i want to see her get into it with the guy who sells $50 hot sauce but complains about gentrification. (sorry i blocked his name out of my head)

at some point he is unironically going to say we should rename the country the united states of trump, and the media will try to spin it as a joke.

it would be nice if facebook would do the thing some news sites do and flag old content, like… “HEY DUMMY YOU ARE COMMENTING ON A 4 YEAR OLD POST. WE ARE NOT HAVING ANOTHER CHILD!”

The only response here is a motion to enjoin the whole operation If the government's position is "I'm sorry your honor but we don't be the capacity to both respect constitutional rights and conduct the operation as it is currently being conducted" the answer is "then you must stop the operation"

I once was in line at a Wendy's with a bunch of Pitt basketball players. this is how I felt.

and we have to live through another generation (hopefully) learning that third parties are dead ends in us politics at the worst possible time.

maybe they'll let you bet on how many blue m&m's there are in the pack. how many leaves there are on the head of lettuce. what your chicken breast weighs.

I want to make an age gap relationship joke but god damn that baby elephant is just too cute.

the government should hire more alums of non-elite universities

Edgy internet leftism consists of only one proposition, to wit: There must be Activists whom the Cause of righteousness protects but does not bind, and Shitlibs whom it binds but does not protect.

you stupid milquetoast lib, you don’t get to tell us how to protest, we’re gonna light shit on fire whether you like it or not, snitches get stitches HEY PUT THAT WHISTLE AWAY YOU MIGHT TRAUMATIZE SOMEONE

my 3.5 year old has somehow picked up the millennial “literally”. kid: “i want to send miss sarah emojis!” mom: “how about you send daddy emojis instead” kid: “ugh… no! he’s *literally* sitting right next to us!”

my kid is obsessed with wonder woman, so we found this series. the change from 2015 to 2019 versions imo is a great example of positive changes of woke 1.0. the original feels more connected to 80s/90s cartoons than today. every character is a barbie doll. new version much more diverse & relatable.

told my kid she could pick out one book at the bookstore. this is what she chose.

watching the YouTube famous London chefs make "buffalo" wings

thank goodness he's covering his face so he won't lose his global entry

in Costco today... heard another dad singing "let it go" under his breath... how many people have that song stuck in their head at any one time? gotta be in the tens, if not 100s of thousands. (now imagining a dystopian future where record labels get royalties for songs that play inside your head)

“Democrats shut down FEMA in the aftermath of a huge winter storm!”

“old bullet head” is a goat nickname

a future to believe in

bachelor night. decided to watch that movie starring two future governors i somehow missed out on as a kid.

i wouldn’t go that far… but he might wind up like this

this is a huge deal. bovino was clearly positioning himself to be the face of trumpian immigration enforcement. and trump has absolutely refused to cashier anyone high profile; always doubling down. the ? is whether this came from the top or from someone up the food chain trying to save their hide.

this is the same exact flavor of copium the british huffed during the revolution. "surely if we strike a decisive blow, the people will flock to our flag. most americans are still loyal to the crown even if they can't say it out loud!"

is gmail bugged? nothing is going to updates or promotions anymore. everything is going to my inbox.

I'm sorry you're telling me this *isn't* Kenan doing a bit on SNL???

they didn't publish the bad bunny questions! wtf?! emersoncollegepolling.com/january-2026...

they might be giants with big naturals

Let's be real: No-one has an definitive explanation for where babies come from.

HHHOOLLLELYYY YShitYY

me during the second 'movement' of barber's symphony in one movement

just witnessed someone come to a complete stop on the interstate because they were about to miss their exit. the next exit was literally a quarter mile away. the ramp was visible. selfish lunatics, man.

I hate the fallow YouTube channel for making me want to do stupid stuff like make my own demiglace

bros can you give me a few minutes alone in the hut with the ladies' corsets ad?

I just got an Emerson poll that went from questions on Greenland and Venezuela to questions about Bad Bunny, which raises the question... is he running?

this is worse than OG covid. temp is back above 102 even though I took DayQuil like 3 hours ago.

… a chimney sweep channel called “flue shots”. you can have that one for free

procrastinated getting my flu shot & paying the price.

not the greatest night to be a sportscaster doing a verizon sponsor read.

My 3 year old is reading Foucault and asked me, tears in his eyes, "why is power in society only reified through force and surveillance?" I told him to read more Fanon

Has anyone asked Will if he's kitted out in a balaclava and burner phone? Bowie knife? Go bag? Off-frequency walkie talkie? Faraday tent? Flex cuffs? Sortie orders? Paracord bracelet? Life vest? Baking soda? Tactical pen? Map of escape coordinates? Emergency beans? Can't believe he left the house.

Rich cultural text that Will Stancil is in the streets of Minneapolis fighting ICE while the ten thousand losers who want him to dead are petrified of No Kings events because they might see a mom with a cell phone. Just a perfect distillation of every discourse.

“i never know when the job is done… so i never finish” — pete the cat’s dad (aka elvis costello) bro, same.

back to his first term, i’ve said (half jokingly) that he’s not a liar… he believes everything he says at the moment that he’s saying it. it’s part of his personality disorder.

also feel like an american would have written “protein and fat” / “bread and pasta” (all singular). feels like a math/maths type thing. maybe i’m wrong.