how is sledding an olympic sport, come on man: “next up in the olympics, tree climbing, followed by block-stacking and summersaults”

if someone ever angrily shook their fist in the air at me while i ran off, i would be so ashamed. i would start crying and i’d go back and apologize to them.

its cool how there's never been a single quality justification for restrictive borders for civilians in history

is that “thing” from the lauryn hill song the same thing from the john carpenter movie?

pirates are the only type of criminal who have their own special accent just for them

The intersection of anti-vax eugenics and racist mass-kidnapping is industrial murder via forced infection.

I couldnt stop thinking about this. Reading, going through notes and put together a rough timeline that would explain that spread of symptoms and the long and short of it is they shot this man so full of antipsychotic medication no one could ever justify and it made his body poison itself to death.

Tom Waits, Lemmy Kilmister, Billie Joe Armstrong, & Prince

a cat account would never say something like this

I cant verify if this anecdote is true but if so, very funny comparison of what kinds of flags Dylan Carlson considers a deal breaker vs what flags he doesn’t.

real stupid of humans to evolve from chimpanzees instead of orangutans, that’s where we fucked up

I feel so betrayed by luigi now that it seems like he didnt do it. how dare he

Lyonel Baratheon invented the mosh pit

God i hate to glaze a fucking politician like this but i just saw the video of Ilhan getting sprayed with the liquid and she immediately charges at the guy and winds up to throw a punch its pretty sick.

elected dems: "we just want to return to the sane, competent immigration enforcement that we had under president biden" [the immigration enforcement we had under president biden]

i don’t think the US government has ever looked weaker than it has while talking about Alex Pretti

I don't want to stop with Bovino, or with Noem, or with Miller, or with Bondi, Vance, or Trump. I want this entire fake fucking issue of immigration to go away.

they're executing moms and nurses in the street. they're using preschoolers as bait. they're stealing people's dads and grandmas and children. they're tear gassing babies. they're staking out schools. there is no remedy but abolition. any proposal that doesn't start there is an act of violence.

"As many as 1,360 children have never been reunited with their parents six years after the United States government forcibly separated them at the US border to deter migrants."

I’m not being a “doomer” when I say that the moon isn’t made of cheese, I’m just suggesting that if you’re gonna go there, maybe you should pack a cheese lunch

America is not only evil, it is *the most evil* entity to exist since it came to a power in a time where we could solve scarcity and squalor with our productive forces and then murdered hundreds of millions to make sure that can never happen. Fuck this place forever it needs to die

Battlebots would be the biggest sport in the world if they made the robots like ten feet tall.

There is auld lang syne and there is bauld lang syne, but there is no auld bauld lang syne.

But the best course of action is to be quiet and play nice, right Tim?

When I get old I won’t have a yard or anything nice to be a fuddy duddy about so I’ll have to be like: “the damn kids are running amok in my mentions again!”

Going to a wine tasting and carrying myself like I’m the fanciest one there, and loudly proclaiming that every wine tastes “like grapes”.

SHOUT THIS FROM EVERY ROOFTOP. This is just policing, period. More overt in some ways. Most cops at least prefer to do state violence where they aren't going to be easily seen. But no real difference. Same rotten roots of the same rotten tree with rotten apples galore. There is no fixing this.

we HAVE to win the MIDTERMS so a DEMOCRAT MAJORITY can attatch a NON-BINDING RESOLUTION asking the GESTAPO not to wear MASKS to the OMNIBUS BILL that increases their FUNDING again

There’s too many words on the internet

you'll never get me to believe dems dont coordinate this shit to decide who can take the hit and vote for the fascist capitalist shit that they all also support and who gets to pretend they were against it

What ICE was up to in Minnesota before they murdered a woman

Nicolás Maduro Charged With Felony Oil Possession

Taking the swab and swirling it around the inside of both nostrils, then opening the Covid test vial and swirling the cotton swab around in the solution, and then snorting all the liquid out of the vial. 🙌

Please put the US under sanctions. Cancel the LA Olympics. No international conferences.

The answer is not “more polite regime change”

I’d be more receptive to CBS’s five simple values if each value had its own animal mascot.

In 2026 the bread is all sawdust and ergot and the circuses are all just housecats painted with tiger stripes.

Twenny twenny sex

The main thing that holds me back on social media is that I don’t have any damn opinions on stuff.

24 hour mailboxes, why does it take that long?

Guy who loves Black Sabbath but refuses to call Ozzy and Geezer anything but “John” and “Terence”

Santa is the world’s most successful alcoholic.

If you describe your first round of cannonball volleys against me as your “opening salvo”, fuck you.

28 Years Later (2025) Directed by Danny Boyle

Posting a video of a kids in the hall sketch overlaid with a video of me snarkily commenting: “Yeah, act completely insane towards strangers on the street, pretending to squish their heads even though all you’re doing is pinching your fingers in front of your face. Good job, you fucking genius.”

Imagine if there was a page dedicated to being written on with a pencil or pen.

Spiral Architect by Black Sabbath is a Christmas carol.