German hairy snails to you all this evening

Sally Wainwright not fucking around with Riot Women, bloody hell

@raynewman.bsky.social At this particularly susceptible time of year, there's been a mass grollacing in the city: www.instagram.com/reel/DRP3MoQ...

Feel better for a swim. Dammit

People putting Christmas decs up earlier every year isn't because they buy into marketing. It's a sign everyone is miserable and desperately needs something twinkly to feel slightly better about. Either way it's terminal capitalism rot, but still.

First properly good navel orange of the season 🍊🧡

We have a brilliant French marketing manager, who is so French. "We are focusing on things you can bring people to - your friends, your family, your lovers."

An alarm has been screaming outside on and off since 7am. I am duly alarmed.

Awful awful Kate. Most selfish woman in Ambridge, apart from the others #TheArchers

Hurray, no Kate, well done Phoebe #TheArchers

Sheep nonsense. Absolute toilet unless somebody dies #TheArchers

Thank god for Jakob #TheArchers

So all this fucking fuss and Roars was only planning a three day holiday? WTF #TheArchers

Oh FFS, if bloody Kate gets to be at the birth and the father doesn't I'll scream #TheArchers

Missed yesterday but I gather it was mostly Tom and Helen, who are basically unlistenable, so I won't bother catching up #TheArchers

Woman sitting next to me has the worst fucking persistent cough and throat clearing thing I've ever heard. I want to throttle her, partially for her own good

In the world's coldest room to do health and safety training. End me.

Seasonal strugglebus lifted at last night's @anonopin.bsky.social gig. A right laugh. Biggest opprobrium of the night for a man who thought the right way to eat fish fingers was to peel them first.

Feel like I'm dragging chains around like Jacob Marley this week.

HUGE BRAG here. My nieces wrote me notes. 28 years old they are

Ugh I hate it when horrible dreams are just so *plausible*. Why brain hate me.

Braxton Hicks, I loved her first album #TheArchers

Jakob, a sad indictment of addiction to grabby claw machines #TheArchers

Team Blackpool! #TheArchers

Justin sounds positively benevolent #TheArchers

I quite like this renegade plan B holiday that sounds more fun than the actual holiday #TheArchers

Och aye the noo, have ye packed yer Trossachs and polished the cranachan? I'm sorry to the entire Scottish nation and especially Mark Bonnar #TheArchers

Well worth taking half an hour out of my day to see the Mona Hatoum X Giacometti exhibition at Barbican.

This is his official 2025 holiday photo🎄

I'm meeting a Pogue this morning and I'm a bit excited

Do they mean white straight Anglo American masculinity? 2020 Scottish gay man 2021 South African man 2022 Sri Lankan man 2023 Irish man 2024 Woman www.theguardian.com/commentisfre...

Very much enjoying the collective cross-gender horn that's broken out for Mark Bonnar on #TheArchers 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿

Sigh. #TheArchers

Ugh, Helen flirting makes me feel bilious #TheArchers

Christ, somebody wants to share a room with Helen? I'd take my chances with Hazel #TheArchers

Tony is allowed a nice time but nobody else #TheArchers

Helen boring for Borsetshire #TheArchers

Bunk beds, like prison. Excellent #TheArchers

Peggy's ghost cackling and screeching #TheArchers #CursedHoliday

They're going to end up in the Dundee Holiday Inn, aren't they #TheArchers

Evening, have we all packed our own personal coffee machines? #TheArchers

They're talking about brain fog on the radio. Mine isn't hormonal, it's just knowing shit I wish I didn't know and an inability to stop distracting myself. Mmm, sweet obfuscating fog.

Having flashbacks to December in Tallinn last year when it got light at 9.15am and dark at 3.30pm, which was lovely because you could go in a sauna and drink glögi and eat cinnamon buns to cope.

Is this stupid badly-organised benighted holiday going to be delayed by another day every day this week? I hope so. #TheArchers

It's tough out there. Take this.

The Adults In The Room government of delivery, there. Announce a heinous idea and then have to immediately row it back (which they will). The competence, convincing. The chess, dimensional.

Woke up with this wonderfully mad Carol Channing performance. Some people do get it today. youtu.be/ecRVQM9Jyl8?...

Some things never stop being rubbish