Need someone to **** ** ***

Why the fuck are we paying taxes right now? Seriously.

He has risen 🙏🙌 (I just got out of bed)

I don’t think conservatives should be able to enjoy Chicago

My mother just texted me to break the news that she got married on Sunday…. Looks like it’s going to be the other kind of bender boys

I have the next 8 days off should I go on a bender?

Hotties = me and my husband and our twunks

All the hotties are at krave tn I guess. Boots who???

Damn :/ just when I was planning to lick it

I got to take this pic though @sheacoulee.com

Oficially a regular at this bar. The bartender is my new bestie :p

Be honest…… Do I look like a muppet??

Just spent an entire hour talking to AI so I could lower my internet bill…

If you’re in Illinois, don’t forget to go vote today!!!

So karen don’t be sad…. they’re just a bunch of foooooools….

It was 70° two days ago and now it’s snowing

Hot bi dad with tattoos and piercings from my job asks me to go get drinks with him after work :3

No worse feeling than expecting to be home alone after work only to find out your roommate didn’t work today :D

Anyone else get tickets to this??

Trying to be a regular at the new bar by my house I posted about last week. Came in after work and they all greeted me I think it’s working

Y’all I almost lost a tooth at work today… I ended up with a busted lip too 😭

These two guys on the bus talking about their girlfriend problems… you think they’re gonna…

I’m so hungry. What should I eat for lunch??

Also hamm’s beer is gross don’t ever order it… unless it’s only $2

Y’all… I think I’m high key d********

Of course I had to check it out since I’m off tomorrow

New bar opened on my block and it’s exactly the music and vibe (alt/emo/Latino🖤🕷️) I needed in a corner bar. This may be a problem…

Plz help how do I get over my fear of the gym?? I want to get fit so badddd

Just woke up from a nap 😋

Used up all my sick time which means returning to work :/

Get ready with me for a 10 hour overnight shift at *insert corporate retail name here*

Best friend told me last night she got engaged and I actually cried bc her life is so beautiful

It’s a beautiful 60° day and I have to be at work :-(

One thing about me is I WILL be buying the girl scout cookies whenever I see them

Happy Valentine’s Day to all of my internet boyfriends ilysm

This was me after work btw

Today at work I ran into my coworker while using the restroom and he just looked at me and said “oh, team lift?” I was stunned by that comment

Woke up with the lavender town theme stuck in my head. I don’t even like pokemon??

Husband and I officially declared chopped after not finding any action during our entire nyc vacation

Why are men so afraid of using then urinal these days??? Just show your dick I will look it’s okay

NYC where the 🌿 at

My brother’s boyfriend (hate) replied to my selfie on my ig story

Also, just got a haircut

Taking a trip to New York tomorrow :D Still need to pack my bags :(

I just messed up my goatee so bad while getting ready for work. This is was I get for being a sinner on the skyline D:

Getting kinda thick 😅

I liked Jewels N’ Drugs

Found part of my old cd collection. I was such a little 🚬

Omfg my gas bill this month was over $400 for a two bed apartment

My fav bartender played this song music.apple.com/us/album/cit...