my mom made me take latin when i started high school in 1998 and now i’m a professor of classical languages

the romans, who famously developed the arch, the pantheon dome, and the basilica, liked the flat roof

john travolta, unprompted: i shower in my dishwasher, every day

lol it took until the 2010s for some harvard non-classics white guy to come with “the thucydides trap?” classicists have been teaching this stuff since plato’s academy. euripides saw this shit in real time. read some kagan if you don’t have the greek (pub. 2004) www.thriftbooks.com/w/the-pelopo...

it’s too often forgotten that SPACEBALLS began and ended with “episode 11”

@jasonkirk.fyi we still have plenty of worthy bbq spots but goddamn www.al.com/news/2026/05...

lost it when he starts drinking adult blood

the dough/oven guy just pulled out the big pizza peel for the by-the-slice pies!!!

put the guy in prison, dawg, that’s it. that’s the thing we need

SHE

this last point – a sign of disrespect and indeed contempt – is the true spirit of the damnatio: a visual reminder of what used to be and what no longer is. erasure as good fucking riddance. we all know what *was* there (memoria), and we rejected it vituperatively (damnatio)

my dad would call this “reaching around your ass to scratch your elbow”

there’s a lot to love in this story, but for me it’s always been the poor barfly who screams “I HATE THIS SONG!” at his own lap

my dad would call this “reaching around your ass to scratch your elbow”

reentering earth communication after 40 minutes from the back side of the moon now fluent in nine languages, including proto indo european (PIE)

that scene in apollo 13 where hanks gets so fed up with this shit that he rips off his biometric sensors and then paxton and bacon follow their commander’s example

cheap beer is best from: 1. a can 2. a keg 3. whale shit 4. a bottle 5. the bottom of the ocean

my iran address polled very well with the three bloodthirsty vampires who wrote it

freud was actually right about a lot of stuff

@bubbaprog.xyz lol st. john’s drummer in shades and eye black just groovin’

i’m a professor of greek and latin literature and having a hard time remembering what the greek word for “lightning will never strike me’ is

kicker here is basically daniel craig introducing the weeknd on snl

It’s hard to blame woke DEI when the military is losing a war because of the straits.

[professorially] and universities

A 60 second pause to start the Charleston-Pittsburgh USL match as negotiations between the USL and the USL Player's Association are at a critical point, before an upcoming possible player's strike

@celebrityhottub.bsky.social @edsbs.bsky.social hey guys, did you know that florida football defeated the college of charleston 78-0 on nov. 4, 1912, and cofc promptly folded its football program? www.sports-reference.com/cfb/boxscore...

markwayne mullin answers reporters’ questions after his southeast louisiana lions are bounced from the first round of the southland conference tournament for the fourth straight year

since herodotus, cannibalism is bound up in making foreign people the Other. it’s in the odyssey. it’s the oldest form of xenophobia. see 👇🏻

“ESCALATOR OUT OF ORDER, TEMPORARILY STAIRS HEARD THAT”

anytime i’m advising a student and the inevitable “why classics?” question comes up, i mention ted turner

i co-run a student reading group on herbert smyth’s greek grammar and today we learned that FAFO qualifies as a future more vivid condition (present imperative protasis, future indicative apodosis): (if you) fuck around, and (you will) find out

happy midterms and spring break travel conflict requests season to all my colleagues who celebrate

short track relay speed skaters and velodrome cyclists share the same fucked up psychologically of “we’re chasing them but they’re also chasing us.” truly cursed sports

they call it “skeleton” luge because “severe spinal injury junkies” didn’t focus group well

if you perpetrate something this heinous in a greek tragedy, all of your friends and family wind up dead and you’re left to live with the aftermath

[frontinus watching modern olympic sledding events and shaking his head] that’s too much drop across that distance, but you can’t argue with channel curvature over topography

Rest in peace to one of the great bloggers and the de facto mayor of Philadelphia. It was my honor and pleasure to work with him. defector.com/dan-mcquade-...

here is dan mcquade’s last appearance on the distraction, where he talks about his diagnosis and fatherhood open.spotify.com/episode/3PhL...

gonna tell my mythology students i got called a dirty little boy by a podcast on my morning commute

there’s a first time for everything i guess

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It can be a hard pill to swallow but you have to accept that while you will prevail in this struggle, you may not be there to witness it.

wearing these horrors into the classroom and immediately getting cooked by 23 college sophomores

i’m jason bourne and i just eluded the entirely of paris police in a fiat pos. this hot woman in the passenger seat next to me is going to cut her hair and wash her hands, for the male gaze

gift link. for those who haven’t read a lot of roth, this is the angriest thing of his i’ve read defector.com/fascists-are...

we’re bringing back covid era instruction, which everyone involved fucking hated, but now the threat to public health is stephen miller’s baby snatching squad

HE EVEN BUMS HER A LIGHT

plato’s instructor socrates, in his self defense speech that led to his execution, explicitly recognizes our universal and shared basic humanity, regardless of where you’re from. he also engaged in civil disobedience against inhumane government policy. socrates died in defense of the social contract

“women wept” is literally the final line of the fucking iliad

if i’m gm of the twins i’m getting whoever hurled this snowball in for first pitch on opening day of the 2026 season