This is the account of someone who just realized that Jennifer Lopez is “Jenny from the block” because Jenny is short for Jennifer :0

This is the account of someone who just realized that Jennifer Lopez is “Jenny from the block” because Jenny is short for Jennifer :0

Can I substitute a savory Jesus in place of a sweet Jesus? Xoxo Eucharist Girl

Anyway let’s digress back from the digression so we can get back to what I was originally digressing from

Sill gooses rise up!

Did dinosaurs taste like chicken or does chicken taste like dinosaurs?

Queer 26-year-old nesting is deep cleaning your apartment before your friends come to visit because they can’t know about the squalor

winter is all about wearing the same three outfits on rotation like a cartoon character

I would be 10% more productive with a picnic basket in my life (I say having said this about the last ten silly whim purchases)

Nbd stands for “nonbinary disaster “

Who knew I’d be buying so many 8ths in the future… I guess Sesame Street did

For Sale: Katanas, Never Drawn

Sanity is just peer review

What is the difference between ramen and soup? Like how do you make ramen in a way that makes it ramen versus soup?

Me waking up on 2 hours of sleep and trying to fix it with a cute outfit.

Things Jimmy Carter killed… 1. Being President 2. Guinea Worm 3. Nosferatu

The petty cabs have stopped playing Christmas music, the world has moved on!

I’m walking on Fluoxetine (ohhhhh)

Real life footage of my birth

I grow stronger with each paycheck

Pretty fucked up that Jimmy Carter lived to see Wicked Part 1 but not Part 2

RIP President Jimmy Carter

I didn’t consent to having any knowledge

I have once again become the cause of my own loneliness

Trixs are for kids and members of ACA

Hot girls say “copy” instead of “will do” or “kk”. Walkie talkie talk only

There is no kind of satisfaction like using a walkie talkie professionally. Over. Out. Copy

Did anyone else see the “help Muhammad find a wife” billboards? I just want to ever know if he found a wife

The greatest trilogy is Netflix’s “The Princess Switch starring Vanessa Hudgens

I miss when Vanessa Hudgens was in her Netflix Christmas movie era!

I am a messy burrito

I am blue sky’s Cassandra

I am late on the Kaos train, but can Netflix stop making amazing properties and then canceling them????

I am a little lost in the figgy pudding

This holiday season is sponsored by Pizza Rat

Silly fact #1. As a kid, I wanted my nickname to be “the librarian” because I always have a book or movie to reference

Don’t awake the kraken! If you ask me “what’s up” I will recommend you a new movie, show, or book

The Nicholas cage gods chose me and gave me a lost Cage classic

I feel at home when the PCH Barbie and emo beach houses go viral

I have been frost nibbled

Which god do I have to pray to fix my chapped upper lip??

Where is my romantic coffee shop meet cute? The screenwriter of my life seems to realllllly love character development but not fluffy romances

(To the tune of white Christmas) I’m dreaming of a economically stable financial situation Just like the ones my parents had

I’m like a pancake looking for her maple syrup

If life’s a stage then I hope my anxiety is dramaturgically relevant

Think Pink!

Is it just me or was “white Christmas” written too early??? Like dramaturgically it reads like it’s from the perspective of someone going through climate change

Come close girly we shall gossip for warmth