People visiting Jurassic Park:

Los Angeles/westside folks: Our foster dog, Hazel, got out tonight around 8:08 p.m., and we have not been able to locate her. Please keep an eye out--and if you see her, DO NOT CHASE. She is very timid and will not come to someone she doesn't know. PLEASE CALL/TEXT THE NUMBERS ON THE FLYER.

drake turning off the game as it gets to 18

If only TBS would tell me how many batters until Ohtani bats again

Sure sex is cool but have you ever found a new podcast with six years of episodes to listen to?

“Yeah I’m wearing a rainbow but CHRISTIANLY” is one of the weakest displays I’ve seen from a pro athlete in recent memory.

Can you tell I was very not in the mood to write about this team today

Kathryn Hahn is batting 1.000 in The Studio

R.I.P. to me being able to ignore it

I can’t believe this has to be said, but: You cannot tell the story of Jackie Robinson—as a ballplayer, serviceman, or human—without discussing our country’s history of racism. From Around the Horn:

Dodgers @ Cubs March 18, 2025: Opening Day in Tokyo as the Dodgers begin their title defense against the Cubs - By: Alex Campos dodgersdigest.com/2025/03/18/d...

I’m absolutely elite at waking up one (1) hour before my alarm

A DEI pick-six is crazy

Read the room, hydration app (we are fine and ready to evac)

Every single time somebody in Toronto says something dumb, Kendrick drops a huge surprise later that day

A nice surprise this morning

In a shocking development, sushi from Ralph’s is not the best that I’ve had

Awkward moment when you’re the only one in your section that yells “certified loverboy/certified pedophile”

L.A. area coffee shops having a normal one

Ordered five (5) ears of corn on instacart and got this. Anyone have any corn-based recipes

Had a v productive week of being sick (watched all three seasons of Hacks)

Assume he’s running for office in Topanga

A moment for everyone whose parents just asked them why they didn’t become a baseball player

Well Spiderman 2 was extremely good

See you all in hell 🫡

Nadja and Laszlo would be here but Colin Robinson would be on Threads

Worst part of these new social media apps is having to remember who to block