"The pen is mightier than the sword" "Okay nerd", imaginary Jordan says as she twirls around her rad as fuck pensword

A new spot T4 Tea opened up, and wow I need to find queer people to bring on dates here

Send this to someone who finds "new pronouns too confusing" to give them an aneurism

My lab's optimal environment is 68 F +/-1 degree, so it's wild how much of the time at work I'm thinking "6-7!" Or "Nice" as I monitor testing conditions

Omg I feel like a celebrity. *I'm* the GM who uses google slides as my default VTT. "Amazing use of one's free will" is a great way to describe how I do things 🥹

Under capitalism and climate disaster, ALL yuri is doomed yuri

We ordered some esfiha de carne (which are "beef pockets" on site/app) and they ran out, but this delivery is sending me. "Beef Pocket" is now my favorite term of endearment, like saying "awww I'm sorry, Beef Pocket"

Keep hearing devs say that they only use ai for "pre-concept art" There is no pre-concept art. There is concept art. That's where the idea starts. With the concept. You're using ai for concept art.

My beloved with midnight food delivery: "Your dasher is nearby? I'm unimpressed. I'm *fully* bi"

The world of youtube ad reads transitioning from Blue Apron (recipes and ingredients for you to cook bc you're so busy and tired) to Factor (microwave meals bc you're so busy and tired) is so bleak. We're close to miserable cold squeezes meals- Jk my tiktok's flooded with konjac jelly tube ads

My beloved's specific humor slays me so much

Dirtbags #17: Breaking Out Pt. I! Breaker is back, and he's joined by two very special guests, played by @jordandreamfish.bsky.social and @jonjonjon.bsky.social! Surely these three kids being experimented on comply and don't cause any trouble, right? player.captivate.fm/episode/bffc...

When bringing my beloved gummy and asking which they preferred they responded, "What?? I can't compare those" They're upsettingly funny

Mentally plummeting. Accepting affirmations

fishposting

Shadow the Hedgehog would never

Watching men on tiktok do cute silly dances is the most I've ever felt like a bird. This shit might be my one weakness I'm so enchanted

Can’t believe Dick Chaney couldn't even last four days into No Nut November

How dare someone write my biography behind my back (Drown the Stars, for those interested)

Full moon out. Time for the alphas to go awoo~

One of the hardest parts about having four partners people don't talk about enough is the perpetual state of "whaaaaaa I miss them ahhh!!!" Meanwhile some of the men I work with give "ugh my wife is annoying" noises

Since I don't expect too many likes, feel free to ask any questions 21 onward or make a question up and I'll be an open book

Sometimes you eat an edible and your brain systematically deletes all files and replaces them with a directive to Experience Digimon at all costs

I turned 30 today. Across my 30s I'll still be cringe, but like, in a cool way Plz say something nice 😭

New favorite thing as a GM - watching players go Game Theory™️ mode. Blessed to see that level of layered engagement for mysteries

When Sonic glomps Shadow do you think he calls it his "homie attack"

Fun fact: When Tony the Tiger says "THEY'RE GRRRRRRREAT!" He's actually talking about my nonbinary beloved.

From now on if anyone questions my lifestyle I can just respond, "because I'm not a salad".

I truly hate the idea of my labor hours as "contributing to society". I'm smart, funny, creative, adorable, and sometimes even friendly and the world could have 50 to 70 more hours of me in it a week if I didn't have to work. So much other shit I could be doing.

While watching Trump get upset is fun, I still think that South Park's "caring about stuff is uncool and should be mocked" was one of the worst things ever to happen to those of us in Generation X.

Okay yeah I hate doing this but yeah... Between medical stuff and trying school for a career change, there's been a rough dip setting us a couple thousand back. Anything helps, gosh I super appreciate ko-fi.com/jordandreamf...

Mess me up

It's kinkfest, sakuracon, and 420 in the PNW rn. I DO NOT have the time, purity, or eggs for Easter. Sorry FATHER

My grandparents gamble at casinos literally more than half of their conscious lives these days on some weeks. My parents play on more virtual casinos, literal casino apps and investments. Not me, I'm more evolved. I play mihoyo games, a gamble system *you can't even cash out of*.

Bridget Guilty Gear gender envy but very specifically when in ball

This feels like an Onion headline set-up, like "Tesla recalls Cybertrucks over stainless steel trims falling off. Replaces with more expensive carbon fiber trims to fall off"

"That's too many Jordans" - Jordan

Learning that I might have "blorbo rizz" like I'm some people's "emotional support character", and that may explain why I tend to match up and date sooooo many nerdy autistic ace folx. I dunno if I can ever recover from this information.

Samus Aran gender envy and body goals but very specifically the Morph Ball

I don't think I'll ever find myself comfortable, appreciated, or included, like with "my people". Which sucks because the circles I dwell in tend to be fantastic, and I think I'm fantastic, I just tend to be my least favorite part in any given social interaction Which sucks because I know I'm wrong

Neurodivergent pirate crew we call that ARRRtism

God the gender euphoria if I could horizontally float for a few seconds like Princess Peach

Real talk, people who have slut eras as they get older amaze me. I'm too tired bc work. I have no time bc work. And now there's swiping and vibing and timing and no spoons and I'm in my 20s but miss feeling young. I should be in peak slut era condition but my brain and calendar say no.

I like love and love likes 1 like = 1 thing I love

Sometimes using they/them pronouns because I dress like two halves of a lesbian blorbo dynamic

Yeah

Over the weekend I learned that when you're in dire need of a hug, you can just like, ask your loved ones and sometimes they say yes?? Did anybody else know about this?? This is huge for the mental health meta

Year 1 vs year 16 HRT idk maybe im new here

Ever go "ugh" when a shitty movie based on an IP dramatically kills a character and then shows "wait they're actually alive" in the post credits scene of the same movie? Anyways Tiktok season 2

My partner has shown me their fave anime, but they were so telling for their character of why it was these ones to show me. I love it when I *get* someone more by what they present and pebble. Maybe we should normalize huge playlists and vision boards of "You will see me".