I think everyone posting alarmist bullshit about socialism today should be required to give up their Social Security, Medicare, mortgage interest deduction, and free access to public roads

Catsimadis is going to move out of the city a THIRD time!

Oh my god the worst people in New York City are gonna be so mad tomorrow

Ok I’m going to do my own Michael Lange, I asked my late-middle-aged leftish but low-info super-normie Brooklyn friend who he voted for and he said “DiNapoli, Lander of course, and the one Mamdani is for, I don’t know how to say her name” it’s over

*greenpoint voice* motherFUCKer

uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Well I went to the DMV today in midtown Manhattan and I have some thoughts: 1) Cuomo really did transform the customer experience (not news if you’ve been there in the past 5 years), it no longer feels like a cage match with the worst people in the world (the customers I mean)

I yelled “what the fuck are you doing” at an oncoming illegal moped doing 30mph on the Manh Bridge bike path and the guy turned around, followed me for a half mile off the bridge, caught me at a light and threatened to kill me What are we doing here, folks

not for a second do these assholes think about who’s going to, say, maintain the HVAC systems while they’re busy ~innovating~, and what those people are going to eat

Love watching Michael Rapaport spin out of control bc a Knicks championship has taken over the city and he can’t enjoy it because his Mamdani derangement prohibits it

Hey New York City, look who’s having a crashout

Watching the “Chinese dinner” episodes of Maude from 1978 and JESUS CHRIST this is racist

they closed the FDR after 34th which means the city is near gridlock below 23rd, more than a mile above the parade zone

If Chotiner spoke to me this way I would just melt into a pool of, like, cat vomit on the floor, but when you’re stupid you’re invincible www.newyorker.com/news/q-and-a...

When you’re on the bed how does the cat KNOW that he’s allowed to climb on parts of you that have clothes on but not on parts of you that don’t have clothes on

Welp I just read someone saying in a Reddit thread about the NY-7 election that "a ban on foie gras is an actual attack on Jewish culture" so I think I should be allowed to go back to bed

Shopping for a motorcycle and growing anxious that I may end up having to deal with the giant, Motorcycle Mall of Belleville, New Jersey, which everyone agrees, to a degree that the tri-state area has never agreed on anything in the history of the world, is a gang of thieves

This guy looks like he wouldn’t just call 911 if you parked legally on the public street in front of his house, he’d shoot you in the face and dump your body in the woods and then call 911 to report a prowler

IRC, by a mile. The channels gayla and gaydc were lifesavers for me as a gay teen and young adult and I still have friends I met that way in the early 1990s

Here is a public service announcement filmed by the Dallas Cowboys in the 1980s, and I promise that you would not correctly guess who pops up at the end if I gave you 10,000 tries

I have to say I kind of like seeing the new Mamdanica typeface everywhere

The most amazing thing about this weekend: I live in Murray Hill Adjacent and even on a normal Sat night some sloshed mook from Massapequa drops some trash into my bike basket, last night NOTHING — it was genuinely a good-energy crowd

Not news but it’s still impressive how many people (and bots and paid disinformationists) are invested in a bad-faith narrative that NYC, which is safer than it’s been at any point in my lifetime (and I’m very likely older than you) is dangerous, crumbling, and on the verge of social chaos

I GASPED. When IT happens it’s gonna be just like this, just 2 digits and the borough changed

7 hours after the area cleared, there’s almost no evidence that any of this even happened, because employees of the half a dozen businesses directly abutting the impromptu party (some not even open last night) have been (and still are) out cleaning it all up as a public service

MEET YOUR RA'S

Dude I was just in a crowd that was blocking a bus and the girl behind me started chanting “MTA, MTA” and then the crowd parted to let the bus thru 😭 Greatest city in the world baby

Timeline rn: Fuck Wemby Wemby eat shit Fucking Wemby Wemby suck my d*ck You will wait longer for some A trains due to police activity at 42 St–Port Authority Goddamit Wemby

Tonight at least 500 people watching the Knicks game on outdoor screens outside two bars in Baruch Plaza

Look I know we were expecting NYC to be super Brazilian this weekend and it is in fact very, very Brazilian. But what I did not expect is that SARABETH’S would be this Brazilian

Voter number 9

My 17yo small-town nephew is in town visiting and saw the countdown clock for the M15-SBS and said “wait, they come that often? So you can just leave whenever you want and you know it’ll come soon” and YES, YES MY BOY, YOU HAVE LEARNED OUR SECRET AND SHALL BE ONE OF US

Anyone who doesn’t agree that tonight, after a quick thunderstorm, New York City is the most magical place in America can FUCK OFF

This story is all about the feelings of retired and nearly retired political elites – Erica González, Nydia Velázquez, Melissa Mark-Viverito. A lot of New York politicians think the purpose of government is to work for them, specifically, and their egos.

Look you *know* I’m a booster of the streets of this city and all the people on them, but I was in Times Square last night at 9:30pm and it was crazier than I’ve ever seen it outside of Christmas, avoid avoid avoid

Q: Climate policy? Bores: Clean energy infrastructure, tax credits Lasher: Polluters pay, coastal resiliency Conway: Endangerment finding, Local Law 97, NYSERDA energy plan Schlossberg: *clears throat loudly* WEBSTER’S DICTIONARY DEFINES “CLIMATE” AS www.amny.com/sponsored/yo...

I will say this as a frequent rider of the ancient cut-and-cover lines in the Manhattan core: they get -10 points for making you think about which side of the street to enter on, but +1000 points for “walk down the steps and there’s the platform!”

What

Knicks win AND a surprise new Los Tacos No. 1 in the neighborhood? Is it my birthday??

My 17yo nephew is staying with us, and I have to work but the rest of them are going to CONEY ISLAND because they hate themselves I guess?

Imagine watching the greatest game in NBA finals history and being like “what does the trans woman I find annoying online have to say about this?”

DAWG YOU LIVE IN NEW YORK. BE HAPPY. GET A JOB.

they should be slicing up these people's brains and putting them under a microscope after they die like wrestlers and NFL players man. chronic transphobic encephalopathy

We are so unbelievably close to this but on a parade float

So much free-floating normie pro-Mamdani energy right now. My late-70s neighbor out of nowhere goes, “Mamdani’s really handling this well with the kids,” and I cautiously ask what she meant, and it was that thing about the exec order about bedtimes and she was totally in earnest

Can’t understand why this product isn’t taking the world by storm

Look it’s annoying that NYC airport arrivals halls are full of scam artists but you can’t say the Port Authority isn’t earning people, you can see all these from one place in LGA Terminal C arrivals

My building management just sent out a message saying they’re taking civil unrest preparedness precautions beginning today through the end of next week Like come on

“killed in a bike lane by Vickie Paladino” is the new “run over by the Museum of Sex bus”

Last night I got a msg in the @littlebirdai.bsky.social prompt window that I’d hit my quota for the month on day 20 and I would be demoted to the “stupid and cheap” model until the 19th, did I want to upgrade? And I immediately ponied up an extra $80 a month I’m the AI bubble, it’s me