FRENS

POV: you get to the sexual history part of the patient questionnaire

me after one (1) beer

it’s been a long year

“como te sientes?” yo:

remember this photo of luigi mangione with his cell mates? fun fact, the bald guy on the right is hugo carvajal barrios, former head of venezuelan military intelligence and most likely the one who gave maduro away

thanks everyone who’s reached out. 💙🇻🇪 family and friends in caracas are all safe. one of the airstrikes hit a communications tower about 1500ft from my childhood home at around 0200L this morning but thankfully no one was hurt, just a couple broken glasses.

everything reminds me of him

what a fucking year :D

got front row tickets to see Sue perform at the new year’s eve show tomorrow night. so excited

my resolution for the next year is to guard my peace. that’s it, that simple.

proof of life ✌🏻

my laptop RAM died on me and, with it, my executive function to do anything about it :3

please think twice before buying someone a B-52 stratofortress for christmas

there’s an alternative reality out there where big bird died on the challenger disaster

what being used as a rubber gimp taught me about b2b saas sales

its fandom-themed day at work and i forgot to bring my pup hood

MY SHOES KEEP CREATING STATIC ON THE OFFICE CARPET AND I KEEP SHOCKING MYSELF ON EVERY METAL SURFACE I TOUCH AND I WANNA SCREAM

this is a yawn, you are now yawning

what are y’all doing for toyotathon this year

hey all you cool cats and kittens

hiccups! in the office

every new interaction i have with furries further convinces me that they are the nicest people on the planet

big fan of congratulatory social media posts that look like obituaries

pop culture media outlets love to make posts like “[celebrity] stuns in new photo” meanwhile the celebrity is like “😐”

nooo that’s my emotional support gas station grilled cheese

big fan of congratulatory social media posts that look like obituaries

honestly love videos of random people from all over the the world doing mundane activities like grocery shopping or commuting showing how every day life is in their countries

i have been invited to a durian opening tomorrow

i can’t take another BREAKING headline today please

propanolol? propanolol

want this bumper sticker I saw today

hey all you cool cats and kittens

Tried to order an espresso martini at Atlanta’s state-subsidized cocktail bar and they looked at me weird and kicked me out of the building. 🍸 1/5 stars. Will not be coming back. 🙄

hi i’m renata bliss and I'm your freestyle dance teacher

🚨 QUESTION PROMPT 🚨 What was your first automobile?

me looking at my pile of laundry i need to fold

how do you politely tell a hookup that they have massively overstayed their welcome?

can i say something without everyone getting mad? i’m bored of pizza

forbidden egg nog

bork

normalize euthanasia because it’s monday

if you’re cold, they’re cold bring your twinks inside

this is a mistletoe, you have to make out with me. i don’t make the rules

work perks: crying room

my current relationship with my ex is back and forth 2FA whenever one of us gets logged out of eachother’s streaming platform accounts