Does everyone that takes a pic with Trump just look like Jim from #TheOffice now? Like "oh well here he goes again"???

So no one noticed my ##StarTrek cosplay at work or wished me a happy Star Trek day...but I'm not bitter... Happy fuckin Star Trek Day or whatever 🤷‍♀️

I've said it before, and I'll say it again... People are just NOT feeling me today...🤷‍♀️

Guys! Umm...I think our new crazy stepdad wants us to get him a Nobel Peace Prize for Christmas...🤷‍♀️

Friendly reminder that it's sundress season and that isn't an invitation to comment on women's bodies or otherwise be a gross fuck. We're just trying to be comfortable. No love, Your irritated neighborhood Allycat

Guys, guys, not in front of lil' JD.

RON SWANSON WAS NEVER A HOMOPHOBE OR A MISOGYNIST! I WILL DIE ON THIS HILL. like are we even watching the same show???

🌮🌮🌮🌮🌮🌮

Time to post it again.

Facts

Facts.

If your Star Trek character doesn't play an instrument, what are you even doing???

So idk how to organize this, but I feel like if we don't all flood the White House with tacos right now, it's somehow a missed opportunity... #TACO 🌮🌮🌮🌮🌮🌮🌮🌮🌮🌮🌮🌮🌮🌮🌮🌮🌮🌮🌮🌮🌮🌮🌮🌮

Is there like a rule saying all Christian rock bands are required to have 12 lead vocalists and at least 4 guitar players?

The new para in my room asked me "Ms Gray what animals do we have out front? It's chickens and umm...penguins???" They're ducks BTW, so... Scenario A- She can't visually tell the difference between ducks and penguins. Or Scenario B- she thinks a public school in podunk GA has a penguin budget...🤔

So when you say "Teacher Appreciation Week" you really meant Teacher Appreciation for Monday and Tuesday and then we kinda got bored and lost interest and wandered off???😅

Hats off to #minecraftmovie for preemptively "Rocky Horror"ing themselves. Way to steer into the skid guys 😉

This one's good for one day only!🤣🤣🤣

Damn it Gilly! I don't need your whole life story just give me an oven temp!!!

Kid understood the assignment...

Bitch never listens...

Clark and Plop...ugh, talk about a downgrade...

🤷‍♀️

Constant fight or flight mode these days

See...what had happened was...

We're days away from watering our crops with Gatorade...

Myself and the Pah-Wraiths should've been the villains in #Picard Season 3. Red eyes, red door, a galaxy in flames - COME ON! However, crooked Paramount robbed us and put the Borg behind the red door instead. WE WERE ROBBED! #ReleaseThePahWraithCut

Every once in a while, out of nowhere, my Alexa will say "I'm sorry I don't know that." When no one has asked a question... So NO I'm not worried about the government spying on me. I'm worried about a bunch of ghosts with unanswered questions! 👻

Deceased 🤣💀

Nailed it…

Friggin Alabama

Lord, beer me strength!

The world is burning down. Post ships

😉

🥳

Fact.