I think my mailperson forgot a step

Lawrence of Arabia 🤪

This is breaking containment. What do y’all know about Victor barber???

My bb Carlitos is a baddie

My cuddly lil demon 🥹

Can someone loan me $1000 so I can go to the next Knicks home game?

Hard To Watch based on the novel Stone Cold Bummer by Manipulate

Arsenal to Knicks… Spike, Zohran, and I all had the same day

My baby wishing me a Happy Mother’s Day

She deserved so much better

Good morning, world

Told my dad I updated my list of favorite albums and he asked if I was going to put out a press release so here it is:

A sad day in history. 111 years ago today, Father died when the Lusitania was torpedoed by a U-Boat off the coast of Ireland 💔

Happy 5/7 to all the guys on the apps that say they’re 5’9”. I see you for what you really are ❤️

The concept of David Lynch muse Kyle MacLachlan interviewing former Dance Moms star Maddie Ziegler

Said “intermission” instead of “halftime” while watching basketball with straight guys

Company introduced a new AI tool to help us with stuff and this thing is SCARY good

Good morning

This is going to cause a gay civil war

Told the cat he could spend the night in my bedroom as long as he behaves and he promptly responded by biting my ankle so we’ll try again tomorrow

God bless Jalen Brunson

The Met Gala theme being “fashion is art” feels very “My single ‘My Single Is Dropping’ is dropping.”

I want chicken wings so bad right now but I am wearing both a white shirt AND contact lenses. This seems like a recipe for disaster.

Oh no. I started looking at Zillow listings for apartments I deeeeefinitely can’t afford to buy 😮‍💨

So anyways, I had a chicken parm hero for dinner hbu?

🚨BATTLESTAR GALACTICA IS NOW ON PARAMOUNT+🚨

Watching Prometheus and I’m gagged. David spent his years in isolation watching and rewatching Lawrence of Arabia, just like me during COVID.

No other way I’d rather spend my Sunday afternoon

When you only eat dinner at strip clubs and Hooters:

“We Belong Together”

About to sit at the counter at my local diner while wearing this tracksuit - I might physically be 29 but spiritually I am 79

Like this?

Here is a Winnie the Pooh fancam set to “Honey” by Robyn

I accidentally fell asleep around 7ish and woke up at 10:30 so my body has no idea what’s going on now that it’s actually bedtime

Huge “hell yeah brother” to the guy that lives on the first floor of my building absolutely BLASTING “Tangled Up in Blue” by Bob Dylan right now

New Kacey slaps. We are so back.

My sister’s got jokes

We are a part of the Rhythmless Nation

Blasting the volume when the drum fill hits on “In The Air Tonight” >>>>>

Who are we casting?

My YouTube suggestions are getting weird…

Unfortunately we as a nation decided this was okay when we didn’t build a ballroom after Sandy Hook

I got new shoes and my cat is THRILLED

The theme round at trivia tonight is “famous holes”

Thought I was horny but it turns out I just wanted chicken wings

A bullfighter in Sevilla came out of retirement and got stabbed by the horn in his rectum, causing a 4-inch gash that needed to be fixed with surgery. This pic makes it look like the bull is roasting the man like a marshmallow. The mileage I’m gonna get out of this as reaction meme hehehe

My sleepy little baby 😭😩