nation, and honestly, ehhhhh

hoping the Rams team plane was unable to depart due to the weather and they’re still stuck on the tarmac, shivering and debating which teammate gets eaten first

As I do not waste your time suggesting grace in victory, I will especially not waste your time suggesting grace in defeat. Tonight is like the Purge, you’re allowed to say whatever you want to any opposing fans who bother you, within reason.

It’s never going to happen for Josh Allen, I’m sorry.

I poke fun at the Cubs Convention a bit but I look at the fan conventions for other teams and they all look like that scam Willy Wonka event. So if nothing else, the Cubs have the gold standard in that arena.

308 hours seems light

I used to enjoy watching the convention coverage on TV. Add that to the list of things gone by the wayside behind a pile of cost increases.