I will never be on time for anything

Zynning hard at the Carmel by the Sea ballet

I went from weed jar to drug tub

It appears I have quite the reputation amongst the locals

If you invite me over after dark you better have snacks

I prefer my booty calls to be at 10 am, not pm

Rainbow over Wharf 2 in Monterey on Wednesday morning. (Courtesy: Rich Pena)

iMessage limits group chats to 32 people so that is the cap on the Montergay clique die mad about it

Doing chores for friends is way more fun than doing my own

Am I the social glue or just a whore?

It only take 2 beers to get me drunk, and 2 years to undo the damage

You can only be my intern if you Zyn

I need more collared shirts

There’s a lot of new gays in the area which is perfect because my psychic told me I would meet my future husband next week

Gay bars playing porn on 1 screen and Sister Act on the other

I’d get on my knees for bad bunny

If I don’t make a triumphant return to the gym tomorrow someone please shoot me

Umm

HAPPY BIRTHDAY to my wife @casserolesoul.bsky.social

If there’s an option for all the toppings I will choose it

Will my inbox ever know peace?

I miss having a wife who would cook for me

5 years ago today I left Nashville for California for what I thought would be a short work trip 🤯

Shelby is charging her family admission to her wedding on a Tuesday at noon and has a whole business plan to make a profit off her family by charging the 2x at the hostel I’m so proud

Representation matters

5am Zyn

I will be drinking some chocolate milk tonight

Oomf keeps leaving their rock collection in the walkway and blaming a snow storm 2500 miles away

Ryan has finally healed his relationship with lesbians

i like it when ryan brushes his beard with his boar bristle brush like a little show pony

Welcome to my gay little world 😇🌈

Christian kids have the best glow ups

“To my dear friends and my faithful followers, @squeako.bsky.social has officially come to and end.” -Squeako

@squeako.bsky.social lost her phone in the gay club plz put her at the top of your prayer list

Daddy God why did you make me an enabler?

Big Gay Night Out as god intended

@squeako.bsky.social lost her phone in the gay club plz put her at the top of your prayer list

Dick availability in SF

I live to rescue oomf from a gross straight boy

Oomfs are stealing my spotlight at the gay bars

Literally all of my friends are hot

A Zyn for a ducky

Brown noise drowns all sins

Omg women are hot

I have no power in a lesbian bar

Of course i found coke in the Members Only jacket

I’m trying a radical new thing which is not folding my underwear before putting them in the drawer

I get distracted so damn easily