guy trying to get my attention at the bar suddenly disinterested when he finds out my usual is a 64oz coca-cola and chicken tenders

sunday morning big man

irritated how many monsters don’t exist. Ancient Greece is bullshit for lying about minotaurs.

you really gotta move on from that game before you get threatened with a lawsuit. again.

One of the evil things about customer service support is when the company sends a survey to you after they don’t fix your problem and if you say you aren’t satisfied it counts against the person that delivered the news

my favorite electro tech is sick

hey everyone i hope you all come to my event on friday! we'll have snacks, all locally sourced from Quantico

the era of louise lucas publicly shit talking a diminutive former GOP senate leader was a lot of fun

I can’t believe Zohran is transing the trains already www.mta.info/article/f-m-...

hot dog. 🌭

Goddamnit, Dutch. What other errands do you have us running for the DA

he's a new yorker, he can be a lil' gay

housing lawyer called me, confirmed i've got all of the lease succession info i need and have everything in order. all i have to do is keep an eye out for court papers from the landlord.

best ending of all time, let's be real

just pulled out my little friends

two chocolate chip banana bread loaves in the oven

The first activation of STEM fight scene is an insane achievement in choreography and performance from Logan Marshall-Green and the stunt coordinators. I am shocked that his profile isn't higher

i wish we had another movie from the team that did Upgrade (2018). I think about the fight choreography with it's OST in it more than any other action movie in the past decade, to me it feels spiritually in line with Dredd in its cyber-grime aesthetic

the twinkie is a dogshit treat. real heads know the butterscotch krimpet is the best cellophane wrapped industrial food product created by The Devil in Hell

AI pioneers pay Financial Times to advertise for more funding

also, movies do not get across how loud guns are. they cause hearing damage. you immediately do not hear as well as you used to when a single gun shot goes off. that's why doing the "blind swordsman" in john wick 4 is so funny

one thing movies don't really get right is just how fuckin' stinky a bunch of blood is. like if you're in a room and there's a bunch of blood, its stinky as hell. much less a body that just pooped its pants too. you would know jason is getting closer to you because he would stink so fucking bad.

it happened again

i have two chairs at my computer that i rotate between several times a day in order to allow dart to steal the seat i'm sitting in without kicking him out of it.

in order to explain a historical act of significant defiance against fascism to an American you must ask them to imagine a sandwich

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blankie time

this is the greatest time to be alive if you are a big fan of omens and portents

sleep with one eye open

making an herb garlic butter. gotta slop the chicken i gotta spatchcock and roast with something between the skin and meat

Zohran says you’re trans now

shy

my housing lawyer texted me and told me it's open season on all suckheads, with this picture

sorry man I don’t have anything on me. maybe go get a job

as a transplant to NYC, i just want to say to all native nyc conservatives: haha my city now

gonna need smiling jay jones pointing a gun to be a popular reply on the internet to republicans.

the path forward for democrats is to tell Americans you not only have a vision for the future, but that you want republicans to be punished for this bullshit. i want a senator who quote tweets the president with a picture of a gun during impeachment.

incredibly satisfying to see all the wrong lessons being taken by a status quo that's bleeding internally. we live in a time where a nick mullen endorsement gets more voter turn out than either Clintons', and the news is going to be bleeding to death in front of us still obsessed with a third way

cole escola writing a ms piggy movie is the second greatest news today.

okay lets primary schumer and gillibrand next

biggest reveal of the night was that adam friedland is in a dennis kucinich style of relationship. good on him

This needs more attention: Zohran SPLIT the straights with Cuomo. ALL of his margin was from LGBTQ+ voters. Every Dem who ever said “we should abandon the transes” needs this shoved down their fucking throat with a ramrod.

in his first post election interview, jay jones has been non-responsive to questions for three minutes while doing the kubrick stare. the only thing he's responded to is a question about his plans, in which he points to his phone and grins

BREAKING: New York City Mayor-Elect Zohran Mamdani addressing leaks that he is the current leader of Dead Cell. Upon being confronted with the accusation, he donned an eye patch and said, "i like you, don't go to federal hall tomorrow"

almost been a month since getting her out of my life. what a time to be getting your life in order, its like i have an extra wind to carry me to what i need to do.

no, i will not listen to Bush. i am in this 90's playlist to listen to Helmet go chunga cruncha with the guitars, i'm not interested in gavin trying to get a terminal amount of pussy with a ballad.

you could say that we are sitting at the table of success. do you see that waiter? that used to be your hater.

the funniest thing in the lead up to the election was every politician who represents the mid-west decrying zohran because they're concerned about their jewish constituents. sorry to eliza slotkin, but the fourteen zionists in your state aren't much more than a hill of beans anymore

raytheon acres is trying to take all the attention for electing their favorite supervisor to governor after they all got fired by trump, and they don't realize the only person the nation cares about in their state is The Guy With Cool Texts