Good morning! Shhhh. Karl is still sleeping

Democracy is dying, but at least last night's rain puts an end to 3 weeks of nonstop humidity. So at least we have that going for us.

📣 PSA for those going to this Foggy #Folsom: You still need sunscreen when I'm around - otherwise you're gonna end up with a very weird sunburn for a very long time

This is the rapture

ANNOUNCEMENT: I'm officially throwing my hat in the ring. Reasons I should be your next supervisor... 🌎 Most tenured resident in the Sunset (by thousands of years) 🧥 Can accurately represent the needs of the 365 day jacket wearing contingency ☁️ Greatest provider of shade in SF

Can you hear that? It's the sound of me walking back my words

Everyone in SF tonight as they're turning on the heat and finding a 4th blanket to sleep under: "There's gonna be a heat wave? Tomorrow? As in... one sleep?"

Sorry for the tears this morning, just crying about <gestures broadly at everything in America>

Disgustingly sunny or gloriously foggy, you should definitely swing by this Thursday to walk around the Dunes and pay homage to me 🚶🏻☁️🚶🏽‍♀️☁️🚶🏾‍♂️☁️

😶‍🌫️ Sure, we’ve seen the sun over the last few days but it’s FOGUST, baby, and it’s a great time to Visit Sunset Dunes™️ with @karlthefog.bsky.social and grab free Sunset Dunes posters (get there early - while supplies last). Next Thursday, Aug 21 5-7pm at Noriega.

What bridge?

✔️ Work every day for a month ✔️ Break 40+ year records ✔️ End ☁️No Sky July☁️ with a bang

4 weather phrases everyone should know ☁️🌈

And then the fog said, let there be sky, and there was sky

"The coldest winter I ever spent was the summer of 2025 in San Francisco" -Mark Twain

🚨 BLUE SKY sighting - enjoy it while it lasts! You won't see it again until next week

📊 Today in SF (by the numbers) 129,573: dogs walked 2,181: matcha lattes consumed 304: jackets purchase by tourists 27: shots of fernet poured 0: minutes of sunshine

When I said No Sky July, I meant it

I joined TikTok where I'm making Oscar-worthy gems like this. Find me over there as I continue to be the coolest part of this city. 🥶 ⏰ @ karl_the_fog

Not to brag but I think I've made this one of the coldest summers in the history of San Francisco and I'm so proud of myself all that weight training paid off

Making a rare peace offering: You can have tonight since I've made it the coldest summer in like 479 years

Just your typical temperate range for a city that's only 7x7 miles

Tonight will be miserable because <gestures broadly> and also your apartment will feel like it's on fire

Karl the Boat has launched. cc @karlthefog.bsky.social www.sfchronicle.com/totalsf/arti...

Miserable weather today in San Francisco. Here's a live glimpse of everyone suffering in Hayes Valley.

That's our undefeated San Francisco Giants tyvm Odd year magic here we come

Today's forecast: 🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵 with a high chance of 🤬🤬🤬🤬 in the late afternoon, followed by 🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠 later this evening

What's the ideal length? 6"? 7.5"? 8"? (the distance between the fan and your head when you sleep tonight)

It's our one warm day of the year; good luck finding a place to eat outside tonight

🌈🌈🌈

Floating in solidarity with Ukraine 🇺🇦

Fog isn't sounding so bad after tornados and tsunamis

Today's forecast: mostly downpours with a high chance of ordering pizza

This week is the perfect opportunity to catch up with your friends couch and soup

Grey sky > Blue sky

Expected outdoor temp on Sunday: 80F Expected temp inside your apartment on Sunday night: 164F

I love blue skies. I love hanging out with them, blocking them, making you think they don't exist anymore because you haven't seen one in weeks. I love them.