@halfmoonjoe.com watching It Follows for the first time, and god bless you for enduring this with your parents in the theaters. Toughest battles to the strong soldiers 🫡

Bold of them to assume that I’d know what music Elliott plays in his house.

I suck in for selfies

At the point in my life where I’m getting suggested 12-hour thunderstorm videos on YouTube.

Putting my graphic design background to work on Insta.

"Let's open this pit up!!" - me slicing into an avocado

Returning Jesus Christ Downed By U.S. Missile Defense 30,000 Feet Before Making Landfall

Chat’s favorite hangout

What’s this Alien Girth I keep hearing so much about?? 👀

Starting to feel like somethiiiiiiing’s not quite right with the US government…. Just cannnnn’t put my finger on it….

You’re telling me the heat stroked this man???

God is real, and she’s an air conditioner 🙏

As a certified yapper, it is so disappointing to know I’ll never be able to tell someone how quirky and different my death was.

I get the feeling she wants to go to bed soon.

If you’re worried what people think of you, just remember that OOF yeah, we were JUST talking about you… and that… *thing* you do…

Gay men who are willing to negotiate the rights of Trans people are the scum of the earth.

Tiny scream or a yawn??

Omg they ground her up 🥺

Gender’s made up, and the points don’t matter.

“Do you ever think about—“ I’m gonna stop you right there. No.

HORRIFYING: drinking water and walking 5+ miles a day is actually repairing my mental health.

My friends watching me go through any minor inconvenience in life.

Once I figure out how to do a cartwheel, things are really going to start falling into place

You ever have a sentence pop in your head and think, “that would be a funny post”. This isn’t one of those times, but imagine if it was??????

Partying hard for the Chicago Pride Parade!! (Getting anxiety on a balcony and counting to ten in the bathroom)

Happy Friday the 13th (printer ran out of ink)

There are gays on the internet

My husband hate crimed me during Pride Month (turned on the overhead light)

Lot of people openly talking about killing their aunts on here. Stay safe.

That feeling when you get too drunk at the potluck. Amirite chat!?

Oh my god me too!!! Me too!!! I’m not feeling left out!!! #Switch2

A vision in calico!!!!

I’m a #girldad (don’t tell her brother)

Pushing buttons in an idle game for serotonin

Today is Friday in California.

@samantonioli.com Spotify said "that's enough" and deleted the first four episodes of the podcast. Just FYI.

Twiglight 🩶

Is this anything?

Switch 2?? To what?? STRAIGHT?? No thanks 😤

You’re perfect just the way you are ♥️ April Fool’s!!! Lolololololololol

Happy Soft Launch Saturday

Constantly chasing the high of the first bottle-rolling-down-the-stairs TikTok I saw.

If you can’t handle me at my Sonny Moore, then you don’t deserve me at my Skrillex.

Teleport us to Mars, mimosa tower

Been a little TOO dependable lately. Missing the rush of canceling plans.

What the fuck is a butt crumb?

@samantonioli.com hey excuse me. You okay?

@halfmoonjoe.com new Bachel lore dropped: www.tiktok.com/t/ZT8b6nkT4/