Still haven't gotten back to me on the 'gram.

So much for my "a hot gog" would cure my depression theory:

Puppies!

WAKWNTH

This album isn't actually, you know, good? I get why it gets lauded so much but it has a deficit of good songs and a surprlus of bad singing, annoying/tinny electronic drums, and damned saxophones. Good on him for running through the tape and all, but nah. ⭐⭐ #1001Albums

LOLOL. Had this happen on a file last year. Congrats to the AUSAs and SAUSAs of Minnesota: you've now achieved the "shitty psycho landlord" level of litigation excellence.

Dracula Plus: Because health insurance bites ™

The pastor is spitting this morning. Gonna tell 'em the Lord sent me.

Going in the opposite direction like you did at that recruiting dinner when you got the phone call about the Cincinnati job, eh Tubs? What a bunch of DARVO nonsense.

Made it all the way to 6:15 a.m. today without sending an unhinged email to a website's "Contact Us" form screaming at them for inflicting generative AI slop on us and not giving us a "MAKE IT GO THE FUCK AWAY" button.

Motherfuckers, I'm going to need you all to meet me at the Tommy Douglas Statue in Weyburn, Saskatchewan and after paying our respects to The Greatest Canadian we'll walk the 10 minutes over to the KFC buffet.

How I like to spend a Tuesday night: reading up on the correct interpretation of "a/an" in a statute.

You see, it's simply not possible for Celtic to compete in Europe. We're not a top 100 club and we don't have the financial resources or infrastructure of a traditional big European club like FK Bodø/Glimt. Celtic supporters are much too entitled.

I am very sad right now. But in 90 aeconds I'll be very happy because I'll be eating mac and cheese.

It's all about production values, really.

An absolutely insane racket. Even corporate clients were like "what in the hell"?

An all-time album and probably my all-time musician crush. I really think Liz and I would have a lot in common, tbh. Except that I can't play guitar and have no discernible talents. ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ #1001Albums

It's fucking wild that it's legal to sell the cover pervert goggles. When I taught privacy law I used to teach a case about a high school teacher getting criminally charged with voyeurism for using a secret camera pen to record his female students and now it's just OK for this to be mass marketed?

It has to happen tonight, right?

Mac and cheese way for dinner.

Oh, well, fuck, if the fucking torture memo guy says it's cool then it must be fine. I'd say something about the media but I don't want the group chat dogpiling me.

This is Robert Christgau's review of what album?

I would get so much more done in a workday if I had telekinesis.

Guess the USS Gerald R. Ford is going to have to head for the Suez Canal now.

The new desk phone has been initializing for 22 hours. Let IT know: Y/N?

Here's a fun little fact about the importance of freedom of speech.

I'm really glad I don't want to be influential. Imma just stick to typing my little jokes and will NEVER pivot to video.* * Unless I see the zamboni or a cool bird or something.

Man down! Man down!

Thought the week was going to get off to a horrible start here, but the website gave me Exile in Guyville so everything is great, actually.

@thegurglingcod.bsky.social 🔥🔥🔥

Every single damn melon. All of them. Without exception.

Here's one for blocking, folks. 1 post, 2.6K replies (all racist). And I can confirm from years of personal experience that, like all kids, Punjabi boys will generally behave in line with your expectations for them. That's why the majority of my old high school player have doe really well.

I want one so so badly. Mine's juat barely hanging on.

Just switched which task I was working on 3 times in 15 seconds. None of you are on my level.

"Nu metal" may be the worst thing to ever happen to Western Civilization. More singing and less growling, please. Made it 45 seconds into this before reaching this conclusion. Makes Limp Bizkit sound like Mozart. ⭐ #1001Albums

Central bankers: long renowned for their commitment to the priniciples of Marxist-Leninism.

Some more than decent bleeps and bloops here but, much like Jason Mendoza, I was waiting for the beat to drop and it just . . . never dropped. I guess that's the nature of ambient, but still. ⭐⭐⭐⭐ #1001Albums

Much better for everybody to have Kash Patel partying with the hockey team than trying to do his actual job.

Quite a fun little album, though I have no idea what's going on. Goes in the "would grab it if I found a copy in the $2/$3 bargain bin" category but not more than that. ⭐⭐⭐ #1001Albums

A dogshit running back at Ollie High whose teammates mocked him for how fucking dumb he was. Announced today he'll repeal all anti-discrimination laws in BC on "day 1 as Premier."

"Halle Berry's not hot anymore" is a plot hole the size of the Grand Canyon.

Mick Cronin stole this one straight out of Jim Harrick's playbook.

Oh no. It just occurred to me that I've been fucking up by not dicing up the tenders and putting them on my Cajun poutine. We're basically at POPCON 2 now.

Those 99 cent 7/11 cheeseburgers from back in the day. Nothing wrong with that horsemeat that 7 big pumps from the mustard dispenser couldn't fix.

Does the world really need a laudatory/celebratory Michael Jackson biopic?

Starmer 2.0, a more authentic Starmer, is the dumbest shit I've read in my life. He's authentically insincere, FFS; that's the gist of him.

Hear me out.