The new issue of Ely-I magazine is out now, and if you flip to the Creative Corner section in the back, you'll find this post from my Substack! Otherwise, check it out on my blog.

All of the journalists and hacks in the UK just all came at once. The rolling news stations have gone to extended breaks so they can wipe down their studios.

Thrilled to announce that I have a new business, The Ghosting Company, offering writing services to anyone with a message or story they need to tell. If you have an idea, we have a book. theghostingcompany.com

Are you, like me, bereft and forlorn that best day of the year is over? Skip on over to my Substack and find out my solution to the sadness! open.substack.com/pub/turquois...

It's been some years (30?) since I last saw the euphemism "French letters" but it's mentioned in my current read: Eric Newby's Round Ireland in Low Gear (1985). They certainly knew how to confuse the youth in the old days 😂

Hyperacusis can be hard to explain — especially in a short GP appointment. We want to hear what your experience was like, and what support you were offered. If you’re 18+ and in the UK, you can take part using the QR code or email me at [email protected] #hyperacusis #volunteersneeded

Love is... spending the evening at a beer festival with the lads then going out of your way to swing by Ely's best takeaway (The Balti King) to bring back kebabs for both you and your near-teetotal wife who stayed at home 😍 He knows my order. Shish kebab and salad in a pita with garlic mayo 😁

It’s Tinnitus Week this week, led by the brilliant team at @TinnitusUK 👏 If you live with tinnitus, I know you you're all too aware of it. If you’re willing to share how your GP has helped you manage it (or not), I’d really value hearing from you. Link in comments or scan the QR code

I wonder if John Keats would've dug late night Chill Jazz? Y'know, when he was standing on the shore's edge and gazing out into the infinite night. Pondering the in-between.

What's my problem? Find out in the newest post on my Substack blog, where I find a solution to the book pile(s) by the bed. (Plural. Not joking!) turquoisefloyd.substack.com/p/confession... #Substack #reading #books #bookaddiction

Mum wanted to call me Rachel but Dad didn't. He won, obviously. Mum got dibs on the next baby's name.

I dreamt that high street pharmacy etc. chain Boots implemented a rule that you had to pay five pence every time you picked something up in the shop but didn't buy it. You couldn't leave the ship until you coughed up, though mine was 68p for some reason. Welcome to my brain. It is weird.

Your story matters! We’re gathering experiences from UK adults with tinnitus or sound sensitivity to understand what support is/isn’t available through their GP Confidential. Voluntary. ~25 mins. QR code to take part or✉️ [email protected] #tinnitus #hyperacusis #livedexperience

Free bowl of delicious and wholesome MINj meatballs, the future taste of Sweden for anyone eligible to vote in the BSFA Awards and fancies CAUTIONARY PULSES for Best Shorter Fiction. www.patreon.com/posts/bsfa-a...

Dreadfully sad to hear that Catherine O'Hara is no longer amongst us. She was magnificent on Schitt's Creek. Once you've seen Moira Rose in action, you won't forget her. RIP.

Our plans this week were to each spend four nights at our respective parents but that fell through and we stayed home instead. We went for my very belated (2 months late!) birthday meal at excellent local Italian Mangiare, went round the big antiques centre and did Ely Museum. It was perfect.

I love Corner Gas, so much. That's Canada's funniest sitcom, if it has passed you by (it probably has if you're not in Canada.) It walks a very narrow line between wholesome and off the wall, and it has a satisfying joke/funny ratio. It's worth seeking out, if you haven't found it yet.

I love that #casablanca is trending. Incredible movie. Magnificent acting. Made in 1942 so no-one knew how the war would end. A tremendous influence on my work.

In "celebration" of thr Pepto Bismol ad now being on the radio, I took some popular radio-friendly songs and added the "Diarrhea" guy.

We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark; the real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light. Plato

These days it feels like every time we think we’ve hit the bottom of the pit, someone pulls the plug out and we get sucked down into another level of rancid Hell. And I don't think we're done yet.

New post on my Substack blog! Someone's taking liberties with the calendatr, and I don't like it, not one bit!

Love your enemy. It'll confuse the shit out of them, but reserve the right to block the bastard if they get on your bloody nerves.

The 2025 Christmas book haul. I chose the two orange ones, my beloved chose the others.

All I want for Christmas ... are a few more responses to our GP survey on #tinnitus & #hyperacusis! 🎅 🤣 If you’re a #GP, please give me the gift of your thoughts on how you assess & manage these in primary care. To make sure you’re on Santa’s nice list, scan the QR code! #PrimaryCare

Have you ever talked to your GP about tinnitus or sound sensitivity? We want to hear what it was like — good or bad. Your experience can help improve support for others in the future. 👉 Over 18 + UK residents only. 👉 Take part using the QR code or app.onlinesurveys.jisc.ac.uk/s/nottingham...

I’m inviting #GPs to take part in a short service evaluation on #tinnitus & #hyperacusis management in #PrimaryCare Your experience can help shape better care for people living with these conditions. Survey: app.onlinesurveys.jisc.ac.uk/s/nottingham... #GeneralPractice #GPSky #BJGP #RCGP #JustAGP

I'm working on a Christmas story which I really wanted to publish in time for the festive season, but I might not make it in time. Keep your fingers crossed!

I’m looking for a little help with my PhD research: a service evaluation to understand how GPs assess and manage ppl presenting with #tinnitus & #hyperacusis. If you’re a #GP, your insights are incredibly valuable. The short, confidential survey takes around 10–15 mins. Scan QR or link in thread

🎧 Do you live with tinnitus or sound sensitivity? We’re running a study to learn about people’s experiences of talking to their GP, and what support you were offered. If you're 18+ and live in the UK, you can take part. 👉 Scan the QR code below or email [email protected] for the link.

Most years, I listen to All About Eve's Scarlet and Other Stories in September at least once, but I never think to play December in the month of the same month. Until now. What a track.

⏳There’s still time to take part! We’re inviting GPs to share their experiences managing tinnitus and hyperacusis in primary care. 📆 Survey closes 31 Dec 2025 ✅ 10–15 mins | 🔒 Confidential | 💬 Your insights matter 👉 app.onlinesurveys.jisc.ac.uk/s/nottingham... #PrimaryCare #Tinnitus #GPsurvey

Treble Seventeen, not out and new horizons. open.substack.com/pub/turquois...

New post on my Substack blog, in case you've been wondering where, oh where have I been? turquoisefloyd.substack.com/p/and-so-im-...

Zing!

Today marked the launch of a book which contains my first published short story - more fact than fiction though! It also happens to be the first thing published about my PhD research project. #phdchat #tinnitus #hyperacusis #phdsky #UoN

👋 I’m Nic Wray, PhD researcher at NIHR Nottingham BRC. We’re asking GPs to share experiences of managing tinnitus & hyperacusis in primary care. 🩺 10–15 mins | 🔒 Confidential | 📋 app.onlinesurveys.jisc.ac.uk/s/nottingham... #PrimaryCare #Tinnitus #GPsurvey #Research #Hyperacusis

Him: "We have too many books." Me: "No, you can never have too many books. If anything, you can never have enough books." *buys two more books*

I don't know if anyone else is using the phrase "The Age of Arseholes", but if you ask me, it is entirely fitting to our times. Apologies to the great Chinese proverb but: "May you live in interesting times that are not beset with arseholes."

Every day, GPs help people living with #tinnitus or #hyperacusis, but we know support varies across the UK. Please help us identify what resources & training could make a difference. 🩺 Survey link: app.onlinesurveys.jisc.ac.uk/s/nottingham... #PrimaryCare #HearingHealth #MedicalResearch

In a time of deceit telling the truth is a revolutionary act. George Orwell

I’m inviting #GPs to take part in a short service evaluation on #tinnitus & #hyperacusis management in #PrimaryCare Your experience can help shape better care for people living with these conditions. Survey: app.onlinesurveys.jisc.ac.uk/s/nottingham... #GeneralPractice #GPSky #BJGP #RCGP #JustAGP

We often speak of you.

Don’t Look Up: Writing Cosmic Horror - come join the madness - 15/11/25 - 11:00

I know from reading Adolf Hitler: My Part in his Downfall, Spike Millgan wasn't a fan of the "bloody Warsaw Concerto", but I bloody love it.

Passed an old folks home on my travels this morning, where the residents were having a singalong to 'Side By Side@ with a chap on a guitar. Made me wonder what us Gen Xers will be singing when we fill up the homes. Britpop? Metal? "Everybody! SOOOO SALLLLY CAN WAAAIT, SHE KNOWS IT'S TOO LAAAATE..."

I’m looking for a little help with my PhD research: a service evaluation to understand how GPs assess and manage ppl presenting with #tinnitus & #hyperacusis. If you’re a #GP, your insights are incredibly valuable. The short, confidential survey takes around 10–15 mins. Scan QR or link in thread

Samir Zitouni deserves the George Cross for his courageous actions on Saturday night. It's awarded "for acts of the greatest heroism or for most conspicuous courage in circumstance of extreme danger", not in the enemy's presence. www.bbc.co.uk/news/article...

Somehow Fesshole has been invited to SWEDEN. Tell your Swedish friends. Can't quite believe this is happening. We're also playing Liverpool very soon and have just announced some new Leicester dates. TICKETS --> sites.google.com/view/fesshole