// channeling the dilf muse like fucking chakras CMON OLD MAN TIME TO WAKE UP

Ain’t never treated so many stupid, fortune-seeking folks for heat stroke than I have in the last few weeks here at the Chasm. Y’all… Please don’t be reckless today, no matter where you are in the world. Stay inside.

If y’all would just listen t’me when I lecture ‘bout heat exhaustion…

₊⊹⁀➴ 𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘭𝘥 𝘭𝘰𝘰𝘬𝘴 𝘨𝘭𝘰𝘳𝘪𝘰𝘶𝘴 𝘪𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘯𝘰𝘸. 𝘗𝘶𝘳𝘦 𝘸𝘩𝘪𝘵𝘦, 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘭𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘮𝘰𝘰𝘯. 𝘈 𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘧𝘦𝘤𝘵 𝘣𝘢𝘤𝘬𝘥𝘳𝘰𝘱 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘣𝘭𝘰𝘰𝘥𝘴𝘩𝘦𝘥 .ᐟ ↓ ↓ #girp #genshinrp

Another day, another smith lookin’ at me like I’ve lost my everlovin’ mind when I tell ‘em I want the blade dulled, not sharpened... Listen, pal, you want the trauma dump or the payment? Get it done, damnit.

Y’know, it’s funny. Sometimes when I give someone a good whack with my sword, their skull makes this hollow, empty noise… Figure that’s as good an IQ test as any.

It’s a whatnow Sunday..?

Yeesh.

/Sir/? … Ah. Medic leans his weight back, grinning, watching the other’s hand for a good moment before his eyes flick up to his face. “You are so damn eager to make a fool’a yerself I almost feel like I should letcha,” he rumbles. “Gods have mercy, boy… You ain’t answered a single one’a my +

// jesus ……..

// i sincerely did not know medic was the ‘ok, then beg’ kind of bastard until right this very moment and wowza sexy old man

… Mildly entertained little eyebrow raise. “Your fancy-pants hydro come with all the natural vitamins and minerals as the real thing? That didn’t answer my question, neither.” An exaggerated sigh, because okay, he gets the vague sense there’s more to this conversation than H2O. +

Extremely deadpan stare. “Boy, you’re exactly the type’a person I’m tryna preach to, here… When’sa last time you had water? Not tea or nothin’. Water. Yesteryear? Pre-birth?” (He is oblivious. And tired. Forgive him.)

Oh, mercy… I worry for y’all. Don’t worry ‘bout the big words, kid. Just drink water. Hydrate.

Y’all don’t need religion. Ya need electrolytes.

If I gotta pull one more research-y type from Sumeru outta some half collapsed cave, I’m gonna pitch a fit. Y’all read one book and think yer tough…

I’ll be out ‘round the chasm for the next good while, I’m thinkin’. Half the folks I’m treatin’ are getting hurt there. Might as well take the triage to them.

// sry but whoever the fuck medic’s faceclaim is……. he’s hot asf . 10/10

// MEDIC??? i thot his muse was dead……..

Folks, it’s hotter’n the ass end of a skillet out here. Drink water. Not your weird berry juice. Not your ciders. Water.

° 「 I f a 」 ° Anyway, back on topic. Wait a second, I lost my train of thought... What were we talking about again? ° ───────↬❦↫─────── ° ↠ Indie Canon/AU Portrayal ↠ Further Info in Thread ↠ One of the many #GhostsOfJohn

I ain’t looking for trouble. But every time I turn around, it’s sitting there, waggin’ its damn tail like it wants me to take it home.

// loving the fact i made medic almost 40-45 so he can call other characters kid and boy…… finally, a dilf

It’s getting cold. Might have to start thinkin about finding four walls and a roof.

// lord it’s so nice to write an idiot character for once LMFAO

I want to be gentle, I want to die gently, but it seems that when life gets hard I have to get harder to match.

Also it’s a piece’a rusty shit right now and swords are god damned expensive these days.

Lot of folk get real attached to their swords and whatnot. Can’t say I do. Wish I didn’t have to sling one in the first place. Don’t like carrying something purpose-made to cause pain.

// reminder that i don’t do drama and you’ll never see anything related to it on my acc if i can help it 👍

// I PROMMY ILL GET TO ACTUAL REAL REPLIES my brain is fried and my basement is soggy

My god damned electro vision can NOT bring people back to life. I don’t know how that became an assumption, but it’s wrong. And even if I could… I wouldn’t.

Why in the name of all things good is the game in Liyue so… Feisty?! I’m gonna have bruises for weeks. Fuck boars.

“Insulting? Diagnosing. Them things got /infections/.” And he’s also broke, but whatever. “I reckon I’d do just about the same anywhere. For the record, I didn’t even know this was Liyue when I touched down.”

Promise? Why do I gotta PROMISE? I hand ‘em the Mora, they hand me the food. But it always just becomes this bizarre debate over price and sales and it’s just— Why? Your fish look like shit. Don’t haggle with me.

… It’d be a lot easier if the customs made /sense/. Feels like I’m handing over my soul when I’m just trying to get some sustenance. I miss rations sometimes.

I hardly say a word to these folk, anyway. I figure I’m well safe from that clerical nonsense. Either way, what’s gonna happen? The dragon gonna come ‘n gobble me up? He’s dēād, brother.

Just sitting there on a small ledge in town, with a cat that’s decided to hang out with him for the moment. “This place is a lot.” “Mrrew.” “Yeah, you’re pretty used to it though, huh?” “Mrra.” “Probably easier when you can hang out on roofs and under porches.” “Rrreo.” “Pretty clever.”

Contracts don’t mean shit if you don’t sign ‘em.

… At least she’s good lookin’, though.

… Yeah, naw. Me and justice don’t play nice.

I mean, it’s rough that he’s dead and all… But a dragon? Man. We just had some bi— … Lady. Some lady.

Wish my land’s god was a dragon. That’s cool as heck.

// while i work on replies….. pls help me make this man like men more

// was trying to make a ship tier list for this mf and realized i accidentally made him lean BIG TIME towards women ….. need a man to seduce him ASAP

i will have vengeance i will have salvation

// accidentally made medic kind of a cowboy and I’m rollin with it. yeehaw

Medic heard them before he saw them. Laughing, loud and obnoxious— the scrape of weapons against stone. Treasure hoarders, probably. This stretch of road is known for them. Travelers make easy targets if they’re unaware. He sighed with disapproval. If he cuts across here, maybe he can +

// me only just now remembering to actually give him a height