dear universe. thanks for making me not flammable

imagine being in danger of fire

CCNSOMEONEF OLEASE HELPME .

[ heard the word "exit" and turned around so fast it almost knocked their helmet loose ]

I DONT LIKE THJS ONE CCAN WE REROLL.

wh

୨ৎ ──── NO, I NEED TO       HIT THE BOTTOM .ᐟ 🎤 l||l°l||l°l||l°l||l°l||l°l||l°l||l°l||l°l||l°l||l°l||l ⸮⸮⸮⸮ — PENNED BY #MAGNETICDOG! 🖊️🔎

there is probably something fundamentally wrong with me

way aghead of you man.

okay. [ inhale ] I HATE . EVERYTHING

yeah well [ pausing ] ..., yeah well i kinda just wanted something to be mad about okay.

[ kicking at the floor like an angry child ] [ loud clunk sfx ]

. no

.................. well i dont have any other. ideas. sso

oh but i get bucket.

[ suddenly really scared ] [ they physically cannot be hurt by insects due to being made of metal but they are still scared of them. ]

i cant swim

] zooble isnt even here to defend themself guys cmon

see thats what i thought but i didnt say it out loud.

um

Im not here this isnt Happegning

[ walks by and trips on nothing and falls flat on their face and clatters really loudly interrupting any conversation that might have been going on ] Sorry

] i think kinger's name for them might be what sticks. i think they might be Bucket now

what's happening. who is that

] you can really tell who has autism by who responds to spamton with more all caps than usual

what's happening. who is that

] i tried to put a knight helmet on my celestia mii yesterday and they hated it. it's like they Know

] sorry i'm alive i swear.

//if you laugh you go to the cellar

] you can't laugh you fucking idiot your best name candidate currently is Tea Pot

// bloxi hella off model but im half asleep so whatever @virtualbuzz.bsky.social

y— no im not actually that heavy don't worry about it. it's fine . [ on one hand, they're right, they're not as heavy as an actual suit of armor. on the other hand, they just are not very good at this. ]

yeah i'm Fine . [ they ignore her hand completely and start trying to get up on their own. being a suit of armor makes this fairly difficult. ]

[ clattering from several feet away ] [ they tried to look cool and nonchalant when she showed up and immediately tripped ]

] celestia and jax

you piss me off so bad i hope we both die.

] when i do the font you just have to imagine them yelling as loudly as physically possible

. i𝐈’𝐌 𝐆𝐎𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐓𝐎 𝐊𝐈𝐋𝐋 𝐘𝐎𝐔 .

[ suddenly dead serious] when i abstract i'm coming after you first.

I DONT WANT YOU.

] almost gave them a free swear oops. which would be really funny if they simply got so goddamn mad they bypassed the censors for one (1) word

𝐆𝐄𝐓 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐅$!@# 𝐎𝐔𝐓?????

i dont ljke you .

youre Not Hot.

] i have an idea for how i could introduce cerise but i need a caine.

I D— i b. ph— i i DIDNT .PICK IT?

𝐍𝐎?????????????????

[ they have no teeth to grit but you can hear it in their voice ] i'm ggoing to bonkers you. [ ????? ]

] so easy to ragebait them it's almost sad