It’s a beautiful 60° day and I have to be at work :-(

One thing about me is I WILL be buying the girl scout cookies whenever I see them

Happy Valentine’s Day to all of my internet boyfriends ilysm

This was me after work btw

Today at work I ran into my coworker while using the restroom and he just looked at me and said “oh, team lift?” I was stunned by that comment

Woke up with the lavender town theme stuck in my head. I don’t even like pokemon??

Husband and I officially declared chopped after not finding any action during our entire nyc vacation

Why are men so afraid of using then urinal these days??? Just show your dick I will look it’s okay

NYC where the 🌿 at

My brother’s boyfriend (hate) replied to my selfie on my ig story

Also, just got a haircut

Taking a trip to New York tomorrow :D Still need to pack my bags :(

I just messed up my goatee so bad while getting ready for work. This is was I get for being a sinner on the skyline D:

Getting kinda thick 😅

I liked Jewels N’ Drugs

Found part of my old cd collection. I was such a little 🚬

Omfg my gas bill this month was over $400 for a two bed apartment

My fav bartender played this song music.apple.com/us/album/cit...

Finally watched Black Phone 2….

I love putting cash in my piggy bank. Makes me feel like I’m doing something right 😋

Reported that one page as extremist content 🖕🧊

Currently in a pozole coma

It meant nothing. Nothing happened. 🫩🫩

Hanging out with my straight friend who said he wants to get “gay drunk” tonight. That could only mean one thing….

Damn I’m wet asf

🚨BREAKING: A car just ran over a protester in Minneapolis as protesters march in the rain against ICE after an ICE agent killed Renee Nicole Good.

Minneapolis.

Order the police to arrest them, then. Order the police to drive them from the state or these are just words from a boy mayor trying to sound like a big man.

Nothing gets me out of bed for work quicker than waking up and realizing there’s more sunlight than there should be 🫩

Timothy’s ass cheeks in Marty Supreme did nothing for me

My coworker was just talking about his pension… he didn’t know nobody else here had one bc they stopped offering them in 2004 🫩

me before i was conceived:

Reviving my song of the day thread for the new year 🥳🎶

the earth:

My New Year’s resolution is to finally cancel the gym membership I never used that I’ve been paying for 5 years

It’s okay bestie, go ahead and unfollow that cute guy who doesn’t follow you back. He’ll never know

I’ll be in New York instead =D

Due to unfortunate circumstances I will no longer be going to LA in February =(

When’s the appropriate time to open a life insurance policy on your elderly husband? (He’s 36)

Just got home from work and have to be back in 10 hours 🫩 Tomorrow will be my 8th day in a row

Omg, you guys….

Just slept for 12 hours wbu

Which bloomfies are going to take me out when I visit LA ??

Shoutout to my husband for my early Christmas gift. He better guard his foreskin from me tonight 🥰

My brother is such a chump I really can’t stand that homo sometimes 🙄

I have a confession… I never like that Natalia Kills girl :p

Me and this guy were really hitting it off until he told me his damn dog thinks I’m a ran in a rask ??

Kinda wanna change my pfp to something silly

Me and my white tiled bathroom selfies against the world

Just got home from work :p #FeelinStinky