As if the name change to Department of War wasn’t bad enough, now he’s writing his title in parseltongue. 🐍

The entertainment journos writing stories about how the Stranger Things actors look too old for their roles need to look at a 1987 high school yearbook and find just one student who looks younger than 35.

On this Turkey Eve I want to give you some sage advice: Don’t experiment on Thanksgiving. You experiment by your damn self.

Valentine’s Day 2026 outside Gracie Mansion:

Mamdani making mental notes on how he’ll redecorate when his time comes.

Zohran has done more for America in 3 weeks than Chuck Schumer has done his entire career.

Equal rights.

WHY IS A 104 YEAR OLD MAN GOING TO HIGH SCHOOL?!?!

Post a book you love from the 80s. No explanations, no reviews, just covers.

Lots going on but from outside it seems that at least part of the calculus was that flight disruption for middle class and up travelers matters more than life disruption for untold numbers who’ll be deprived of health care.

Ok, let’s do this

“Can I stay home from school? I frew up.”

Duolingo should do a promotion with Petty Pricing™️

Democratic party leadership has been on autopilot for ten years, they weren't losing to fascism, fascism isn't popular enough for them to lose to fascism, they were allowing it to fill the void where their leadership should have been. Tonight we're seeing that we have other options. They should too.

jUsT LeT mE kNoW wHaT i CaN dO: Move, bitch, get out the way.

Ackman trying to make fetch happen:

If Mamdani is able to win and achieve the things that he wants to achieve while in office, the entire Democratic Party is going to be in shambles (good) because it’ll show that things are possible, they just don’t want to do them.

Got a little queasy & sad this morning thinking how full of hope I was on the first Tuesday in November a year ago.

So was the pardon signed with autopen?

The “Lincoln bathroom” looks like a marble tomb.

Give me your huddled racists yearning to flee

It’s a king cake! It’s a hemorrhoid pillow! It’s a combination king cake hemorrhoid pillow! #crochet #mardigras

A reminder, as always, that Jeff Landry is a USL grad. And beyond his general suckitude and constant "NOTICE ME SENPAI" pleas to Trump, he is also purposely trying to cause harm to LSU out of simple college football fan spite.

From the USDA official government website. Assholes.

Treated myself to a mango Jarritos & scanned the QR code on the bottle which took me to this cute vid, perfect for Taco Tuesday. #RespectTheTaco

This MUST be STOPPED. apple.news/AULV0clkCTVy...

Fascists HATE seasoning.

I know it’s frowned upon to share stuff from the hellsite, but I just read the perfect clapback & had to share.

George Santos about to show up at a No Kings rally tomorrow.

I wish we had a stronger name for the No Kings protests because even the countries with kings these days have universal healthcare, paid leave, and a strong social safety net.

Live your life so people say “awww” not “!AHAHAHAHA!”

If we matched the energy & focus of the “misinformation machine” with an “information machine” we could end this nightmare.

I’ma laugh my ass off when the Portland Frog wins the Nobel next year.

Surely we’ll see a strong Democratic response to the Qatari Air Force base ON US SOIL.

Comments are disappointing

You’ll never convince me we’re not bombing drug boats at the behest of whatever competing cartel is bribing Trump by buying his crypto coin.

Most Americans do not give a damn about a government shutdown, but it’s the top story. Most Americans would care about POTUS telling the top military leaders to take action against our own people, but it’s barely addressed.

Still yammering about the government shutdown when the president instructed military leaders to perform military actions against US citizens this morning is INSANE. Why isn’t anyone SCREAMING?!?!

Trump & Hegseth just told top military leaders it’s time to make war on U.S. citizens & it’s crickets from the Democratic Party. The cowardice & fecklessness is disgusting. You have some governors & congresspersons willing to fight but party leadership does nothing but hold them back.

Wanna be great? Here is an amazing footprint for success:

This is all Anthony Weiner’s weiner’s fault.

oh no look what i found on my front porch this morning i’m being targeted by radical Ole Miss fans i don’t feel safe going to work until monday #geauxtigers

ICE wrote “anti-ICE” on that bullet. “FUCK ICE” would have been more believable.

So what time is He picking y’all up today?