Come on Everton

Ugarte is dog shit. Would bring Mainoo on every time over him. We should have won this by 2 or 3 goals.

I think this season may be the season Lenny Yoro really steps up. He's showing signs of being a quality footballing centre half in the mould of Des Walker or Rio.

I will judge this transfer window by who is in goal against Arsenal.

Considering the state of boxing these days, Usyk's next fight will probably be against Jake Paul in the Unification Battle of the Century.

Tragic story coming out of Spain. Thoughts with the family.

I'll judge you by your choice of watching the Main Stage Vs Other Stage right now

Trump is a paedophile and a rapist. He's also a massive senile old cunt. That should keep me safe from visiting.

Car park ticket machine keyboard. Anyone got any idea what is going on with this layout?

The Orcas who did this in the 80s looking at each other and rolling their eyes with a knowing smile while the young orca think they invented the fashion.

£9 for a Guinness at Co-op Live is a fucking disgrace.

Still buzzing from Pulp last night. I first saw them in 94 which was the first performance of a not yet finished Common People. 36 years later, and Jarvis is still as energetic and charismatic. Just the perfect front man.

Just back from watching Pulp for the first time since 1995. Jarvis is still a brilliant front man. Great night.

I'm sure this is Craftywank's plan all along. He has zero interest in working and just desperately wants to be a right wing "celebrity".

Good work, Blue Sky. I was number 6 for the record.

The at home assassination of a state lawmaker should be getting a bigger reaction from the President than someone throwing a rock at a Tesla dealership.

I think the fact they got Beavis and Butthead to commentate pretty much sums up the state of American science right now

Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!! Burn you fucker!

Have we finally reached the point where we call openly call the monstrous Israeli government a bunch of psychopathic murdering twats without worrying someone will say we are being anti-Semitic?

At last, Trump can claim his policies have finally made something cheaper for the average American.

Oh fuck off Ed Sheeran

My parade sucks cos Ukrainians blew up all my tanks. What's Donald's excuse?

I hope all the people protesting in the US actually voted. Surely if they did, they would have nothing to protest about?

How, in 2025, can old, psychopathic men start wars simply to keep themselves in power for a little longer? Why can't we have leaders who lead for the good of the planet.

I've actually just heard that orange fucktard say they need to rebuild bridges because EVs have batteries. He then said a diesel lorry can drive "from New York to LA and back a little bit" whereas an EV would have to "stop maybe 6 times". He's actually fucking demented.

🤦🏼‍♀️

If a US Senator is not safe from being handcuffed and detained for free speech, none of us are safe.

I guess a lot of you will not be aware of the names appointed to ACIP or even RFK himself, but the best description I have heard is it's like firing the top rocket scientists at NASA and replacing them with flat-earthers. Lots of people will die.

Fuck. Me. I've just heard Robert Malone, a man who once called me "an agent of chaos" on Twitter for calling out his antivax bullshit, has been appointed to the ACIP. This world is fucked. I am genuinely lost for words.

Typical social media bellend. I'm not sure why we need experts anymore when randomers online can confirm the cause of an incident within minutes if it happening.

What's your excuse now, Kier?

Musk Always Chickens Out

This is Max. He snuck out in the middle of the night and walked 5 miles to get a breakfast burrito from a store that gave him one once. They hadn't opened yet when he got there, but Max was found the next morning thanks to his GPS collar patiently waiting outside for his well-earned snack. 14/10

Take 2 minutes to watch this fucking legend

RFK is going to appoint the likes of Wakefield and McCullough on the vaccines advisory board isn't he? I've spent 5 years on Twitter fighting these outliers as they grift and lie. Never in my wildest imagination did I think they could be positions of power. Well done, Russia, you have won.

Does anyone currently have the monthly payments option showing on Amazon? I know they disappear occasionally, but I have not had them for ages.

I just had a play with a Lotus Eletre R. Fuck me that's a quick car.

Hey Donald, it's possible for people to protest AND to know you are a paedophile. Nice attempt at distraction though!

👇🏻

In a sane world, the majority of Americans will do the right thing in 3.5 years time. My question is, how the fuck would you go about unpicking whatever horrors are yet to be unleashed.

It's got to see the BBC have not wasted any money on using modern, convincing CGI for the new series of Walking With Dinosaurs and instead decided to reuse the same computers from the original 2013 series.

Fun fact, Canis lupus familiaris, is capable of detecting a block of cheese being removed from a fridge from up to 2 miles away.

Meanwhile, at the White House…

The lovely Tim Peake on TV reminds me of the time I met him and he accidently punched my then 8 year son in the face when he tried to take a selfie for us.

If Musk died from some mysterious ketamine overdose or clumsy fall from a window on the 30th floor, would you return to Twitter?

There's something about this can that I'm not too keen on but I can't quite put my finger on it

I probably have enough trainers. But one more pair surely won't hurt? Mexicana 68 Prototypes

Some incredibly bad attempts at Guinness last night