And to look good doing it! 👴

Powered by Wardendurance Protein. 💪 Use Code Venatori for 66% off your first order! 💲 Stop smelling Rook, put down your spellbooks, pick up your shield, and face the Blight as Grey Wardens! 🛡️ #JustWardenThings

Whomstsoever convinced me, the illustrious First Warden, to be at the Gym at 3am and do cardio at 4am shall be sent into the Deep Roads to face Darkspawn for the rest of their days posthaste. #WardenduranceProtein #MondayThoughts #gymbros #exilerook

Ugh... geese... one of the Maker's most foul creations...

*wakes up sweating from a nightmare about blighted geese* GAHHHHH!!!!!!!

@greenknight86.bsky.social is an agent of Ghilan'nain and her most vile creation GEESE!!!! #DOWNWITHTHEHONK #THEGREYWARDENS #HASHTAG

This you? #DOWNWITHTHEHONK #THEGREYWARDENS #IT'SDUCKDUCKGOOSENOTGOOSEGOOSEDUCK

A single goose can cause as much damage to a civilian population as 100 Darkspawn. They must be defeated. #TheMoreYouKnow #ReadingRainbow #DOWNWITHTHEHONK

ATTENTION: Effective Immediately, The Grey Wardens are rebranding to THE GREY WARDENS. We'll stand against the Blight that wreaks havoc against Thedas. We'll also stand against EVIL INCARNATE aka GEESE!!!! #DOWNWITHTHEHONK

👀👀👀 (Psst, use code AND3RS for 50% off your next order of Wardendurance Protein!)

Quack

Sometimes...it's just...hard, y'know? 🪨🚶‍♂️ Leading the Wardens, fighting the Blight...🛡️ I just...wanted to keep Thedas safe. 💜 Then the Walls fell 🏰 I did what any leader must...I purchased WARDENDURANCE PROTEIN, 45G OF PROTEIN AND 90G OF LYRIUM FOR JUST 100 CALORIES! #BUYNOW#SUPPORTAWARDEN

I heard Glastrum was shredded. I heard Glastrum has a six pack.

~No one's slick as Glastrum~ ~No one's quick as Glastrum~ ~No one's neck's as incredibly thick as Glastrum~

ROOK.

Congratulations, my dear friends. It seems, perhaps, mayhaps even likely, that the Grey Wardens' nomination was, hmm, lost in the Fademail 📪☹️

whatever it takes* *except genAI

Blood magic to end the Blight? Acceptable. 🩸 Betrayal of allies, pacts with demons, night unspeakable acts to end the Blight? Acceptable. 👹 There's almost nothing the Wardens would not do to end the Blight.🛡️ But GenAI? We wouldn't do that. 👎

As the young fledgling Wardens would say these days, ahem, "FACTS."

Corypheus is mid.

Effective immediately, I am resigning my post as the First Warden, Supreme Commander of Weisshaupt, and Last Line of Defense Against the Blight.

Oh great, they're Rooking up my soaps.

👋Hey. I expected to open the QRPs to see the Hero's praises of their First Warden, and instead I had my feelings hurt. 😾 *Frowns ☹️* 🤔Some would interpret these responses as a means of change, but my good Wardens...🛡️ I do not. 👎

You'll do whatever it takes to end the Blight, Warden. Dare I remind you of your responsibilities!?

The Butcher and I have had interesting conversations regarding Treviso, the Crows, and the Grey Wardens, too.

Thank you everyone for the ringing endorsements! I am sure that every new person who follows me support the return of the Imperium, and aren't just a bunch of Rooks and Inquisitors in trenchcoats.

DLSS 5 Off/DLSS 5 On

Reports of "cheesy bunks" flood Weisshaupt whenever Alistair swoops in. Do with that what you will.

This is an annual reminder to all Grey Wardens, but especially ROOK. 🛡️ The Wardens disavow violence in the workplace, and any Warden contributing to a hostile workplace environment is subject to suspension without pay pending an internal investigation. 🕵️‍♂️ Don't hit commanders! 👊

How is a tome titled "Twilight" not a manual on ancient Darkspawn fighting techniques!?! The gall.

Andraste's knickers, Fifty Shades of Grey isn't even about the Wardens at all! 😤

I will not lie; we Grey Wardens pay a heavy price to be manipulative. Fate may decree that you make waves around the city now rather than later.

Someone's been drinking a little too much Wardendurance...

Veilguard smellguard. The Wardens were vigilant before it was cool 🛡️

By the Maker's withered knuckles, I'll have the thief dragged through the streets of Orlais, served up to the unholiest Darkspawn, and leave them stranded in the Deep Roads. I'll be their Calling if they don't return Wardendurance posthaste.🛡️ Who was it? WHO. WAS. IT. 👊

According to this book, someone's stolen the recipe for Wardendurance™️ Great! Just great!! 🙄

I've asked Evka and Antoine, respectively, to investigate Darkspawn activity in the Hossberg Wetlands and the Orlesian border. 🕵️‍♂️🕵️‍♀️ There's no romance like protecting Thedas against the Blight, separately. 🛡️

Enemies of the *hic* Wardens: 1 - Knight 2 - Darkspawn 3 - Venatori

Hehehe, Jowin GlASStrum, amirite?

And I'm the one being investigated when there are such crimes coming from the Inquisition? 🤔😒

Perhaps we've lost sight of what's important. Rook can KICK Rocks 24/7, 7/11, 9-5, 33, 6-7.

@firstgreywarden.bsky.social I have changed my mind. You will continue to distribute this protein powder.

Alright, First Warden. Hand me a bottle. If I live, I’ll have my proof. If I die…

So basically

It is for inane acts like this that our alliance was destroyed.