First theater movie of '26

If anyone is interested in my picks for the 15 worst movies of 2025 (because I am benevolent, I did not do 20), an annotated guide is up at my Substack bsquad.substack.com/p/the-worst-...

The idea that Thanos is the real protagonist of Infinity War is easily one of the dumbest lies that the MCU packaged for its truest-believer fans to disseminate.

2016 / (almost) 2026

My year-end stats are sort of an exercise in swinging from pride to shame. I saw 219 movies in theaters! (🫡) I watched 516 movies in total. (I should probably read more.) I had pieces at 10 different outlets! The total number of pieces actually kinda makes me feel like a churn-rate hack.

Once, when my daughter was a toddler, she put on my shoes, walked down the hall, and called out, "Hey Jesse, I'm taking a shower." It's the hardest I've ever been roasted.

Here it is... the 10-year-old's ranked list of the 33 new releases she saw in theaters throughout 2025.

Xmas Eve Challenge

Upon further review, it doesn’t look like it’s playing anywhere near here. This is a huge bag fumble. I know my people. They’ll come out to see a film partially set at that weird historical site near the airport where they teach you how to make soap on field trips.

For us, the action is the juice. If you weren't sick of me hearing me go on about HEAT, that's just one of twelve holiday '95 movies that grossed over $50 million domestic that we discuss on the latest episode of the Sports Alcohol dot com podcast! www.sportsalcohol.com/the-sportsal...

This might sound judgmental but I just don't know if people should be *that* psyched about Cher consistently Doing the Least

this is the most "Get a Job, Stay Away From Her" I've ever felt

My outlier pick of the year is about stones, rocks, things of that nature

If you're interested in my (current) list of the 15 best movies of 2025, as well as some other superlatives, it's posted with a bunch of others on the A.V. Club's collection of best-of-the-year ballots. www.avclub.com/best-films-2...

AVATAR: FIRE AND ASH brings James Cameron into uncharted territory: the threequel. www.avclub.com/avatar-fire-...

Normally when someone prolific and well-loved like Rob Reiner passes, my instinct as a critic is to recommend a lesser-seen gem. Reiner has no lesser-seen gems. That's not an insult; his gems -- eight of 'em! Better than a lot of Oscar winners! -- everyone saw and loved.

You see me doing thrillseeker liquor-store holdups with a "Born to Lose" tattoo on my chest? www.polygon.com/heat-pacino-...

Hi-ho!

I took E to an R-rated movie today and was absolutely LIVING for the genuine panic in her eyes and voice when a red band popped up before one of the trailers. She didn't even know what it was, she just sensed there was danger!

Oh fuck it's the mystery team!!! lionsgatelimited.com/products/mys...

Family/decor

Instead of just bragging to my group text, I wrote about how much my Stubs A-List membership saved me on moviegoing this year—more than $600! 🤘 www.goodhousekeeping.com/holidays/gif...

E likes a lot of SNL sketches, seems to enjoy their music videos, often laughs at Andy Samberg, loved HOT ROD... but she just cannot abide "Space Olympics."

It's been a rough fall for mainstream horror and yet apparently the nights at Freddy's will continue until morale improves. Dropping the one-star bomb on this non-movie garbage: www.theguardian.com/film/2025/de...

It brings me no joy to report that I have written my first F review for The A.V. Club www.avclub.com/five-nights-...

I don't use the evil Spotify so I'm going to just list my five favorite albums of the year and I'd love to hear that (or yr favorite songs) from you all! 1 Year of the Slug / Caroline Rose 2 If You Asked for a Picture / Blondshell 3 Moisturizer / Wet Leg 4 The Clearing / Wolf Alice 5 I Quit / HAIM

I watched the first 30 minutes of MR. HOLLAND'S OPUS last night. The next day, the Disney+ account made me sign back in, as if to say, "that didn't seem like you." When I got back in, it had advanced the movie from the 30-minute mark to the end, as if to say, "OK, let's get you to bed"

Happy Thanksgiving! If you want to BYOBond marathon before the 007 movies leave Prime on Monday, I ranked them all for GQ (Gentleman's Q). www.gq.com/story/the-be...

I'm a little weirded out by the absolute blitz of a resurgence in Peanuts merchandising over the last few years but also it is weird and cool that I can get a tiny plush of Snoopy's goofy cousin Olaf. Now give us Marbles!!

Do you ever think about what an incredible song "Sympathy" by Sleater-Kinney is?

I did some reporting on whether or not the bunny kisses the fox or as you might prefer to call it, a review of ZOOTOPIA 2 www.thedailybeast.com/obsessed/fin...

I saw INITATIVE, the five-hour play that's (sort of) about Dungeons & Dragons, last week. Then I talked to the writer and director about how exactly you pull that off. www.theguardian.com/stage/2025/n...

The whole thing is like this, TBH, this is just the the sequence where it's somewhat less boring (still very bad though)

The New Flesh episode on THE RUNNING MAN turns into kind of a post-mortem on a movie that didn't sit well with any of us -- Brett, me, or our pals at @authorizedpod.bsky.social, Andrew and Hannah, who sat in for a really fun talk! podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/t...

Taking this literally and going to my Letterboxd to find out something I've seen *exactly* six times. BIRDS OF PREY. The Harley Quinn movie where there's also Ewan McGregor.

It's nearly Ella McCay season

Does this make me the biggest KEEPER fan in the world

Had a great time talking with @durwoodclapper.bsky.social and @meryanroe.bsky.social on Movin' Right Along, where I learned a lot about those ribbons tied to fans in movies, what spirits ACTUALLY say in Field of Dreams, and whether or not I'm related to Johnny Fiama. www.toughpigs.com/movin611/

You all need to answer the following ten questions about your last BlueSky post

I write a fair number of movie retrospectives and one of my trademark hack moves is offering some ridiculous quasi-context for a movie's box office, e.g. in 1995 CASINO made slightly more money than MAN OF THE HOUSE with Chevy Chase and significantly less than the seemingly reviled SABRINA remake.

Doesn't Amy Adams deserve a good rom-com? Is LEAP YEAR that movie? Even if you know the answer to that question, I think you'll enjoy this conversation, in celebration (?) of the movie's recent 15th anniversary (?!?).

Can you make a movie entirely out of second-act problems? @rockmarooned.bsky.social says yes! www.avclub.com/wicked-for-g...

Very sad to hear about @pastemagazine.bsky.social shutting down all of its non-music sections today. Will forever be grateful for the opportunity to write everything I did for their Movies section, and especially for the amazing @jacoboller.bsky.social’s trust and support on each of those pieces.

This brings to an end my couple of years as an associate film editor at Paste. I had an astonishing amount of freedom there as both a freelancer and later in my part-time gig, and the sheer number of movies they were willing to review or otherwise cover put a lot of movies-first pubs to shame!

Today, Paste Magazine shuttered all its non-music verticals, a choice I am both professionally and personally heartbroken about. Sadly, I am once again looking for a place that wants to let me write about Books and TV on the regular, so hit me up if that’s you or anyone you know.

Can Amy Adams be unlikable? Tune in next week to find out!

There aren't a lot of reviews out for KEEPER yet because Neon didn't screen it very widely, but I was randomly lucky enough to get into see it for The Guardian and it seems like I liked it more than most! Simple stuff, well done, with pervasive eeriness. www.theguardian.com/film/2025/no...

And we're never gonna tour again No, we're never gonna tour again

You've heard of Barbenheimer, but today I did Predimental Value (seeing two Elle Fanning movies in one day).

Kiddo's first PREDATOR movie